Cynthia’s features tightened at the mention of the flowers, revealing a hint of the malaise her mother had mentioned. It made him aware of her pallor and exhaustion, both of which made him long to take better care of her.
“Forgive me, but I am not at my best right now.”
“No need for apologies, Cynthia. If anything it is I who should ask your forgiveness for taking so long to make my decision.” He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “As pleased as I am to know you’re expecting, I need you to know that I’d already made up my mind and planned to marry you no matter what.”
“Even if I couldn’t have children?”
“Yes, my love.” When tears spilled from her eyes, his own blurred in response. He drew a tremulous breath in an effort to fight the growing ache in his throat. “You are my world, Cynthia. To go through life without you would be untenable. And besides, no one can know what the future holds, but I do know what I have in you, and that is a partner more perfect than any other.”
Emotion caused the words to crack. Cynthia’s palm settled softly against his cheek in a tender caress that made his heart swell with affection.
“Marriage is a huge decision,” she whispered, “so I would never begrudge your need to think it through carefully, Michael. But it does ease my mind, knowing you based your decision on more than duty. Please know that you and the child I carry are everything to me. I love you beyond compare.”
“May I kiss you, or will that make you feel worse?”
She gave a small smile. “I’d like to try. Just briefly, at least.”
Taking care not to stifle the air around her too much, he leaned in and pressed his mouth to hers with the utmost of care.
James paced Cynthia’s parlor trying to figure out what to do next. He’d not slept a wink since seeing Wilhelmina safely back here last night. Too many thoughts crowded his mind, each one screaming for his attention.
“Would you not rather come sit with me for a bit?” Wilhelmina asked from her position on the sofa. She’d been watching his movements while sipping her tea. His fourth cup of coffee that morning remained untouched on the table. “I believe Cynthia’s rather fond of that carpet you’re wearing a hole in.”
He stopped, scrubbed one hand across his unshaved jaw, and glanced at the mantelpiece clock. “It’s nearly an hour since Michael and I arrived and you took him up to see Cynthia. He ought to have joined us by now.”
“And I’m sure he will at any moment.”
“It shouldn’t take this long to propose. Unless of course…” He caught his breath and stared at Wilhelmina. “What if she has refused him?”
“I’m sure she wouldn’t do that.”
“But what if she has? What if she has decided he doesn’t love her enough or…or…” He caught Wilhelmina pressing her lips together as if to stifle a laugh. “What?”
She chuckled and lifted one shoulder. “It’s just that you were so set against their making a match before. It’s rather endearing watching you get so riled up at the prospect of their no longer wishing to do so.”
Her comment shook him. “But they must. If she is going to have my grandchild, I’ll damn well drag them both to the church myself if need be.”
“And I’m sure they’d be thrilled,” Wilhelmina said. She stood and moved toward him. Her arms came around his neck while a smile, so full of affection it soothed the tempest within, lit up her eyes. “It will not come to that though.”
He wanted to believe her, but what other explanation could there be for the delay? “How can you be so sure?”
“Because they love each other. And because Cynthia is my daughter. As such she understands how far a mother must go in order to protect her child. She would never give birth out of wedlock, James.”
“You’re certain?”
“As certain as I am that you are the man with whom I intend to spend the rest of my life.”
His heart jolted. “Mina…”
“Just a piece of assurance,” she said right before she pressed her mouth to his for a sweet and gentle kiss.
“Sorry to intrude,” Michael said, forcing an end to the lovely embrace. He stood in the doorway. “I just thought you should know that Cynthia and I intend to marry as soon as possible. If you could help me obtain a special license, Papa, I’d be grateful.”
James grinned as he crossed to his son. He shook his hand, then pulled him in for a tight embrace. Stepping back, James met Michael’s gaze. “Nothing would please me more.”
“Considering how sick Cynthia feels at the moment,” Michael said, “we’ve decided to have the wedding here. Provided the two of you will serve as our witnesses?”
“We’d be delighted.” James looked at Wilhelmina who nodded her agreement. “Once we have the special license, we’ll find ourselves a clergyman.”
“Shall we be off then?” Michael asked.
“Give me a moment,” James said. Michael bid Wilhelmina adieu and retreated to the foyer. James reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Happy?”
“Very much so. And you?”
“I finally feel as though the world is starting to spin the right way again.” When she grinned, he caught her mouth in a deep kiss intended to serve as a promise. He would return with the special license, their children would marry, and then he and Wilhelmina would see to their own happily ever after.
This, unfortunately, would involve dealing with Cloverfield. God help him but there was not enough light in this world to banish the fury he felt when he thought of what the duke’s father had done and what the duke himself had planned. It was contemptible. If anyone ever deserved to be drawn and quartered, it was they.
Suppressing the shudder that threatened to jar him at the awareness of how Wilhelmina had suffered – of all she’d been through – and how he himself had treated her later, with utter disdain, he did his best to convey only love as he took his leave. And as he did so, he reminded himself that if it had not been for that long ago atrocity against her, Cynthia wouldn’t exist. Neither would the child she now carried.
There was beauty in the fact that they did, even if accepting the deed that had brought them into the world would never be possible.
Knowing about it would without doubt haunt him for the rest of his days, James realized while he and Michael made their way to Doctors’ Commons to find the Archbishop. He loved Wilhelmina and hated the fact that she had been tricked into an abusive situation from which she’d had no escape. He’d never get over it, even if he would fight to keep his anger at bay for her sake.
Instead, he would dedicate the rest of his life to undoing the pain and heartache she’d suffered by loving her for all he was worth. To this end, he would pledge himself to her forever, a decision which prompted him to ask the driver to stop by Pennington House on the way.
“I hope you don’t mind,” James told Michael. “It’s just a small detour. Shouldn’t take long.”
“Does this by any chance have something to do with you winning Mrs. Lawson’s hand?” Michael asked wryly.
“As a matter of fact, it has everything to do with it.” Pennington House was where they had met. It was where Wilhelmina’s reputation had been torn to pieces. It seemed like the most fitting place to try and restore it, however much he was able.