She wasn’t sure when she was going to do it, but it was a pilgrimage she wanted to make. Her broken ankle and moment of feeling vulnerable and frail had opened a window in her soul somewhere. Maybe destiny had led her to the box with their love letters and photographs. It was time. And just knowing that made her feel as though she had grown wings.
Chapter 4
The shoot on Thursday went surprisingly well, in spite of Maddie’s being on crutches and less able to move around than she usually was. The studio assistants she always hired for shoots helped her, and she was in full control of the session by the end of the day. The actress she had been assigned to shoot for the cover of Vogue had never felt as glamorous or as beautiful, and she and Maddie hit it off brilliantly. The famous movie star was sixty-nine years old, full of life and energy, and she felt like a girl again in the eye of Maddie’s lens. The shoot was a great success, and Maddie was certain the editors would be thrilled with the results.
She had a great feeling of satisfaction when she went to bed that night. She was still on top of her game, despite her unfortunate accident.
As soon as she got her walking cast, she could put weight on her left leg again, gingerly at first, but by the day after, she was moving around with ease. She kept the crutches at hand to ensure her balance, but didn’t need them as much as she had a week before.
The shoot on Monday went equally well, and at the end of the day, Maddie sat in her office looking pensive. She had a plan. She’d been thinking about it for days, and the more certain she became, the stronger she felt. She hadn’t been sure when she wanted to do it at first, but she realized that the time was now. Remarkably, she had no firm bookings for the next few weeks, only several tentative things in the works, which was rare for her. In five weeks she’d be shooting in Shanghai. She had the time now and the desire, and everything about it felt right.
She did everything she needed to do the next day, without telling anyone. She was going to disappear for a few weeks. She was planning to check in with Penny occasionally so she wouldn’t worry, and Penny could reach her on her cellphone if anything important happened. But she was going on a trip back in history to quietly close doors to the past, and open the windows to the future. She was excited about it.
On Wednesday evening before she went upstairs to pack, Penny found her at her desk with a peaceful look on her face, and a bright light in her eyes. She observed her suspiciously. She knew her well.
“You’re up to something. I know you are. I can tell.” Maddie didn’t deny it, and only smiled.
“Maybe so,” she admitted cautiously. “I don’t want you to worry about me. I’m fine. I’m going away for a while.”
“How long a while? Months? Years?” Penny was panicked.
“As long as I need. Don’t book anything for the next month. I’ll be back in time to do Shanghai.”
“You’re going away for a month?” She almost shrieked it. Maddie hardly ever took a day off, even on weekends. In fourteen years, Penny couldn’t remember any time when Maddie had taken two weeks off, let alone a month. “Are you going alone?” She wondered suddenly if there was a man in Maddie’s life she didn’t know about. Anything was possible. Maddie often kept her most private thoughts to herself.
“I’m going to visit some old friends. I’ll see how far I get. I’ll check in with you when I can. I don’t want to take calls, unless there’s an emergency with the kids. I need some time to myself.”
“Is Deanna threatening you again? Did you have a fight?”
“No. She’s still harassing me about the benefit. The answer is still no. She can’t use the firehouse. You can deal with her after I leave.” She stood up then and came around her desk to hug Penny. “Take care of yourself. Thank you for holding the fort.”
“Thank you for telling me, I would have had a heart attack if I came in tomorrow and you were gone.”
“I know, that’s why I said something tonight. And thank you for taking such good care of me. Please take care of yourself while I’m gone.” Maddie looked at Penny affectionately. It was the first time she had ever taken time for herself. Finding the box of love letters had started it, but everything Deanna had said to her had pushed her to it, and she had to do it now. She needed to face the past and the future.
“What do you want me to tell clients?”
“That I’m on a long project for a month, and after that I’ll be in Shanghai for a week. You can book me after that. I may only stay in Shanghai for a few days, but that gives me some leeway.”
“Have you told the kids?”
“Not a word. Ben and Milagra won’t know the difference. And after Deanna gives up on browbeating me into letting her use the house, we won’t hear from her for a while. I can always call them if they really need me. They’ll call you if it’s important.” Penny nodded and gave Maddie a hug. She left after that, and Maddie went upstairs to pack. She could hardly wait to get started.
She had rented an SUV, which was parked on the street, and was planning to check in to hotels along the way. For the first time in her life, she didn’t want to be tied to dates or set plans. She was open to whatever destiny chose to put on her path. She was taking her crutches with her, but didn’t really need them now. The walking cast was doing its job, and she wasn’t in pain anymore. She didn’t need her left leg to drive, so the cast wasn’t a problem.
She looked around her bedroom as she fell asleep that night. She had printed out the information on all three men she wanted to visit, and knew how to contact them when she reached their cities, and Andy on the ranch. She hadn’t given any of them warning and liked the element of surprise. If she missed them, and they were out of town, it was meant to be that way. She was leaving the whole trip in the hands of the fates, to show her what she needed to see and understand. She wanted to go backward in time, just long enough to touch the past, and go forward with a lighter heart.
She was up at six, showered, dressed, had tea and a slice of toast, and was on the road at seven, heading north toward Boston. She figured she’d be there by noon. She didn’t know Boston well, but had liked it when she’d been there, and would be content to walk around if she couldn’t reach Bob immediately. He might not even want to talk to her after all these years. She recognized that as a possibility too. The men she wanted to see now, for the first time in years, might not be nearly as excited at the prospect of seeing her.
She had been on the highway for two hours when Deanna called the office and asked to speak to her mother. Penny told her she was out.
“Out? At nine o’clock? Where? Is she shooting on location today?”
“I don’t know where she is,” Penny said, smiling to herself, thoroughly enjoying foiling Deanna’s plan to harass her mother again. It was time someone stopped her, and Maddie had escaped.