“You think she’s suicidal?”
“No, but she’s in a dark place. If she can overcome whatever it is, we can have a great future.”
“And if she can’t?”
I rub my jaw. “One problem at a time, man. One problem at a time.”
Chapter Twenty-two
Devyn
Aaron sits up, stretches, then leans over and kisses me. “We really do need to sleep at my place more. This bed isn’t big enough for the both of us.”
“As soon as you stop sneaking over here every time you see me on the roof.”
“It’s your fault; you climbing out there with just a T-shirt on. You’re too damn sexy.”
“I’ll wear flannel pajamas next time,” I tease.
“You’ll do no such thing.” He stands, pulls on his pants, and eyes my notebook next to the bed. I forgot I left it there. He frowns and pulls the wad of money from the back cover. “Dev, will you please open a bank account?”
I swipe it from him and shove it and the notebook in a drawer.
“Seriously. You’re making some good tip money. You shouldn’t leave it lying around.”
“You think someone will steal it?”
“We have strangers here almost every weekend.”
I laugh. “And you think your rich guests are going to come into the tiny bedroom where the help sleeps to see what jewels I might have?”
He buttons his shirt. “You have a point, and please don’t call yourself the help.”
“Lora calls me the help.”
“If you’re the help, what is she? She works here, too.”
I pull on my shirt. “That is so not the same.”
“Are you going to hang out with Mickey again today?”
“You know I am. Every chance I get.”
“Want a ride?”
“I’ll take the ATV.”
“But then I won’t get to spend more time with you.” He sits on the edge of the bed and pulls on his boots. “If you lived with me in the cabin, I wouldn’t have to follow you around like a puppy, begging for a few minutes here and there.”
“You don’t beg.”
“Yeah, but you have no idea how much I want to.”
I sigh. “I think it’s too soon.”
He kisses my nose and pops off the bed. “Doesn’t mean I won’t stop asking.”
“Give me twenty minutes to get ready. I think there are some leftover muffins in the kitchen. Take some on your way to shower.”
He waggles his eyebrows. “I could shower here.”
The man is insatiable. I can hardly blame him, though. I get the same way every time I look at him. “If you think two people in this bed is crowded, I promise you don’t want to try the shower. We’d never be ready in twenty minutes.”
“My shower is huge,” he says on his way out. He gives me a heated glance over his shoulder. “Just sayin’, in case you have a list in your notebook of the pros and cons of moving to the cabin.”
“I don’t. Now go.”
His laughter rings in my ears long after he’s gone. I love his laugh. I love everything about him. I fall back on the bed and stare at the ceiling, wanting this moment, this feeling, to last forever.
I push away the voice in my head saying it can’t work out. That I can’t have a future with a man who doesn’t even know my name. My past. Maybe I could make one up—a name and a past. I really was Devyn Dunlop once. People change their names all the time. Why not me? But I’d be lying to him, and even Devyn Dunlop would have to have a background check to get a job. I’d never be able to do more than I do right now.
I get up and shower, convincing myself these are problems for another day. Right now, I just want to enjoy him, the horses, and this place for as long as I can.
He holds my hand all the way to the stables. It feels normal, like it’s something we’ve always done.
When we get out of the truck, he jokes, “Have a good day, dear.”
I give him crazy eyes.
He laughs. “Would you prefer honey? Baby? Sweetheart?”
Bile rises in my throat when I think of all the times I was called those very names in jail. “None of the above. I prefer Dev, if it’s all the same to you.”
“All right.” He sneaks in a kiss when he’s sure nobody is watching. “Have a good day, Dev.”
“You too.”
Excitement courses through me as I get closer and closer to the training paddock. Mickey sees me coming and waves me through the gate. He seems genuinely happy to see me, which I hope is the case, since I’m spending so much time here.
The mare he’s with is not one I recognize. “This is Gypsy. She’s an old pro. She’s here for a demonstration. Did you do your homework?”
“I did.”
“Then tell me, what are the steps in teaching a horse to lie down?”
I remember all the reading I did. “First, teach her to lower her head, then pick up her feet on command, and move her hind feet under herself. I’m missing one. Oh, right, lift her front leg.”
“Perfect. You get an A on your homework. Now watch as I combine all those steps to get Gypsy to lie down.”
I’m in awe at the ease with which he gets her to do it. “That’s amazing.”
“It’s not always this easy. I have to work on some of them for weeks to get them to do it.” He waves at Merle, one of his assistant trainers, and he brings another horse into the paddock. Then he takes Gypsy out.
“This is Hammer. You remember him from the other day? I thought he’d be good practice. Today, we’ll work on step one. If you’ve ever watched a horse lie down, you’ll notice it will always lower its head and sniff the ground. It’ll keep its head down during the entire lying down process. Teaching it to lower its head is a vital clue to your horse that it’s time to start thinking of lying down. Pop quiz: how do we teach Hammer this?”
I smile because I know the answer. I’ve spent hours and hours on my phone, researching how to train horses. “You apply steady downward pressure on the lead rope until he drops his nose.”
“For how long?”
“As long as it takes. Minutes, even.”
“And when he does it?”
“Reward him by immediately releasing the pressure, even if he’s only gone down an inch or two.”
He hands me the lead rope. “Want to give it a try?”
I apply the downward pressure. Hammer immediately lowers his head almost all the way to the ground.
I narrow my eyes at Mickey. “You’ve already taught him this, haven’t you?”
“Didn’t want you to fail at your first attempt.”
“Let me try one he doesn’t know.”
He laughs. “I do love an eager student. Okay, tell me more about step two.”
“You have to be able to control what each foot does. Tap the back of his leg at the pastern or fetlock with a lunge whip. Keep tapping until he picks up his foot, then reward him by stopping.”
“Go ahead, give it a try. Even if he only shifts his weight, reward him because he’s responding.”