Aaron looks angry. “He was reelected shortly after Kasey died.”
I nod. “According to reporters, it was a tough race, but after she died, nobody felt they could attack his character or badmouth him in any way, so he won.”
“He’s running for senate now,” he says.
“I know. I looked him up when you first gave me the phone.”
“Maybe you should go see them.”
I sit up. “Are you crazy? No way.”
“It might give you some closure.”
“One of the first things I did after my release was go by our house. Only it wasn’t their house anymore. They’d moved and didn’t tell me. They never told me anything. No one even visited me in jail. I thought after enough time had passed, my mom would come. She didn’t. Neither did my friends. Two years and not a single visitor. Do you know how pathetic that is?”
“Your friends, what were their names… Angie and Dane? They never visited?”
“Angelina. She hated when people called her Angie. No, they didn’t come either. They never talked to me after that night. They told the judge it was my idea to leave Kasey in the house alone. They said it was me who opened the gate and left the slider open.”
“But it wasn’t, was it?”
“Honestly? I can’t be a hundred percent sure. I’d been drinking. I remember telling them I wouldn’t smoke pot in the house with Kasey there, and I believe I was the one who opened the pool gate. Everything else is a blur.”
“They threw you under the bus to save themselves. You get that, right? If they’d testified about what really went down that night, they would have given the three of you probation or something. Instead, your friends saved themselves.”
“I’m sure Ed went to them and their parents. He wanted me punished. He didn’t care about them. He hated the closeness I had with Kasey. He was always working, and when he came home, he expected her to jump in his lap and love him. But he was never home. He was practically a stranger to her.”
“He wanted you punished because he was a crappy father?”
“It doesn’t really matter, Aaron.”
“You didn’t deserve two years in jail.”
My stomach rolls. “What do you think is the proper trade-off for a little girl’s life?”
“Devyn.” He reaches for my hand, but I pull away.
He lies back and looks at the stars in silence.
“Don’t you understand? I don’t want to be my mother. She never wanted kids. She had them for her husbands. Even if I agreed to this, you’d be a doting dad like Richard, and I’d be the pathetic mom like Roseanne. What if something happened to you and I had to do it alone? You really want your kid being raised by someone like me?”
He takes my hand and doesn’t let me pull away this time. “You are not your mother, and you are not what happened to you. The mistakes you’ve made don’t define you. I want to take you somewhere tomorrow.”
“I’m not going to see them.”
“Fair enough, but that’s not where I’m taking you.”
“Where, then?”
“You’ll see.”
“Why do I feel like you’re trying to trick me?”
“This isn’t about you at all. It’s about me. Will you go?”
“Under one condition.”
“Name it.”
“You don’t tell anyone about the baby. Not Maddox or Andie or Quinn. Not until we decide what to do.”
“Agreed. Now will you lie down and put your head on my chest or something? I’ve missed the shit out of you this week.”
“And my head on your chest will be enough?”
“It will be for now. Because I know you love me.”
I move closer and do what he asks, because I’ve missed him too. The feel of his heartbeat is calming. I just wonder how he can be so calm when I’m sure there’s a storm on the way.
Chapter Twenty-nine
Aaron
“Aren’t you scared?” Devyn asks, seated next to me in the truck. “I mean, aren’t you freaking out? You’re twenty-three years old. There must be a million things you want to do before you have a kid, not to mention how scary it would be to be a single father.”
I take her hand. “First of all, I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure I won’t be a single dad. I want us to do this together.” She turns and looks out the window. I squeeze her hand. “We have how many months before the baby comes?”
“Seven, I guess.”
“Seven months is a lot of time to get used to it. Did I set out to be a dad at my age? Of course not. That doesn’t mean I don’t want it. It’s a part of me—of us. And I’m pretty damn fond of us, if you haven’t figured that out already.”
“What if I can’t do it?” she asks. “And you should know, right now, I’m pretty sure I can’t.”
I give her a tug. “Come here.” She moves from the passenger seat to the middle seat. “We have time. Nothing has to be decided today.”
“And you haven’t told anyone?”
“I promise nobody will know until you’re ready, or, you know, it becomes obvious.”
She sinks into the seat. “Oh, my god.”
“Don’t worry, it won’t happen for a while. Most women don’t start to show until well after twelve weeks. And since you aren’t short and you haven’t been pregnant before, it’ll be more like sixteen, even longer if you don’t wear tight clothes.”
She pulls back and studies me. “How do you know all this?”
“It’s amazing what you can find on the internet. The baby is about the size of a cherry right now.”
Even in my peripheral vision, I see her jaw go slack. “How is that possible? It looked so fully formed to be that small.”
“It is almost fully formed. By the end of the third month, everything is in place, and it simply grows bigger from then on.”
“Can we not talk about this anymore? How about you tell me where we’re going.”
“It’s a surprise.”
“I don’t like surprises.”
“Duly noted.”
I drive into a modest neighborhood. The houses are close together, and a lot of them look alike. I’ve been here several times. I know it’s the brown house on the corner of the second intersection. I pull into the driveway. On the mailbox is the name Marshall.
“Who are the Marshalls?”
“You’re about to find out.” I hop out of the truck and run around to open her door.
As we head up the sidewalk to the front door, I admire the tree I helped plant a few years ago. I ring the bell. Devyn is tense. I run a hand down her arm. “Relax.”
Mrs. Marshall opens the front door and smiles, then pulls me in for a hug. “Aaron! I’m so glad you came. When you called this morning, I told Jim he had to work from home today so he could see you.”
Mr. Marshall appears beside her and extends his hand to me. “Nice to see you, Aaron.”
I nod to the yard. “I’m happy to see the tree is getting so big.”