“But look at that,” he whispers and all I can do is nod because I am looking.
“I haven’t seen her this happy in so long. I think she needed this more than I realized.”
“Any time she’s with her family, she’s like this. She lights up. It’s what keeps her going. Keeps her strong and motivated to beat it.”
My father is talking about my mother. I was talking about Grace.
“Come on.” He throws his arm over my shoulder. “Let’s go open a bottle of something we shouldn’t and drink it on the patio.”
By patio, he means the stone structure off his office. There are three patios and those are just the ones attached to the back of the main house. This one is his own sanctuary, cut away from the main gardens and outdoor space, my father hides here frequently. His office is in the farthest reaches of the compound, and he uses it wisely.
We claim chairs, tucked away, hidden behind evergreens, arborvitae, and flowering hydrangea while protected from the misting rain by the overhang.
“L’Chaim,” he says, lifting his glass to mine, and I nearly choke on a sputtered laugh.
“When did we convert to Judaism?”
“We didn’t, but the sentiment is powerful. To life. Can you think of anything better to toast to? With your mother being sick, I’ve been searching through many religions, taking in the pieces that mean something to me.”
“L’Chaim,” I repeat, clicking my crystal with his and taking a sip of the insanely smooth bourbon. It’s like butter down my throat and I lick my lips, immediately taking another drag.
“You must be wrecked after your shifts last night. Still, we’re so happy you came.”
“Unfortunately, we won’t stay long. I promised Grace an early departure so she could get some rest and maintain her balance or whatever she calls it that keeps her neurologically in line.”
“Are Grace’s seizures becoming a problem again?”
“No. And that’s how we’re trying to keep it.”
“We’re?”
“I’m her boss.”
“You’re more than that, Carter,” my father states with assurance, his eyes on his glass as he swirls the liquid around. “Or at least, she’s more than that to you. It’s written all over you. The way you look at her. The way you’ve looked at her over the last year, even when we’re all together and you think no one notices you watching her. Your mother and I have both noticed it.”
Great.
“She’s single now, correct? And temporarily staying with you? Seems the perfect ingredients for something more to happen.”
“Nothing more can happen between us, Dad. She can’t be anything to me other than what she currently is.”
“Except she already is, so you can quit lying to your old man. But if you’d rather not discuss this with me yet, I understand. Timing is everything. I was in love with another woman, the wrong woman, before I married your mother. I know Oliver told you of this.” His eyes meet mine and I incline my head that yes, Oliver has told me with our father’s permission. “I thought that woman was right for me, my one, when she was anything but. Sort of like Grace with Tony?”
He cocks an eyebrow at me and I just chuckle, sipping my drink, and throwing my ankle up on my opposite knee. “Tony was definitely wrong for Grace, but that doesn’t mean I’m right for her.” Though as the words tumble from my lips, they feel like a lie, and I know he sees that in me. “In any event, she’s been single a little over a week. Besides, it’s… complicated. For too many reasons.”
“But you love her.”
It’s not a question and I freeze. I haven’t allowed myself to think that way. To use that word as directly as he did. “I…” I lick my lips. Do I love her? Does it matter? “Grace is not someone I should be in love with.”
He stares at his glass as he speaks. “Sometimes love comes from places you least expect it. Places you shouldn’t even go searching for it. But the funny thing about love is that it doesn’t care. About your plans. Your expectations. Your wants or desires. You can scheme. You can pretend. You can imagine and think and maybe even believe. But love, it knows better. And in the end, it always wins out.”
I gulp down my drink in two hard swallows, holding the glass out for a refill. He lifts the bottle from between us and obliges, hitting me up with another two fingers.
“She’s not there with me, Dad.”
“No,” he agrees. “Maybe not yet. But that’s where patience and persistence come into play.”
16
When I said I wanted to throw a party for Grace’s birthday, I didn’t expect Oliver to take over and rally the troops so the gang’s all here. All five of my brothers, Rina and Brecken, plus Margot, Halle, Aria and their guys, Drew, Jonah, and Wes, as well as a smattering of other friends of Grace’s.
We didn’t invite any of Grace’s friends from the hospital except for the trusted few here because we haven’t told anyone else there she’s living with me. She said the last thing she wanted was for Janet Johnson to find out about that and I am, for once, in one hundred percent agreement with her on that.
It could be bad news for both of us if that secret got out. Especially with that conniving snake.
But this party…
Food. There is so much food spread across my counters and let me tell you, these are big ass counters. Barbeque, because that’s what Oliver wanted. Tapas from this amazing place in the South End because that’s what Rina wanted. Mexican and sushi—don’t ask—because that’s what Margot wanted. Grace didn’t have an opinion either way, she was just excited for anything.
All with a lot of alcohol.
Margaritas. Martinis. Beer. Wine. My condo has become a Fourth of July backwoods fest and everyone is partying accordingly. My big mouth started this party, and it appears everyone else is finishing it off for me. I haven’t moved from my perch in the kitchen, keeping my distance and pretending to play host all the while watching from afar as Grace has an amazing time.
She’s been laughing and drinking with her friends. I’ve been trying not to stare at her since the moment she left her room earlier and I saw what she’s wearing. A flowy coral-pink dress with a deep V-neck and straps that tie around her neck. Her smooth, creamy back is partially exposed as are her legs since the dress ends a couple inches above the knee.
I nearly passed out from all the blood in my body rushing to my dick.
Oliver bought her a weekly organic food box subscription which is so brilliant for Grace, I’m pissed I didn’t come up with it myself. For all the sugar that woman packs away, she also tries to cook and eat extremely healthy for herself during the week. Lots of fruits and veggies as well as lean meats and protein.
She was so excited when he showed her that she squealed and threw her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. Being jealous of your baby brother sucks and now it makes me question my gifts for her. The ones I have yet to show her.
I’m working this harder than I’ve ever worked anything with any woman. My father’s words a lead blanket covering me with their weight and potency.