“I think I shall go for a walk,” Lyari announced. Without further comment, she shoved her stool back, got to her feet, and hurried toward the stairwell. I rolled my eyes at her retreating back. Coward. As the door closed behind her, I moved to drag her plate across the counter. If she didn’t plan to eat it, I would.
“I can’t wait to break down that one’s walls,” Emma said. I believed her—there was a gleam of anticipation in her eyes.
Stalling again, I pretended to be absorbed by the food in front of me. The conversation about Lyari was inevitable, though. If she was going to be living with us, the others should know what leaving the Unseelie Court truly meant for her. The potential risk involved. I didn’t plan on letting Lyari deteriorate into a goblin, but I wasn’t taking any chances. Not with Matthew in the picture. Resigned, I opened my mouth to tell Emma, but the old woman spoke first.
“Your parents don’t know that you’ve been missing, by the way,” she said. “I left that up to Damon, but I don’t think he could bring himself to tell Maureen.”
It was no mystery why. When Damon disappeared, Maureen had become a different person for a while. A sad creature with hollow cheeks and a dull look in her eyes. “I’m glad he didn’t tell them.”
“So… you don’t intend to go back to Consuelo?” Emma asked, taking a bite from the plate she’d prepared for herself.
The question made me pause. My gaze dropped back down to Lyari’s half-eaten pancakes. For an instant, I saw flashes from the night that had sent me to Consuelo in the first place. Bare branches overhead. A black sky.
But those images gave way to different ones, fragments from another night. A crackling fire. Bare skin. Silver hair and long fingers. The panic that had been edging in slowly retreated, like fog evaporating beneath the luminescent rays of an ever-brightening dawn.
“I’ve been…” I cleared my throat and made a vague gesture. It seemed better than saying, Laurie and I have been fucking like rabbits. “I, uh, faced my fears. I overcame my trauma and all that. So I don’t need to go to a therapist anymore.”
Emma hesitated. She picked up a piece of bacon, and she held it between two painted fingers as her faded eyes met mine. “Sweetheart, that’s not how healing works. It takes time to go forward after… what you went through. That pain will come back. I’m so happy to hear you’ve benefited from the sessions with Consuelo, which is why you should keep seeing her. You can talk to her about anything, you know. Your conversations don’t have to be about one topic.”
She was so earnest, so sincere in her concern for me that whatever annoyance I might’ve usually felt just wasn’t there. Swallowing a sigh, I went against my instinct to avoid touch and put my hand over hers. Emma’s fears whispered through me and a faint flavor coated my tongue. Thankfully, it was overpowered by the coffee and syrup. “Okay,” I said. “Okay, I’ll keep seeing her.”
Emma rewarded me with a huge smile. I smiled back, thinking about how it always felt slightly easier when I was around her. Before we could say anything else, Damon finally emerged from the bathroom carrying Matthew on his hip. My nephew’s dark hair was combed back and he wore a striped sweater. His big eyes met mine, and in spite of the magic ring I wore, the toddler didn’t seem concerned or alarmed at the sight of a stranger in our loft.
I dropped my fork and thrust my arms out. “Hand Matt over to me, and no one gets hurt.”
Damon rolled his eyes and heaved a resigned sigh. He complied just as Emma shoved the bacon in her mouth and blurted, the words muffled, “Dibs on the shower!”
Hearing this, I wanted to kick myself. There were now seven people living in this loft, and I should’ve thought about the fact there was only one shower besides the one in the master bathroom. I bounced Matthew and raised my voice to call after her. “Emma, you could’ve just used mine!”
Now wearing a coat and hat, Damon came to put the same items on his son. He tucked Matthew’s arms into the coat sleeves and raised his eyebrows at me. “Hey, I’ll take you up on that offer.”
“Of course. Seriously, use it anytime. Where are you—” Something furry and gray dove beneath my stool. As Damon lifted Matthew from my lap, I peered down at the kitten that had finally deigned to make an appearance. She batted at my ankles and I caught hold of her, ignoring the pinprick of her tiny claws. “There you are. I really need to figure out a name for you, huh?”
“Actually, we’ve been calling her Hello,” Damon said, looping a scarf around Matthew’s neck.
A soft laugh slipped out of me. I dodged a swipe of the tiny creature’s paw. “Why? Where are you going, by the way?”
“Work. I got a job at the clinic in town. Just a front desk thing, but it has me thinking I might go back to school. Major in nursing.” Damon shrugged.
I gaped at him, then cast an exaggerated glance around me. “How long was I gone?”
“You’re hilarious. Oh, and the name thing. I was trying to teach Matthew how to say ‘hello,’ but he got confused, and he decided that was the word for kitten, I think. Or maybe he just couldn’t get enough of greeting her, I don’t know. By the time he stopped, we’d all started calling the cat Hello. Now he responds to it. So… sorry about that.”
The name struck a chord inside me, and I was so distracted that I didn’t respond. Damon propped Matthew on his hip again, preparing to leave while my mind went back to that conversation with Collith for the second time since waking up. There are many things I cannot promise, because we live in a world of variables. Anything I can promise, though, I do so gladly. My home, my life, my heart. I will never tell you goodbye, because I will never leave you. I will give you a life of hellos, Fortuna Sworn.
I blinked the memory back and realized that my brother had opened the door.
“Damon,” I said. He turned back, still holding Matthew in his arms. Standing there, Damon resembled our father so strongly that an ache filled my heart. I strove to hide it as I told him, “I think that’s a great idea. The nursing program, I mean. You’d be really good at it.”
Damon paused, giving me a look I couldn’t decipher. “Thanks, Tuna Fish. I’ll see you tonight, okay?”
“Yeah. See you tonight.” The kitten—Hello, I corrected myself silently—mewled and wriggled, frantic to be free again. I bent to return her to the floor. She darted across the room like the devil was chasing her. I hopped off the stool, too, thinking I’d load the dishwasher before Emma finished with her shower.
That was when I noticed Damon had stopped again. I assumed he’d forgotten something, and I rounded the island without comment. His voice floated to me at the same moment I removed a plastic, child-sized plate from the sink. “I’m really glad you’re back,” he said.
Startled, I turned to meet my brother’s gaze. Part of me was terrified this was another one of Belanor’s tricks, or it was a dream I’d wake up from soon. “Me, too,” I managed.
Probably sensing my fear, Damon offered a parting smile. I found myself staring for a different reason entirely, now. Because it was the smile he used to give me, back when everything was simpler. Before we’d gone beneath the ground and reemerged from the darkness with terrible scars. The curve of his lips was a soft and crooked thing, full of fondness and shared history. The image etched onto my mind like a tattoo. It made me remember the day I’d gotten in my car and found Damon sitting in the passenger seat. We made a promise, remember?