I haul ass up the rock wall, trying to purge all this insecurity and vulnerability through sweat. When I glance back, Aldis is advancing on me, which for some reason, pisses me off. Is he always going to be one step ahead of me? Could we really be equals to Bowen? I know Bow loves me, but could he love Aldis more? Is that what they’ve been whispering about? After all, Aldis already knows his way around a man. He can give Bowen things I might never be able to.
I make it to the top of the wall seconds after Aldis, and with a huff, I scale back down before he even has time to gloat about his victory. I want to get out of here. I want to see Bowen and ask him if I’m being pushed out. I want—
“Babe.” Aldis puts his hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
Shaking my head, I get out of the harness and stomp off in the direction of the locker rooms. I’m out of sorts and don’t know how to get back to normal. Aldis is quickly behind me, grabbing my hand as I try to get to my locker. I pull away, but he refuses to let me go, twisting me and pushing me against a tiled wall.
“Hawthorne. Talk to me. What did I do wrong?”
I force my eyes to meet his gaze, and the pleading in it makes my breath catch in my throat. He’s so unbelievably handsome and confident and…fuck. Oh my god.
“Thorne?”
I think I’m in love with him. I blink rapidly, trying to make sense of the warring emotions assaulting my brain. I let action take over and cup his face, pulling him in for a bruising kiss. His hands move to my hair, twisting it around his fingers as he explores my mouth.
His kiss is completely different from Bowen’s. With my best friend, I can feel the years of friendship and affection, of unrequited and new emotion, of history and the future. With Aldis, I feel his need, his vulnerability, his commitment to me.
With a nearly empty locker room, we kiss our way around the wall where the showers are, tugging sweaty clothing off and dropping them haphazardly to the tiled floors. Aldis breaks the kiss long enough to get us into a stall and start the water before practically slamming me against the tiles and claiming my mouth again.
My hands move across his hard body, all muscles and hair and man, as he grinds our dicks together. Steam swirls around us, and as I break the kiss, there’s only one thing I want to do. I sink to my knees, pausing for just a moment to study Aldis’s huge cock before taking him into my mouth.
He groans as his hands slide into my hair again. I tilt my head to allow him deeper into my throat, gagging more than once as I find my rhythm. He feels good in my mouth, and as I suck him, thoughts of all the other things we can do together flood my mind, leaving me leaking and desperate for release.
“Thorne,” he whispers.
I stand, attacking his mouth again as he pulls my body into his. We kiss and hump against each other, our bodies slick with water, sweat, and precum, until Aldis groans and shakes against me, clinging to my shoulders. I join him seconds later, spilling onto his skin. We continue kissing, gasping, and whispering each other’s names as we float back to earth.
Aldis pulls back slightly, his eyes heavy from what we just did. “Better now?”
I nod, chuckling. “Much.”
“Let’s get out of here. We need to talk.”
* * *
ALDIS
After getting dressed, Hawthorne and I walk to the coffee shop next door to the gym and grab a couple of drinks. We sit across from each other, not saying anything for a few minutes until Hawthorne chuckles.
“I’m sorry, Aldis. I got in my head about some shit, and it was fucking with me during the climb.”
I nod. “Want to talk it through?”
He rubs his throat before leaning back in his chair. “This is all new to me, obviously. It’s like, after years of keeping myself bottled up, the lid is off, and I don’t know who this new version of me is yet.”
“I get it.”
“Listen, Aldis, I’m gonna be as honest as possible. I’m in love with Bowen. He’s my world.”
Oh no. Is this the part where he says he can’t share?
“Now that I know what’s possible between me and him, I can’t get enough.”
I wrap my hands around my cup, bracing for the inevitable.
“I see all of your interactions. I notice the closeness. I see the way you look at him, and I felt like, what if he could love you more than me.” Hawthorne exhales slowly. “What if we’re not equal, and he just wants one of us. Wants you.”
“Thorne—”
“Let me finish please.”
I nod, shutting my mouth.
“And then it hit me,” he continues. “Yes, I’m a little jealous, but it’s because I want you to look at me the way you look at Bowen.” He reaches for my hand. “You don’t look at me that way though.”
I watch him as he swallows hard, obviously still processing his thoughts.
“Aldis…I’m falling in love with you, and I’m scared as fuck that this won’t work and we’ll all end up heartbroken. I’ll lose you, and I could lose Bowen.”
Holy fuck. He’s falling for me? “Can I talk now?”
He nods.
“You won’t lose Bowen, ever, okay? I’m scared too, Thorne.” I squeeze his hand. “I have just as much at stake, but I’m so invested in making this work. You don’t think I felt the same about the history that you and Bow share? Do you see how he looks at you? I could never compete with his feelings for you.”
His brow pinches, but he nods.
“I think what we all have to learn is that it’s not a contest. This isn’t The Bachelor where we have to compete for his heart. The way he loves us will be different. The way he shows it will be different. We each have our own dynamic.” I squeeze Thorne’s hand. “I’m crazy about Bowen, that’s true. I adore him, but Thorne, babe, can’t you see how much I want you too? Can’t you see my heart opening for you both?”
“I didn’t know I could love two people so completely and insanely at the same time.”
“Isn’t it beautiful?”
He nods, moving to sit in the chair next to me. He doesn’t say anything at first, just searches my eyes.
“Thank you for coming into our lives,” he whispers. “You’ve changed everything for the better.”
“But?”
Thorne shakes his head. “No but. I just, um…” He closes his eyes for a moment before opening them slowly. “I think I just needed to know that you had feelings for me too.”
This isn’t the place to do what I want, so I simply stand and lead Thorne to the truck. He sits in the passenger seat, and I stand between his legs with my arms around his waist.
“Thank you for being open and telling me what you’re feeling. I’ve definitely worried that once Bowen knew he could have you, there wouldn’t be room for both of us, but I know that’s not true. I hope you see that now too.”
“I do.”
“As for us, I’d be a big-ass liar if I didn’t tell you that I was falling too. I want to keep this so badly. It’s driving me insane. I think about the two of you all the fucking time. I want to wake up with you both. Damn, Thorne. I want so much.”