The past couple of weeks have been amazing. Neither of us has brought up the future and a possible internship. But pressure for the competition is dialing up, and my mom’s words linger in the back of my mind.
“I bet the guy’s done some crazy shit in his life. That’s why you’re so hot for him.”
I cough, some of my drink going down the wrong way. “Excuse me?”
“His influence is all over the justification.”
Relief edges in. It makes sense that his ideas would creep in, because we’ve been talking about it—not only after class, but at night in bed and over dinner a couple times when I’ve hitched a ride back here with Daniel and Andy after dance class.
“Plus that stuff about underwater reclamation,” Adam continues. “You really want to save the world?”
“You’re going to inherit a company someday. Do you want to use it to leave the world better than before?”
A dozen feet away, Madison’s eyeing Royce, who’s being obtuse as usual.
Across the yard, Betty’s throwing a football with some grad students.
We might each have our own weirdness, but we’re together. People are celebrating a beautiful day in a beautiful place at the kind of university most kids dream of attending.
“I don’t know, Liv. Maybe we can try.” His frown deepens and he brushes the pendant under the neckline of my sweater, hooking it out with a finger. “You never told me how you got this back.”
I step away, forcing a smile. “I guess it was meant to be.”
There’s a heavy look in his eyes.
“Everything our parents did, it doesn’t have to determine where we go, who we are.” He reaches for my arm and pulls me toward the side of the house just out of sight.
Normally I’d brush him off but today feels like a day for truth.
“Adam, when we were together you didn’t see me. You didn’t try. You took for granted the time we spent together. And I’ll take some of the blame, I should have asked for what I wanted.”
“Which was what?”
“Connection. Compassion.” I lift a shoulder. “You to go down on me once in a while.”
He straightens up, an incredulous laugh on his lips. “You wished I’d gone down on you? That’s why we broke up?”
“We broke up because you cheated,” I correct. “That you never went down on me was just one more reason I came to accept it.”
He steps closer. “I know you, Liv. Let’s bail on this place and I can show you. You can tell me what you like and I’ll give it to you.”
I back toward the edge of the house, and swear I feel Sawyer’s eyes on my back.
“You were my first everything, and I don’t regret it. But it wasn’t meant to be that way for either of us.”
“I always figured it’d be you and me when everything shook down. I still do.”
He bends closer, his lips brushing across mine before I can stop him.
He tastes like mint and nostalgia, and I press a hand to his chest to push him away.
A throat clearing behind us makes us turn.
Sawyer looms overhead, a glowering god ready to deal out punishment.
I rub the corner of my mouth, afraid he can see Adam on me.
“You’re missing the party.” His voice is dark and too quiet.
Adam smirks. “Just the opposite, Professor. We were saying how great it is.”
Sawyer’s going to kill Adam. He’ll rip him in half and hide the body parts in the garden.
Scratch that. The way he looks, he’s not going to bother hiding the body.
“We’re fine, Professor Redmond,” I insist, loading every word with meaning. “But thanks for your concern.”
The intensity of his gaze pins me in place and it takes everything in me to break it.
I nod to Adam. “Come on, do you want to sign the poster?”
I return to the draped table, catching Sawyer’s eye for the briefest moment and willing him to relax. “They’re going to blow it up and hang it in the…” I trail off as I realize the Sharpies aren’t here.
I head inside to find them.
Nothing in the kitchen, so I head for the living room and spot a cup of pens there.
“Nice markers. Surprised Dr. Lancaster has a stash of them.”
Adam’s voice makes me jump as I lift the cup, which includes a few of my pink gel pens.
Before he can say anything more, a chest-high tornado tears into the room.
“Can I see the fish?” Andy demands when he stops in front of me.
“Sure, Andy. He’s in my dance class,” I explain as I lead the way.
“Shit, that’s a big tank,” Adam comments.
“It’s no ocean but it holds a lot. Close as you can get to a habitat they’re comfortable in.”
“Tell me what they all are?” Andy asks.
I point them all out, and describe each of them. The catfish, the blue acara, the silver dollar fish.
“The black ghost knife fish is the coolest.” I crouch around the side of the tank, pointing behind some seaweed, and Andy follows. “He comes from South America, and he’s actually electric. Not enough to light you up, but it helps him find food.”
“Can’t he see it?”
“In here he can. But in the wild, not so much. He’s nocturnal which is why he’s hanging out back here.”
“He’s huge,” Madison says, coming up behind us.
“About a foot, but they can grow to a foot and a half,” I confirm. “And he has almost no true fins. Just pectoral ones.”
“Are there more of them?”
“Not in here. They’re a bit hard to handle and can get aggressive if they don’t have their own space.”
Come to think of it, it’s no wonder Sawyer likes this fish. They have at least one thing in common.
The front door rings and I head for it.
When I pull the door wide, my smile freezes.
The man standing on the new porch is the last one I expect.
“Dean.” He’s here with his wife. “I didn’t realize... Everyone’s around the back.”
He walks through the house and I shadow him, getting bad vibes the whole way. I hold the door for him and his wife to descend into the yard.
Sawyer glances up, his expression darkening as he takes in his new guests.
The dean clears his throat. “About the justification next week.” My stomach tightens. “I wish you all the best.”
“Thank you,” I say, and mean it.
After the pressure of the last few weeks, it feels good to have the support of the department.
In the kitchen, I start cleaning things up. It’s only a moment before I feel his presence at my back.
“You can’t hide from me.”
The hairs on my neck lift at his low voice. “Figured I’d help out in here since you were busy being a good host.”
“So grabbing the kid and making a run for it wasn’t an effort to escape?”
“I didn’t want you going down for murder. I’m getting used to your bossy ass.”
When I turn to face him, he’s leaning against the wall, arms folded.
“Thought you knew what exclusive meant.”
“He kissed me. He caught me by surprise, and if you believe it was anything more on my side than that, then you’re a moron.”