Amber was seated in the booth and I was certain that she was trying her best to man the panels but had absolutely no idea what she was doing. I tapped her on the shoulder and she turned to me with relief clear in her eyes. “Oh thank God, you’re finally here!”
She stood up and forced me to sit and then pointed at the band. They’d stopped playing and Julian was turning to everyone and he looked a little upset. “What the heck, that wasn’t what we’ve discussed earlier! Dylan, you’re not supposed to play during Carlos and José’s part!”
Carlos was the bass guitarist while José played the electric guitar and sometimes the acoustic when they did acoustic covers. Dylan played the drums and as for Julian, most of the time he didn’t have an instrument but sometimes he played the keyboard when it was needed. Then Julian turned to look at the glass that separated us and I knew he was looking at Amber.
“Amber, you’re supposed to tell us when the music sounds good or not!”
This was why they weren’t meant to start recording without me in the room or Theo since we knew what we were meant to do. Amber looked at me, eyes begging for help. I leaned close to the microphone. “Why are you even re-recording the song in the first place? The previous arrangement was good and we’ve all agreed to it.”
Julian’s eyes narrowed when his eyes fell on me. “And why are you here when you have errands to run for me? Julio’s meant to be groomed today or did you forget that, assistant?”
He was mad at me and he had all the reason to be. I treated him like trash this morning when all he did was be nice to me. Julian didn’t even allow me to respond because he turned back to the boys. “Let’s have a break until Theo gets here since Amber has absolutely no idea what she’s doing.”
Julian opened the door and got out of the recording booth. Amber looked up at him but even she was ignored by Julian as he walked past me and then pushed open the door and left the room. “What’s up with him? He’s been an ass since this morning.”
Dylan was the one who complained. I felt someone tug at my hand and I turned to look at Amber. “Did you two fight again?”
The boys were still in the room with us and since the recording studio wasn’t exactly the biggest room in the house, we were all cramped. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. “It’s a silly argument. You know how it is with the two of us.”
I couldn’t really tell her the whole reason why because well, I didn’t want to have a fight with her too if it’d lead to that. “Okay. Maybe Jules is just overreacting. Can you order us pizza?”
Carlos looked hopeful but he knew that Julian didn’t like it when they ordered me around too even if it was mostly favors but I nodded my head as we all piled out of the recording studio and headed downstairs. Julian was sitting on the couch, checking the things that I got him and then he motioned at the grocery bags.
“Put them in the pantry,” he said monotonously. Dylan glanced at me and began helping like he always did, when Julian let out a low growl, “and I didn’t ask you to do it, Dyl. What’s the point of having an assistant when she has other people do her job?”
Carlos whistled lowly. “Whatever argument you two had must’ve been a big one if he’s this pissed.”
José cleared his throat as I began to pick up the bags one by one and headed to the kitchen. Amber was sitting close to Julian and had Julio on her lap and she was playing with him. “So Amber, we didn’t really get the chance to chat. How have you been doing?”
Amber looked up at him and smiled bashfully. “I went to Paris after my incident. I’m sure you’ve all heard of it.”
“You were the buzz in the campus for a while,” Dylan said quietly. “You’re okay now, right?”
Amber nodded and smiled at him. “Yes, I am, Dylan, so please stop treating me like fragile glass. And you know what, I’m a little upset none of you came to visit me. I thought we were all friends.”
By the time that Amber made that remark, I was halfway back in the living room from the kitchen and my heart dropped to my stomach. José rolled his eyes. “Jules and I came running to the hospital when they rushed you in.”
Amber’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “You weren’t there.”
“We were.” It was Julian who answered this time and his gaze was fixed on me, cold and hard and I felt a shiver go through my spine and the fear of the truth slowly numbing me. “But Audrey demanded that we leave stating that it was my fault that you did what you did.”
Yesterday, none of us mentioned the incident and I thought it was something that we all wanted to put behind us. Amber had moved on and I had warmed up to Julian but here we were now and there was no point in denying.
“I knew that Audrey’s been mad at you because she knew you broke my heart but she knows the heartbreak had nothing to do with what I’ve done to myself. She was just being protective.” Amber was defending my actions no matter how truly irrational and immature they were.
Julian pursed his lips. “So you weren’t ever mad at me?”
Amber looked at him and shrugged. “You were Julian Hudson, the Casanova in NYU. To be honest, it would’ve been a lot more surprising if you didn’t dump me.”
Julian blinked and then tilted his head to the side, looking deep in thought. “So if you weren’t ever mad at me, why did you block me on all your social media accounts right after?”
My heart was about to burst out of my chest with how fast it was beating. I felt like I couldn’t breathe and the fear made me dizzy. “I didn’t.”
Amber’s answer was so simple and even she sounded confused. It was then that I felt all eyes fall on me and I shifted uncomfortably from where I stood. I could feel Amber’s penetrating gaze on me. “Did you do it, Audrey? Or did my parents ask you to?”
I swallowed and then chewed on my bottom lip. “Your Dad left me in charge of your phone and I…I blocked everything that was affiliated and connected to Julian because I wanted to erase him out of your life. To me, he broke you and I…I thought that if you got better and maybe you’d still be in love with him or he’d try to contact you and you would fall for him…”
“That’s a load of bullshit, Audrey.”
Julian’s eyes resembled a raging storm as he glared at me and he stood up from his seat. Everyone sprang up, seeing the rage that simmered through him in his eyes. I backed up, my heart dropping to my stomach because it was now time to face the consequences of my own actions.
Amber was quick to defend me as she stood in front of me and looked at Julian. “Audrey did that to protect me. Won’t you do the same thing for your friends or your brothers, Julian?”
But Julian ignored her as he advanced towards me. “That’s not the point. She knew, Amber. She knew how the guilt pained me because even I thought I was the reason. And it took me so damn long to realize that maybe you had other issues and the breakup was just caught up in the mix of it all.”
“I called you out on the reason why you hated me because you felt guilty that you didn’t see the signs,” Julian’s voice was shaking as he spoke, “and I hurt you when I called you out on it so I had to understand that you were appeasing your own guilt but fuck, Audrey, you blocked me in all her accounts when I was trying to say sorry, when I was trying my best to apologize to appease my own guilt.”