"I don't—"
"You wanted to go back to the house after work, and I told you to meet me at the clubhouse instead. You changed your mind without an argument."
"I don't argue." She pushed against him. "I don't want to talk about this."
"You're going to talk." He latched her hands behind her back, keeping her encircled in his arms. "You have no problem speaking up to the truckers at the diner, but you won't speak up to me."
"I talk with you."
"You don't speak up." He paused. "There's a difference, and you know it."
She stared at his chest, refusing to talk. He wouldn't let her slide back to shrugging off his concerns. When she came to his house the first time, she was quiet as a mouse. Now she joined in on the teasing and the laughter, making the house a home for not only him but each of his brothers.
"Do you want to be my woman?" he asked.
She raised her gaze. "Yes."
"Why?"
Dice claimed she was broken. He was determined to prove otherwise.
She shook her head, trying to reach up and kiss him. He stopped her from touching him. She wasn't going to distract him. He needed to know the truth.
"Do you like me?" He cupped her face, forcing her to look at him. "Are you falling in love with me? Or, are you just enjoying the moment, doll? Are you fucking me to get a roof over your head? Are you with me because I'm taking care of you? Do I take care of you the way you always wanted Dice to take care of you? Is that it, Timber? Am I part of a sick game where you—"
"Stop." She whimpered.
He wasn't going to let her get off that easy. "I could've had Danielle tonight. I could've taken her right in front of you. You wouldn't have said shit about it. You would've stood there watching me fuck another woman."
"No." She squirmed, trying to get away from him.
He refused to let her get off the Harley. "No? What would you do? Run? Is that what you'd do? You'd run away like your mom runs away? Like Dice runs away?"
"Stop." She grunted, pushing against him.
He grabbed her upper arms. "What scares you, huh? Do I scare you?"
"Yes," she yelled, shaking uncontrollably.
He let go of her and backed away. She reached for him before stopping herself. Shoulders hunched, she hugged her middle, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Everything scares me. I'm afraid I'll never be enough for you. That someday, you'll look at me and walk away like everyone else has in my life." Her voice cracked. "I care about you more than I should. I tried to stop because it hurts."
He stilled.
"I'm scared I'll say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. I go around believing you'll kick me out of the house any minute or worse. You'll ghost me." She sucked in air. "It's easier if I don't say anything. It doesn't hurt as much. I can pretend I'll never lose you completely because there's always a chance you'll come back to me." She gasped. "You'll come back to me."
Jesus Fucking Christ.
She'd grown up with her parents coming and going, leaving her for long periods. She never had a choice. Her parents kept her moving and hid her away from Sparrows, fearful of her grandfather hurting her. She never understood why her childhood was fucked up. She thought it was her fault, so she stopped letting herself feel. She stopped fighting back. She stopped questioning. She stopped being herself because she tried so damn hard to hold on to her parents.
He wasn't even sure she understood what she was doing to herself. What she was doing to him.
"Doll..." he whispered.
She shook her head. "I'm not perfect. I know that, but isn't there a small part of you that wants me?"
His chest ached. "More than a small piece of me wants you, Timber. I want you in my life, by my side, for the rest of my days. You're so damn scared of losing me, you haven't seen that I've fallen in love with you."
"I don't want you to leave me," she whispered.
He stepped up to her, breathing hard. "That's what I need from you, doll. You keep your heart open, and I swear on my life, I'll be gentle and cherish it until I die."
"You're not mad?"
He groaned, the pain of needing her more than he could contain. "I love you."
"You do?" She sniffled.
He palmed the side of her neck and kissed her softly, holding his lips against her mouth, soaking her in. Her pulse beat erratically under his palm. She was scared shitless about losing him that she was protecting herself in the only way she knew how.
He pulled back. "I" He kissed her again. "Love." He rubbed his lips against hers. "You."
She sagged against him, inhaling deeply. Her lips caressed his mouth every time he touched her. "I love you, too."
Chapter Thirty One
Timber slid down the gas tank on the motorcycle and landed on Romeo's lap. She twined her arms around his neck as he stiffened, not knowing what she was going to do. He'd poured his heart out. For her.
No one had ever communicated with her that way, forcing her to talk.
All she'd heard growing up was to mind her own business, do what she was told, and don't question her parents. But it was what she wasn't supposed to hear but had overheard that kept her from voicing her feelings.
"When I was young, my mom begged my dad to stay home, promising him they could be a family." She smoothed his beard down over his jaw. "My dad told her they could never be a family because of me."
Romeo frowned. She swallowed. The heavy burden of carrying that secret her whole life made her tired.
"There were other times I could hear them plotting a life together once I was an adult and not in the way." She raised her chin and met his eyes. "They don't want me. They never have."
"I think you're wrong," he said.
She gave a slight shake of her head and inhaled deeply. "It doesn't matter anymore. I just want you to know that if you ever need to know how I feel, to ask me. I won't always know it's okay to tell you what's wrong or that nothing will happen if I disagree with you. I've kept how I feel to myself for as long as I can remember because anytime I've taken the chance to express myself, my dad leaves, or my mom goes away."
"I will never leave you."
"Good," she mouthed, smiling sadly. "I'm so scared of losing you. I'm afraid you're going to look at me and realize that I don't fit into your family."
"Never."
Her heart pounded. "I love you and your brothers."
He captured her mouth. She rocked forward, pressing her breasts against the front of him. All her energy swirled around her because tonight seemed more like a celebration than a heated exchange.
He loved her. No one had ever told her that before.
She opened her mouth, kissing him deeply.
Romeo growled, slipping his hands under her armpits and lifting her. Like a ragdoll, he turned her around until she faced away from him.
Her legs draped over his.
"Grab the handlebar." He lifted her arms. "Hold on."