Taking my gun from the dresser to the left of the door, I raise it and shoot her in the face. So fucking done with these bitches. Should have done this a lot sooner. It’s also my fucking fault I got so drunk I didn’t pay attention to who I was fucking. Her blood splatters over the room, and everyone outside shuts the fuck up.
“Clean up in my room,” is all I say as Wiz tosses me a cloth to clean the blood off my face.
I run to my bike and don’t see Justine anywhere in sight. Fuck. I should have instated a rule that if bitches want to leave, they need permission first.
“Pres, man, can’t let you drive, you’re still drunk,” Manic says, taking the keys out of my hand.
“Give them back, before I put a hole in your head!” I shout at him, swaying slightly.
Rage grabs me and hauls me back inside. “Sleep, shower off, then search for her after. You’re in no condition right now, man.” Fuck, he’s right. I hate that he’s right, so I haul off and punch him in the face.
“Don’t worry, boss. We already sent a prospect to find her and make sure she stays put. If we knew she wasn’t actually invited here, we wouldn’t have let her in,” Manic tells me.
Fuck, it’s no one’s fault but my own. Never should have been fucking that bitch in the first place, not when I had Justine. Melissa warned me time and again that I’d do something to fuck it up, and I did. I just did. I just hope I haven’t lost Justine for good.
I WAKE UP HOURS LATER and see the room is cleaned and quickly go for a shower. I need to find Justine and sit her down and have a serious talk with her. Last night was fucked up, but I take full blame for it. I need to be a better man for her. For my daughters, for my grandkids.
Fuck, we’re even changing the club around a bit. Yet, here I am, still the same fucked-up bastard I always was. I can’t keep living like this. I know I have to change. I just don’t know how.
I drive to Melissa’s first, hoping to get her advice. But the minute she sees me, she slams the door in my face. Fuck. I knock again and this time, Slammer, her husband answers, and steps outside.
“Pres, man, don’t go in there. Melissa is on the phone with Justine and she’s tearing you a new one. If you want Emily, I can give her to ya, but Melissa said not to let you in.”
Fuck me, I seriously fucked up. “No, keep Emily a little longer? I’m going to hunt down Justine.”
He smirks, “Good luck with that.”
Narrowing my eyes at him, he goes back inside before I can ask him what that’s supposed to mean. Fuck.
I take off and go to Justine’s. Her car isn’t in the driveway and the lights are off. Next door, a car pulls in and out comes Tomas from his house. “You looking for Justine?” he calls, as someone gets out of the car in his driveway. Man is tall and looks familiar, but I can’t place him right now. I turn back to Tomas.
“Yeah, we had a fight, trying to get her to talk to me.”
“Sorry, man, I know how Justine can be when she gets riled, she may have gone to her dad’s.”
Fuck, this is pointless, I head back to the clubhouse, hoping Wiz and Manic can do some magic and just find her for me. Makes shit easier.
Chapter Forty-four
Justine
I roll over in bed and check the time. Just after eight. I should get up and head home and face the music. If Carson thinks he’s got another shot with me, he’s sorely wrong. I’ve said it before, and I refuse to keep saying it, but I don’t do cheaters. It’s why I fought so much to keep us nonexclusive. I knew my heart would shatter if I didn’t.
Now look at me, I’m heartbroken in the worst way. At least when I was with Tomas, we had an agreement about other people. But not Hangman, he refused to share me with anyone. They say the only way to get over someone is to get under someone new. And I plan to do exactly that. Fuck Hangman, fuck him.
Getting dressed and double checking I got everything, I check out of the hotel room and head home. I see Hangman’s bike in the driveway, almost as if he’s been here this whole time just waiting for me. Next thing I have to do is change my locks.
The second I’m out of my car, he storms out of the house. “Where the fuck were you?” he roars in my face.
Raising a brow, I shove him back. “Not really any of your business now, is it?”
I shut my car door and walk around him to my house.
“I’m gonna need my key back,” I tell him as I unlock the front door.
“Fuck that, what you need is to let me explain.”
“Pfft, no explanation necessary. I saw what happened with my own eyes. Saw that bitch’s vagina juice all over your cock, a cock I might add, that wasn’t wearing a condom. So, now I have to book an appointment with my doctor to make sure you didn’t give me an STD.”
“The girls are clean; we make sure they are. Monthly. I didn’t give you shit. Now would you just turn around and look at me?”
“Really don’t want to, because when I think of your face, all I want to do is punch it.”
“Justine,” he pleads with me.
“No!” I snap and whirl around to face him once I’m in my living room. “We’re over, Hangman. That’s all there is to it. We’re done. Fucking done!” I scream.
“We’re not fucking done!” he yells back at me, getting in my face. “We’ll never be done. But I will let you have some time, a few weeks to calm the fuck down and then we’ll talk.”
“Whatever, a few weeks, a few years, it changes nothing,” I sneer at him. Because it doesn’t. Fuck him and his bullshit.
“I meant what I said last night, might have been drunk while saying it, but I fucking love you. So, no, I’m not letting you go. No matter how much you fight this, you’re mine. I’ll change, I swear.”
Typical, male bullshit. He’ll never change. He should have learned his lesson when he lost his first wife. I don’t say anything to him and just stare at him, waiting for him to leave. He must see something in my eyes that he doesn’t like because he cups my face gently. “I swear I’ll make it up to you. I vow it.” He kisses my forehead and walks out of my house, leaving behind my key like I wanted.
Why does this feel so shitty? I hate this. I never wanted to feel like this ever. I had enough hate and anger coursing through my veins thanks to my fucked-up mother, now I’m dealing with it in my love life.
I go to my computer and boot it up, transferring the money I spent on Melissa’s debit card from my account back to hers. Thankful she let me have a night to myself, I shoot her over a little extra. I know she’ll probably get mad about that, but she deserves it.
With everything done, I decide to head back to bed to wallow in my misery.
Chapter Forty-five
Hangman
“Fuck!” I roar as I throw a lamp across the room. I’ve lost Justine, I know it. Fuck me and my dick for not thinking shit through last night. I knew I shouldn’t have done it, but I did. She’s stronger than my ex-wife ever was, standing up to me like that.
Where Vicky would just sink into herself and not speak up, Justine is opposite, calling me out on my bullshit. Last night was fucked-up and shouldn’t have fucking happened. I knew I had a good thing with Justine, and I blew it.