He has me get up on the bed and a nurse brings in a portable machine. “If we can’t see this way, it’s because you’re not far enough along.”
He moves the doppler over my stomach after putting some warm jelly on me and the sounds start up in the room. A swooshing noise rings clear. “That is your baby’s heartbeat,” he tells me.
Oh god, I’m really going to be a mother.
Before he can show me the screen and determine dates, Carson storms into the office. “What’s wrong, is everything okay?” he asks hurriedly.
I don’t know what to say, then the doctor clears his throat. “I take it you’re the father.”
“Yeah, I’m...wait, what? You’re having my baby?”
The doctor struggles with that news, that he’s my man, not my dad. And I have to hold back a laugh. “Sorry.”
“I just found out,” I tell Carson.
His eyes soften, and he comes up next to me. “This is the first time I’ve been part of this from the beginning.”
At those words, my heart melts just a little toward him.
Chapter Fifty-seven
Hangman
Pregnant. The doctor just said she’s pregnant and about twelve weeks along. Was she going to hide this from me? Did she even want this? I know she said that she didn’t want kids but we’re here now. We leave the clinic and I follow her home letting the prospect get back to the clubhouse.
Justine and I have to talk, and I’m not leaving her until I get through to her that she’s mine and I’m her’s. For her, I’m changing. For her, I’ll be the man she needs me to be.
Once inside her house, I follow her into her bedroom. “We’re talking.”
“You’re right, we have to talk,” she says, sounding resigned.
“This changes things. I wanted to give you more time, but you’re not spending a day without me being here. I want to be part of this pregnancy every step of the way.”
“I love you, Carson,” she says. This is the second time she’s said it to me and this time, completely out of the blue. I go to reply back but she holds up a hand to stop me. “You hurt me beyond anything, something I knew you’d do but I let it happen. I feel like it’s partly my fault for not being more open with you about it. This baby does change things, but I don’t know how to get past this and forgive you.”
“You let me worry about that, you just be you. I’m different, you make me different. I vow to you that I’ll never hurt you again, you’re my lifeline.”
“I believe you,” she whispers coming close to me. “It will take some time, but I forgive you, Carson. I love you beyond any rational reason. You make me dizzy.”
I smile at that. “I love you, too. You’re the sun in my life I’ve always needed.”
With those words she rushes me, throwing herself in my arms. Lifting her face up, I capture her mouth with mine, needing her now more than ever.
Panting she pulls back. “I need you.”
“I need you, too.” We quickly get undressed, and I cover my body with hers. Needing to just feel, I line my cock up against her entrance and push in, slow. Painfully fucking slow.
“I need more, Carson.”
“You’ll get what I give,” I ground out, slowly thrusting in and out of her. Just relishing in the feeling of us together. It’s only been a week since I had her, but it feels like longer.
My pace picks up as her cunt squeezes my cock. “Kiss me,” she demands, and I comply, as she comes undone around my cock.
LYING IN BED BESIDE her, she snuggles in close, my arm going around her and get up on my elbow. “I’m sorry for what I did,” I tell her, needing her to know that just because we just made up doesn’t mean I’m going to stop making it up to her.
Her body tenses before relaxing again. “Stop, Carson, stop bringing it up. I forgive you. We’ve gone over this,” she says sleepily. “You can make it up to me by just being a good man.”
“You got it.”
I’ll do everything in my power to be the man she needs me to be.
“I hate to do this, but I’ve been a shitty father the last little while. I need to go get Emily from Melissa.”
Justine laughs. “Go, I don’t mind, I need sleep anyway.”
I give her a kiss, get out of bed, and get dressed. Heading out, I steal back my key that I left behind when she kicked me out.
Everything as of now will be different.
Chapter Fifty-eight
Justine
A month passes and my stomach just gets bigger, I’m not used to this feeling. Carson, true to his word has been an amazing man.
Everything with us has been different, we go to the clubhouse twice a month, once a month for family time. The family day BBQs have been a hit at the club. I love having that time there, getting to know the other old ladies and the families of the guys.
Not even the club girls are allowed at the clubhouse on family days. Which is amazing. Although the other day of the month I go to the club house with Carson outside of family day, the girls have been amazing. Hell, I’ve even struck a friendship with a few of them. Not all of them are trash like that Shannan bitch was.
I don’t even ask Carson about her, I know what happened to her, and if I ask it will just have it confirmed. I don’t want to know that my man is a killer. I know he is, it’s obvious, but I don’t want to know about it.
“Justine?” Tomas calls as he enters my house, it’s been a while since I’ve talked to him, and now it just seems weird.
“Up here.” I call from my room, as I finish packing the last of my stuff in this box. I finally saw the inside of Carson’s house and yeah, it’s definitely nicer than mine. And bigger, more rooms. Which makes sense since we’ll need to have a new nursey for this little one. I rub my stomach as I get up and Tomas comes into view.
“Woah, you sure there is just one in there?”
“Ha-ha, very funny,” I grumble.
“What are you gonna do with the house?”
“Well, it’s mine outright, I was thinking of renting it. I was looking at the market and there isn’t a lot of houses in this city that are up for rent.”
Most likely, the house will be rented out to someone from the club since Gunner is looking for a place of his own but isn’t sure about buying just yet.
“Need any more help?”
“No, I’m done here actually. I just finished the last box. But if you want to help lug everything down the street, I won’t complain about that.”
Tomas smiles and lifts a box off the floor. “By the way, I met someone. His name is Kyle.”
“Oh, that’s great.”
“And her name is Janet.”
I do a double take. “Wait, what?”
He shrugs. “I met them both, they both know about each other, and we all want to explore this relationship.”
I would hug him right now if it weren’t for the fact that he’s carrying a box. “I’m so happy for you, I hope it works out.”
“Thanks, Justine. Without your support I don’t know where I’d be right now. Have to admit I’ve struggled a bit since we broke up, but it was for the best.” He’s right, it really was for the best.