Shayne’s brows furrow and I see the fear in her eyes, wanting to save me from whatever she’s about to say, but she knows I need to hear it just as much as my brothers do. “A few minutes after your son was born, Felicity started to hemorrhage. There was just blood … everywhere. I couldn’t stop it, couldn’t control it. It just kept coming and I panicked. I couldn’t help her. I swear, I was trying to save her, but there was just … nothing,” she says with a heavy sob, squeezing my hand as though that’s magically going to make the pain go away. “There was nothing I could do but watch her die while she held onto her son.”
My gaze lingers on Felicity’s body, and the longer I stare, the harder it gets. “Was she scared?” I question, at odds with my emotions, glad that she died from birthing complications rather than at my father’s hand. “When she died. Was she scared?”
Shayne shakes her head. “I don’t believe so,” she murmurs. “She was concerned about the baby. That’s all that mattered to her. She was terrified of what would happen to him growing up in this world, but I assured her that he would be safe with us. I … I can’t exactly speak for her, but I think she was almost relieved to go, that it was finally over for her.”
Shayne’s words kill me more than she will ever know, the thought of Felicity enduring this hell for so long at my father’s hands and not being here to save her. What would she have thought of me?
Levi moves in closer, standing directly behind Shayne, his hand dropping to her shoulder. “Where’s the baby, Shayne?” he questions, asking the one question I’m too fucking scared to hear the answer to. “What happened to him?”
Shayne looks back at me, fresh tears forming in her eyes. “I tried to stop him,” she says, choking on her sobs as they get stuck in her throat. “But your father … he … he …”
My eyes close as the overwhelming grief takes over me. She said earlier that he was fine, but I won’t believe it until I hear exactly what happened. “Spit it out,” I roar, the mix of frustration, guilt, fear, and devastation creating a vile mix.
“He was down here the whole time, watching her die and he just … he did nothing but watch,” she cries, tears streaming down her blood-stained face. “I tried to run with the baby, but he blocked me in. I had nowhere to go and his hand … he overpowered me. He took the baby and promised that he would use him as a weapon against you. I swear,” she adds, her violent sobs tearing at my already shattered heart. “I held onto him as long as I could. Your son … he’s gone. Your father took him, and I don’t know how to find him.”
With that, I take one last lingering look at Felicity’s body, taking in the face that I’ll never see full of life ever again. I get to my feet and walk the fuck out.
8
Shayne
Felicity’s body rests in the back of the SUV, the smell singeing my nose just as it has done for the past four days, forcing me to relive every fucked-up little moment from my time down in Giovanni’s basement. Roman couldn’t bear to leave her behind, and I don’t blame him. If I could have taken her with me when I first escaped, I would have. I would have done anything to try and make what happened down there okay.
Roman killed me today. Seeing the intense agony in his eyes was the hardest thing I’ve ever endured. I’ve never experienced someone else’s raw grief like that, and being the one who had to break the news, the one who could have saved her, and the one who’s personally responsible for letting their father take off with his newborn son … yeah, the weight I thought had lifted off my shoulder has crashed back over me with extra bricks added to the load.
He’ll never forgive me for letting her die like that, and he sure as fuck won’t forgive me for letting his son be taken. I was weak in those cells. I was desperate and I let him down. I let them all down.
Roman sits up front with Marcus while Levi sits in the back with me, his arm curled tightly around my body as my head rests against his big shoulder. Doe is on my other side, curled up in a ball as she rests quietly, her big head draped across my lap. The SUV is huge, but the backseat simply isn’t enough space for Levi and me plus a ginormous wolf. She would have been more comfortable in the back, but with Felicity taking up residence in there, we didn’t want to risk it.
My fingers thread into the fur on top of Doe’s head and she gently stirs beneath me only to make a show of getting comfortable, silently pleading for me to scratch her head. My fingers move in and out in a gentle massage behind her ears, and a low groan travels through her chest. Pain tears at me knowing the grief she must be feeling at not having her brother here with us. The two of them were like peas in a pod, always together, causing havoc over the castle and doing everything in their power to make my life a living hell. It’s as though they had some kind of competition between themselves to see who could get on my nerves the quickest, though Dill won that competition every single time. He had a gift for it, but there was no mistaking the kindness in his jet-black eyes.
I’ve been avoiding the question, not ready to hear all the gruesome details about Dill’s downfall, but I owe it to him to hear it. He protected me with his life out there in the woods. The least I can do is hear about his final moments and pay him the respect he’s owed. “Dill?” I question, my tone low and wavering. “What … how did he …”
A heavy sigh pulls from deep within me, and I let the rest of my question fade away, the words too hard to get out. Sensing Levi’s gaze, I lift my head off his shoulder and meet his haunted stare. “He’s okay,” he murmurs.
My brows furrow and I glance back down at Doe. “He’s okay?” I question, repeating his words back to him as I shake my head. “No. He was shot. I heard him howling. He couldn’t have lived through that.”
Marcus grunts from the front seat and glances back at me, his lips curved into an amused grin. “You really think Dill was going to let a single bullet take him down? That big bastard would have chewed that fucker up and spat it back out the other end. He’s a warrior, Shayne. Just like you.”
My heart flutters, its pace kicking up a gear as a fresh new hope surges through my veins. “He’s okay?” I question again. “I figured that because he wasn’t here …”
Levi’s hand falls to my thigh, gently squeezing and forcing my gaze back to his. “He’s alright,” he murmurs. “My father is a lousy shot. The bullet tore through his midsection and fucked with some of his internal organs, but we got him to the animal clinic just in time. He’s at home recovering, and trust me when I tell you, he’s pissed that he didn’t get to come. It would have been too much strain on his body.”
Relief overwhelms my system, and hot tears well in my eyes as the raging grief I’ve held down for the incredible wolf begins washing away. “I thought we’d lost him,” I whisper, my voice breaking as losing Dill, on top of everything else, was just the bullshit cherry on top of this shitstorm cake.
“Don’t get me wrong,” Levi says. “Dill isn’t completely out of the woods yet. He had a big surgery to repair the internal damage. He’s on all sorts of pain medication and probably won’t be able to take a proper dump for a while. He’s a grouchy asshole, but he’ll pull through. He always does.”