I thought about the little boy who had walked off into the neighborhood in search of a strong man who could help him and realized he’d gone in search of what my grandfather had given me—a father figure. Strength wasn’t something he’d found in his home, so he’d needed to look for it elsewhere.
I raised my head. “Kal, I just figured you out.”
Without opening his eyes, he said, “Thank God. I was worried it might take you until morning.”
I snuggled to his chest again and smiled. “You’re grumpy.”
“No, I’m sleeping. The telltale difference? My eyes are closed.”
A thought came to me, and I voiced it before I had a chance to filter it. “Did you tell your mother and sister that you’d be here?”
“No.”
I ran my hand across his muscled chest. “I think I understand why you wouldn’t.”
He rolled onto his back but kept an arm around my waist. “You want to tell me now, don’t you?”
I closed my eyes dutifully. “It can wait.”
He pulled me closer and kissed my forehead. “Just say it.”
I looked him in the eye and shared what my heart told me I needed to say. “You pull away because you’ve had to find your strength outside of your family. And you think that being strong is what your family always needs you to be.”
He held my gaze without speaking.
I continued, “It’s okay to not have the answers, Kal. It’s okay to be confused, angry, or sad sometimes. Life can knock us to our knees. I have to believe that families are healthier when they stay and share that with each other. I’m stronger than I look. You need someone to lean on now and then? Lean on me. If you stumble, I’ll help you haul your ass right back to your feet. We can be that for each other. We’ll share the good and the bad. Just don’t pull away from me when things get tough. I’ve been left behind before and that’s my—”
He kissed me then. “Jade, how do you see me clearer than I see myself?”
I traced the strong line of his jaw. “I mean it, Kal. Today might be confusing for you. Don’t close me out of that. Let me be part of your strength just like you’ve been part of mine. You pushed me to take a second look at what I was accepting from others and expecting from myself.” I gave his chest a pat. “I could never have been an astronaut’s wife. I’m not happy sitting back and waiting for someone to return to me. I want to go on the adventure too . . . even when the going is rough.”
He sighed. “There’s something I should tell you.”
I tensed then forced myself to relax. I either trusted Kal or I didn’t. “What is it?”
“When Dominic and I spoke the last time, he gave me some advice on how I could turn my connections with known marine biologists into a profitable project. I’ve been working on it. Bilboa spoke to his contact at Netflix, and he believes they’ll call me. So far, though, it’s just a lead. It may not pan out. After this weekend I’ll also follow up on other leads. I’ll have to find a job to tide me over until something comes through.” He cleared his throat. “I’m realistic about the possibility that Netflix might not call.”
I searched his face. “Do you think that makes you less amazing? Kal Ragsdale, if you think I’m with you in the hope you’re going to be famous one day, you get your ass out of my bed right now.”
He smiled. “Technically it’s my bed. Your room is next door.”
I smacked his chest. “You know what I mean.”
“I do.” He followed that with another quick kiss then gave me a long look. “There’s another reason I haven’t spoken to my family yet.”
I held my breath and waited.
He added, “I was so angry before I met you, angry to my core. I’d given up feeling any other way. When I’m with you I feel—free of that. I don’t want to go back, but I don’t know how I’ll react if my mother doesn’t feel safe here. What if Riley’s fiancé is a douche? I keep hearing how good everything is now, but what if it’s not and that’s what I see tomorrow? I’d do anything for them, but I finally have something to lose, and I don’t want to do anything that will mess up what you and I have.”
“I love you.” There, I’d said it.
His arms tightened around me. “I love you too.”
We lay there for a while simply breathing the moment in. Then I said, “Kal, I don’t have all the answers, but I did learn something from Robert. I learned that love shouldn’t cost someone their soul. It’s not healthy to give more than you receive or bend so much that you’re a pretzel version of yourself. Good love, real love, doesn’t demand that. Your family doesn’t want you to give up everything for them. I wouldn’t want you to do that for me. Who are you, Kal? Who do you want to be? Be strong, be proud, but don’t give so much to anyone that you stop being you.”
He breathed in deeply. “I fucking love you.”
I laughed, my heart soaring. “We’ve established that.”
“I wish we’d met after this—once I had all my shit together.”
“I wasn’t proud of who I was when you met me. But maybe we were supposed to start here. We’re on a journey to somewhere better . . . not alone . . . together.”
His next kiss was so sweet, so tender it led to the kind of lovemaking that was every bit as wonderful as the night before, but entirely different. It was full of whispers and promises, and if there was a single corner of my heart that wasn’t already his—I gave it to him that night.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Kal
A loud knock on the outer door of my suite woke me. Half-asleep I reluctantly left Jade in the bed, pulled on my jeans, and went to answer it.
Paul gave me a once-over then waved his hands in agitation. “I don’t want to intrude, but I’ve been texting and calling you.”
I looked around. Rubbing my hand over my face, I said, “Shit, I think I left my phone at your sister’s boutique.”
“I’ll have her bring it over. Right now, you need to hurry. Your family is finishing breakfast. They’re headed from there out to the carnival area where the proposal is expected to happen right away. If you don’t get your ass in gear, you’re going to miss it.”
His tone had my eyebrows rising, but he was right. “How much time do you think we have?”
“Ten minutes to get ready. Five minutes of sprinting there. I’ll be outside the door waiting for you. If you get dressed fast, I’ll make sure you’re there in time.”
“On it.” I closed the door and bolted to the bedroom. “Jade. Get up. We’re late. I’m about to take the world’s shortest shower. We have ten minutes to get ready. Can you do it?”
She sat straight up. “I’ll make it happen.”
We rushed around each other, taking turns showering, brushing our teeth side by side then throwing on clothing. Her hair was up in a loose bun, her face fresh from a wash but bare of makeup as she hastily slipped on the low heel sandals we’d gotten from Marilyn.
Beating the deadline by almost two minutes we paused at the door. She straightened the neckline of my shirt. I tucked the edge of her bra beneath the material of her dress. “Ready?”