I don’t need to ask Declan how he feels. His intentions are written clear as day across his face—a snapshot into his heart that I know he reveals only for me.
I’m not ready to commit to a road trip. At least not the one he clearly wants. If I did, I would have said yes to my ex when he proposed.
Declan isn’t him. Not even close.
My heart pounds within my chest, like a trapped bird trying to fight its way out of its cage. One thought batters me, over and over, as I sip my drink in silence.
I might have made the biggest mistake of my life by marrying Declan.
Fuck me.
29
DECLAN
Iris stands the moment Leo excuses himself.
“Where are you going?”
She can’t even look me in the eyes as she replies, “Bathroom.”
I rise and grab her hand, forcing her to glance up at me. “Is everything okay?” I hate asking the question almost as much as I hate the haunted look in her eyes. Desperation claws its way up my throat, beckoning me to keep her at my side.
“Sure.” She offers a tense smile. “Do you mind calling Harrison to come pick us up while you wait?”
I nod.
“Great. I’ll be back in a second.” Her body remains rigid, spine straight as an arrow as she crosses the ballroom and turns around a corner.
I consider what might have spooked her, and I can only assume it has something to do with what Leo said. She seemed fine before he went off talking about marriage…
Did it make things too real for her? It’s plausible, given her aversion to love. She has made her feelings on the matter crystal clear, and I’ve gone along with it because it’s what she wanted. It’s not like it is any easier for me. After watching my father destroy his family after my mother died, I didn’t want to put myself in a similar position. Everyone I love always leaves anyway. Why bother letting anyone close if there is no guarantee they will ever stay?
But are you going to spend the rest of your life alone because you’re too afraid to get close to someone? It’s still the same loneliness no matter how you paint it.
The back of my neck heats, and I turn to find Iris’s eyes focused on me. A few men stop and stare at her, and it takes everything in me to ignore them as I walk across the room.
“Is Harrison downstairs wait—”
Her question is cut off by me pulling her into my arms.
“What’s gotten into you?”
“Leo stopped by and asked if we were sticking around for the auction. I told him yes.”
You’re a bastard for lying to her.
I’ll feel bad about it tomorrow. Tonight, I’ll take advantage.
She groans. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I don’t want to give him any reason to think we only came here for him.”
She sighs as she wraps her arms around me. “Is there a specific reason you’re hugging me?”
“I thought I saw someone I know.”
Will you ever stop lying wherever she is concerned?
Only if I ever grow a conscience. Given the number of lies piling up around me, I doubt it would be during this lifetime.
“Did they go away or do you plan on holding me all night?”
Well, if I have an option…
You don’t.
I sigh as I reluctantly release her only to grab her hand. “Let’s dance.”
“Is this the vodka talking?”
I shoot her a look. “It was one glass.”
She laughs. “That’s all it takes. You don’t even like to dance.”
I don’t release her hand as I lean in and whisper in her ear, “Keep making a show in front of everyone and I’ll make you regret it later.”
A shudder runs through her, and I trace the goosebumps on her arm with a single finger. “That’s promising.”
Her mouth opens and closes repeatedly as I lead her toward the dance floor. I wrap an arm around her waist, and she responds by locking her arms behind my neck. Our faces are only a few inches apart as we rock in circles to the soft music playing through the speakers.
“If you wanted to dance with me, all you had to do was ask. No need to use empty threats to coerce me.”
“Your mistake was thinking they are empty.” I allow myself to smile.
She sucks in a breath, her eyes not leaving my lips. My fingers graze the soft curve of her ass. A groan gets trapped in my throat as she jolts forward to avoid my fingers, all to run right into my now hardening cock.
Her wide eyes blink up at me. “Please tell me that’s a phone in your front pocket.”
I throw my head back and laugh myself hoarse. By the time I come back for air, I find her eyes transfixed on me. Hers and a few others around us, all acting like they have never heard a grown man laugh before.
“It’s a shame you don’t laugh like that more often.”
I lift my hand and cup her chin. “Maybe I finally have a reason to.”
Her face softens, and her body melts into mine. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?”
She escapes my question and my grasp all at once. I let her get away with it, only because she presses her cheek against the front of my tux, bringing her body closer to mine.
When the slow song bleeds into a fast-paced one, Iris squeals. I move to escape the dance floor, but she tugs on my hand and drags me back.
“I love this song!”
“Why am I not surprised?” I pretend to rub my ears in pain.
She laughs as she begins jumping up and down like a madwoman. I’m nearly knocked unconscious when she throws up her arms and sways her hips to the beat. I catch a few men staring at her rolling her body to the music, and my glare scares them off.
“Let’s go sit,” I snap.
“Please. One more song.” She grabs my hands and drags them toward her hips. “Watch me.”
I can’t do anything but watch her. I’m entranced as she shimmies her body to the beat, keeping her lower half only an inch apart from mine. The way she dances isn’t meant to be erotic, but I find myself growing aroused.
She smiles up at me. “You’re not dancing.”
I’m not sure I’m even breathing.
She laughs as she wraps her arms around my neck and tugs me closer. “Move your hips to the music.”
I try and fail which makes her break out into another fit of laughter. If that’s the reward I get for looking like an idiot, so be it.
She turns around and places my palms back on her hips. “Copy me.”
Her rasp of a voice can barely be heard over the thud of my heart. I snap out of my trance and swivel my body like hers, matching her movement. Heat courses through my body as we both move to the music. Her ass grinds against my cock, and I groan into her ear.
“Now you got it.” She laughs as she steps out of my embrace.
My hands mourn the loss of her touch as she goes back to dancing. Her eyes shut, and she gets lost in the music. I don’t bother trying to dance. I’m far too immersed in the way she moves to care about anything else. Everyone around us moves to the beat of the song until the last note plays, and the crowd disperses, ending the moment all too soon.
“That was so much fun!” She takes a step toward the tables, but I pull her back.