“Yeah, I can see that.”
“We all grew up with nannies, chefs, drivers, landscapers…all that. Honestly, until I moved out, I never had to lift a finger. I barely had to think for myself.”
Somehow, her choice not to marry Cameron seemed pretty damn brave. “What did your friends think about you walking away from your ex?”
“They thought I was mad. And it’s not just because of his family. Don’t misunderstand. He’s a really good guy. Even with our lackluster…” Gripping his arm, she got up on toes and whispered in his ear. “Sex life.” When she settled back down, she had a glint in her eyes. “We got on really well. He’s a great friend.”
Talk about going mad. She had to stop touching him. Stop acting like they’d known each other longer than two days. Jesus, she was just so…appealing. It made him want to violate that sexy, lush mouth. Put a hand on her shoulder and ease her down to her knees. He wanted to see the wicked look in her eyes as she pulled him out of his pants and licked him root to crown.
The conveyor belt moved their items forward, snapping him out of his dirty thoughts. “Did you break his heart?”
She shook her head sadly. “I embarrassed him. I frustrated him. But no, I don’t think our hearts were involved. I know mine wasn’t.”
“Okay, so it’s not even been a year. Any chance you’ll go back to him?”
“God, no.”
“At some point, though, will your parents back off?”
“I don’t want them to. I like my freedom. And as weird as it sounds, I like using my hands. It sucks to not have money, but I like figuring things out on my own. Do you know I’ve never cooked a single meal in my life?”
“I imagine poor little Phinny standing in her kitchen, staring at the refrigerator, trying to figure out how to open it. How do I get in there? Let me in.” Pretending to yank on locked handles, he made his voice sound frantic. “Sad Phinny opening the oven and wondering why there isn’t a cooked lasagna in there.”
“I’m not an idiot.” Laughing, she gave him a playful shove. “I share a house with four people who don’t wash up after themselves. The kitchen’s disgusting. And it’s not my fault I don’t have any skills.” Her eyes sparkled as she gazed up at him. “It’s the way I grew up. Do you know, I don’t even drive? I mean, I have my license, but I never drove after getting it. The only thing I’m good at is putting together auction items. So, if I win the contest, I’ll start my own foundation and—” She watched him carefully. “Why do you look like a beetle just flew into your mouth and you swallowed it?”
“What? I don’t look like that.”
“Yes, you do.” Laughing, she reached for him, cupping his mouth. “You’re scowling at me. You think I’m a silly cow, don’t you?”
Just the opposite. “You’re up.” He tipped his chin toward the credit card terminal. “Pay.” As she swiped, he said, “I’m not scowling. I’m listening.”
“No, I get it. You’re horrified that I’m trying to get a charity to pay me for a job meant for volunteers.” Phinny took the receipt and rolled the cart out of the store. “Ugh. I know. I’m an awful person.”
“If I was scowling—which I wasn’t—it was because you said you have no marketable skills.” While he put her bags in the backseat, she returned the cart. Once they were both buckled up, he backed out. “You think the worst thing your parents did is cut you off, but I think it’s that they didn’t tell you enough good things about you.” He headed out of the lot. She’d gone quiet, so before turning onto 191, he braked and looked at her. “What’s wrong?”
She did it again. She put her hand on his arm. It was such a gentle touch, it made him ache. “Are you serious?”
“Serious about what?
“What you said, that my parents didn’t tell me enough good things about me?”
He pulled into the stream of traffic. “Dead serious.”
“Says the elite hockey player.” But she had a very satisfied expression.
And it made him feel good. Damn, he didn’t really like the power this woman had over him. “Some people take a linear path. Like me and my friends. We knew what we wanted, and we worked our asses off to get it. Other people—like you—don’t have a clear idea what they want to do, but that doesn’t mean they’re talentless bums.”
“True. But I’ve been on my own for nearly a year, and I’m still waiting tables.”
“You’re trying to get a job with a foundation.” Why that made her uncomfortable, he had no idea. “Look, what if I told you I’ve got no marketable skills because I’ve never played professional hockey. And because of that, I’ve been coaching for free. If I said I was embarrassed to ask the team to pay me, what would you say?”
“Well, first, I’d say you absolutely have marketable skills. Whether or not you’ve played in the NHL, you’ve trained for this sport all your life.”
“Exactly. You’ve never seen me play, but you know without a doubt, I have them. And because of that, you’d tell me I should absolutely be paid for my hard work.”
“Yes” She looked chastised. “Point taken.”
He nodded. “So, try talking to yourself the same way you’d talk to a friend.”
Kicking off her shoes, she lifted her feet to the dashboard, clasping her hands in her lap. “I like that very much.” She flashed him a grin so gorgeous, so blinding, he had to look away. “Thank you.”
Yeah, he really didn’t fucking like the power she had over him.
With her internal clock still messed up, Phinny couldn’t sleep. She’d gone downstairs to rummage around the pantry. Now, with a box of crackers in her hands, she set off to wander around the house.
When she’d been little, this place had been filled with antiques. Not that she remembered, but Kurt would send her pictures after she’d gone home. She’d made her mum print a few of them out, and she kept them tucked inside a book on her nightstand.
While she recognized some of the pieces, the décor looked different. Modern accents had been added. She stood before a subtle but powerfully evocative painting of a red-roofed barn set in the middle of a grassy field. Stormy skies lent an edge of threat—not all is peaceful on this land.
In town this morning, she’d seen signs for an annual summer art festival. Had he bought it at an event like that? Had she been with him? She’d only visited him in the summer, so maybe he’d bought her an ice cream cone as they’d wandered around. Her mum loved to say that he’d only wanted to fish and camp, the kinds of things a little girl would hate. She called him a narcissist, but Phinny wasn’t getting that impression from the people she’d met so far.
When the eulogist had said No one liked Kurt Grevers, a rush of justification had come flooding in. See, it’s not just me who thinks he’s an ass. But then he’d gone on to say how everyone respected and admired him, and it had just confused her.
No, that’s not what I felt.
She’d been ashamed. Because she was his daughter, and she was the only one in the chapel not moved to tears. And she was just now beginning to see that she didn’t know Kurt at all. She knew what her mum had told her about him.