Crashing against the corner of the building, I fall to pieces, sliding to the ground on my butt, not even feeling the rough asphalt underneath me. I’m so cold, and I can’t breathe. I double over, dry heaving as my stomach attempts to expel its contents. Nothing comes out except bile and a strangled kind of howl that sounds like an animal in pain.
Huge wracking sobs are birthed straight from my soul, and I know I need to get out of here, but I can’t force my limbs to move. I gasp and cry and scream as all pent-up emotions flow through me. My surroundings disappear as I give in to the darkness emanating from deep within me while it threatens to swallow me whole.
“Kendall, sweetheart. Look at me.” A cold hand touches my cheek, and I flinch.
Swiping at my blurry eyes, I focus on the figure crouched in front of me.
“You’re scaring me, sweetheart,” Jimmy says. “Should I get Vander?”
“No!” The word erupts from my mouth as my eyes widen in alarm. “No.” I shake my head and try to compose myself.
Jimmy says nothing as he hands me a tissue and watches while I dab at my eyes and try to resemble something human. “What’s going on?” he asks, extending his hand and pulling me to my feet.
Yanking my hand back, I wrap my arms around my torso as if that will ward off the chill penetrating every molecule of my body. My lower lip wobbles as I caution myself to get a grip. “I’m glad I bumped into you,” I say, wincing at the hoarse sound of my voice. “I need you to do something for me.”
He nods, encouraging me to go on with a concerned expression on his face. “Vander and I broke up.” Tears pool in my eyes again, and I want to attach a suction to my eye ducts until all the tears are sucked dry.
“I know he wouldn’t do that, and you’re clearly distraught, so why did this happen, Kendall?”
“I can’t tell you.” My head whips around, my eyes scanning the area for evidence of any cameras or spies. I wouldn’t put it past that asshole to have sicced his PI on me again.
“Are you in trouble?”
Am I? I honestly don’t know. What I do know is if I tell Jimmy anything he could die. I won’t take risks with his life or anyone’s. “Vander can never know about this. You didn’t see me here.”
“Let me help. Just tell me—”
I shake my head. “I can’t, but you can help. Vander is going to tell you what’s happened, and you’re going to sympathize with him and support him, but under no circumstances are you to tell him to fight for me, or come after me, or read anything more into it.”
His brow puckers, and I reach out, taking a hold of his hand. “Do you believe I love Vander? Do you believe in the connection we share?”
“Without a shadow of a doubt.”
“Then trust me when I say I’m doing this because I love him so much I would break his heart—and mine—if it means I get to save him.”
Slowly, he nods. “Are you sure I can’t help?”
I shake my head again. “I’ve done the best I can, but it all hinges on Vander staying away from me. I need you to promise me you’ll do whatever you can to ensure that happens. Promise me, Jimmy.” I tighten my grip on his hand.
“I promise, Kendall.”
A layer of stress lifts from my shoulders. “Look out for him, please. Remind him who he is, and make sure he doesn’t lose himself or lose focus of his goals. I don’t want this to derail his future, or else, it’ll all have been in vain.”
“You know I will.”
I press a kiss to his cheek. “You’re a good man, Jimmy. Thank you for caring about him and for not asking questions I can’t give you answers to.”
“He won’t take this well.”
“I know.” How I manage to smile through my tears is unfathomable. “I don’t know how I can go on without him, but this is how it has to be, for now.”
“Aw, sweetheart.” When he pulls me into a hug, I collapse against him, dissolving into tears again as I soak his shirt. When I ease back, he hands me a fresh tissue.
I blow my nose and wipe my damp face. “Two more things. Greg knows where Diana is. You need to find a way of telling Vander so he can warn her. And there is a camera somewhere in his apartment.” I hate that Greg will see the devastation he has wrought with his game playing, but that is the last time he will spy on his son. “Don’t tell Vander. Just find it and destroy it.”
He bobs his head. “Consider it done.”
“Thanks, Jimmy.” I give him a quick hug before I make my way to my SUV.
“Kendall, you mind yourself, and trust that I’ll look after our boy.”
“Thanks, Jimmy. That means a lot to me.”
I stay parked a few blocks from my house for hours, giving in to my grief and my loss, until I’m exhausted and physically incapable of shedding any more tears. Then I call Greg and scream abuse at him down the phone.
“Are you done?” he says when I pause to draw a breath.
“Not even close,” I snarl, already conjuring up ways of ending the bastard.
“This needed to happen to ensure you followed through with it.”
“The hell it did! I was going there to break off our relationship. You didn’t have to do that! You lied to me. You’ve already reneged on our deal. How the fuck can I ever trust you?”
“You can’t. Just like I can’t trust you. That’s the only way this deal works, but I give you my word I won’t do anything else. I will stick to my end of the bargain as long as you do what you said and stay away from my son.”
“Your word means jack shit after what you’ve just done.”
“You should be thanking me!” he yells. “I made that easy on you. He hates you now, and he won’t come looking for you.”
“Don’t pretend like you were doing me any favors. You did that for you.”
He chuckles, and I have an urge to slam my face repeatedly into the wheel. “I might have done that for the entertainment value, but it definitely killed two birds with one stone. Did you see his face when you told him it was true?” His vile laughter has me reconsidering my plans, and I’m close to buying a gun and putting a bullet in his skull. “You broke his little heart, and now he’s drowning his sorrows in beer and weed, and I’m betting it won’t take him long to sink his dick into some young pussy.”
I squeeze my eyes tight as the horrid visual dances before my mind’s eye. I’m guessing that was the intent.
“Curtis got a kick out of it too.”
I’m sure he did, but I couldn’t care less about him now. “You’re a horrible human, and one day you’ll get what’s coming to you. Karma is going to bite your ass big-time.”
“Stop your sniveling, Kendall, and woman up. Quit getting on my case. Go home, pack your shit, and leave this fucking town. If there’s one thing I agree on with my son, it’s that I never want to see your face again.”
46
VANDER
I spend the weekend in a dazed state of numbness, but it does nothing to diminish the anger searing through my veins like molten lava. The only time I sleep is when I pass out, stoned or drunk or a combination of the two. Every other time I close my eyes, all I see is my dad fucking Kendall, and I want to murder him in cold blood.