Mission accomplished, Dad. You sick predatory fuck.
I slam my fists into the bag, imagining it’s Dad’s face. I can’t bring myself to imagine it’s Kendall even though I’m furious and disappointed in her.
The front doors crash open, banging against the wall, and in an angry voice, someone shouts, “Where is he?”
Grabbing the bag, I steady it as I rip off my gloves and walk toward my buddy. “What’s wrong?”
West storms across the room, like a deadly tornado hell-bent on mass destruction, and rams his fist into my face. I stagger back, caught off guard by the punch and the look of rage on his face. There can be only one reason for that look, so I don’t retreat when he swings at me again. “You fucking bastard! How could you?! She’s my mom, you sick fuck.”
I stand rooted to the spot as he throws several more punches at my face and upper body. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Crusher, Boner, and Jimmy approaching, but I shake my head, cautioning them to hold back.
I don’t retaliate. I let West vent his anger on my face and my body. He isn’t a trained fighter like me, and though his punches lack strength, they still hurt.
“Let’s go to my place and talk about this,” I say when he’s stopped using me for target practice.
He stands before me, panting and red in the face, his fists clenching and unclenching. “I’m not going anywhere with you, you stupid prick. We’ll do this here.” He shoves my shoulders. “This is why you’ve been on a rampage these past few days? Because you’re moping over my mother?” He grabs fistfuls of his hair and lets out a strangled roar. “How could you let me console you? How could you fuck my mother?” He lands a sturdy punch to my solar plexus, but I don’t make a sound, almost welcoming the pain, because it was shitty of me. “You fucked my mother. Jesus, do you even realize how fucking wrong that is? She’s old enough to be your mother!” He punches me in the nose, and blood spurts from my nostrils.
Jimmy inches in between us. “I think that’s enough. Take this to my office.”
“Screw you, Jimmy.” West’s nostrils flare, and he looks close to lashing out at Jimmy too.
“Leave us. This is between me and him.”
Jimmy eyeballs me. “You don’t have to take this.”
“I know.” We silently communicate and he nods, grabbing Crusher and Boner and stepping out of the main room, leaving West and me alone.
“How did you find out?” I ask.
One side of his mouth curls into a snarl. “I got into an argument with my dad. I hit him.” His dry chuckle sounds louder in the empty room. “His way of hitting me back was to inform me you were having an affair with my mom.” His Adam’s apple jumps in his throat, and the anger retreats for a second, replaced with deep-seated hurt.
“I’m not going to apologize for being with her, only for going behind your back. We didn’t mean to hurt you. It’s one of the reasons we kept it a secret. The plan was to tell you after graduation. I see now we should’ve come clean at the start. We were wrong to hide it.”
“Ya think?” He glares at me before slumping to the ground with his back against the side of the ring. I sit beside him, biting back a wince as pain spreads across my ribs and stomach as I lower myself down. “I told you things about my parents’ marriage in confidence, and you used that to take advantage of my mother when she was vulnerable.” He rubs at his temples. “I knew you two were close, and it struck me as odd at times, but I figured she was the mother you never had.” Disgust washes over his face. “But that wasn’t it at all. You were preying on her, waiting to swoop in at the first opportunity and indulge whatever twisted mommy fantasies you harbor in that sick head of yours.”
“That’s not how it happened,” I coolly reply. “Or how I see her. I love her, West. She’s it for me.” It hurts to admit, but it’s still true.
He barks out another laugh. “Sure, you do. That’s why you had Gayle’s lips wrapped around your dick as soon as my mom came to her senses and dropped your manipulative ass.”
“That isn’t my finest moment. I was trashed and I regretted it instantly.” I feel sick thinking about it, but I was blinded by rage, and my senses were impaired. At the time, it felt like I was getting revenge on Kendall because I remember how jealous she was of Gayle at West’s party. But it was dumb, and all it did was make me feel worse. How ridiculous is it that I feel like I’ve betrayed Kendall when she was the one who cheated on me? We’re broken up now, and I’m free to fuck around with whomever I want. I have no reason to feel guilty, so why the fuck do I?
Because I can’t forget the connection we share even if she has.
“Whatever.” He climbs to his feet, and I stand. “I can’t believe you did this. I can’t believe I trusted you and you betrayed me like this. At a time when you know I’ve been struggling.” He shakes his head, and hurt mixes with fury on his face. “My parents might’ve saved their marriage if you hadn’t interfered. Did you ever think about that?”
I know I’m not the reason Kendall’s marriage ended in divorce. West knows that too. He knows exactly why they split up, but I guess it’s easier to paint me as the villain now. I say nothing, because I’m not going to argue with him. The truth is I have wronged him. If the tables were turned, and he was with my mom and they’d been lying to me for months, I’d be standing in his shoes, throwing punches, and lashing out with my words.
“You make me sick.” He glares at me. “Stay the hell away from my mom, and stay away from me.” He prods his finger in my chest. “You’re dead to me now, and I want nothing more to do with you.”
47
VANDER
I spent another restless night, tossing and turning on the couch, wondering how one part of my life has gone the way I wanted but the other has crumpled to shit. I suppose I should be grateful Dad is out of our lives, Mom is on the mend, and I’m getting to pursue a career in art. But it all feels so hollow because I have lost my best friend and the woman I love in the worst possible way.
I will never get over Kendall’s betrayal. Just like I know I’ll never be able to evict her from my heart. I’m destined to dwell in this dark, depressing space for the rest of my life, and it’s hard to feel excited for anything.
I can’t stay here now. There is nothing left for me in Colorado. I want away from this toxic environment, and it can’t wait until next month. I have enough credits to graduate early, so today will be my last day of high school. Then I’m heading home, packing my shit, and moving to be with Mom until it’s time to leave for Yale.
I’m a little late as I enter the school building, startled to find the hallway still so busy. Usually, at least some students would have started heading toward their classes by now. The raucous laughter dies down as I walk toward my locker, conscious of the hushed whispers and finger-pointing going on behind my back.
“Motherfucker,” some dickhead shouts at me as I pass by, and a chorus of laughter rings out.
All the blood drains from my face. What the actual fuck? Has West told people about us? I get him wanting to hurt me, but how could he do this to Kendall knowing it will damage her reputation and make her the subject of salacious gossip?