“Fran…France….”
“Who?” I ask in a panic.
“Francesca,” he whispers in pain.
I frown as the earth beneath me moves. “My sister?”
He nods.
No.
“What about her?”
His eyes close. “Trust…. I….”
“What about Francesca?” I cry, adrenaline is pumping hard through my veins. “Nicolai, don’t die,” I beg. “Tell me.”
His head drops, his eyes go blank as they stare into space.
He’s gone.
I sit back onto my heels, covered in blood. My heart banging hard against my chest.
What the hell was he going to say?
18
Francesca
I dial Anna’s number and wait as it rings.
“Hi, babe, I was just about to call you,” she answers.
“What are you up to?”
“We’re on our way back from Tuscany now.”
I smile broadly. “You went to Tuscany, that sounds romantic?”
“You have no idea.” She laughs. “Do you want to meet up for a late lunch?”
“Sounds good.”
“Okay, I’ll come over around two o’clock? I have so much to tell you.”
“Like what?” I hear Carlo say in the background. “What do you have to tell her?”
I imagine him driving as he listens to our conversation.
“How crap you are in bed,” she replies.
“You wish,” his voice growls.
I hear her laugh out loud and I know that he’s just pinched her on the leg or something.
I smile as I listen to them play, I love that she sounds so happy.
My door buzzer sounds and I frown, who would that be?
“Someone is at the door, I have to go.”
“Okay, see you soon.”
I hang up and answer the door, my mother walks straight past me and into the apartment.
Great.
“Hi, Mom.”
“Hello, darling.”
She’s wearing a camel-color fitted dress and sky-high heels, her hair is styled to perfection and as usual she looks like she just stepped off a designer photo shoot.
“How was church?” I ask.
“Good. I prayed for you.” She puts her handbag down on the kitchen counter and walks to my coffee machine.
“You don’t need to pray for me, Mom.”
“Yes, I do. After last night’s little brain snap on your behalf somebody has to.” She gets to making a cup of coffee. “Do you want one?”
“No thanks.” I cross my arms, annoyed. “Did you come here to fight with me? Because you needn’t bother, I’m already kind of pissed off with you about leaving last night without saying goodbye.”
She exhales heavily. “That was Lorenzo being dramatic. He walked out and I had to follow him.”
I frown as I stare at her. “Why would he walk out?”
“Because he’s not your father, Francesca. If he was, I would have told you long ago. How do you think that made him feel having that information slung at me across the table in front of him?”
“You were married to another man when he was sleeping with you, how should he fucking feel?” I snap, outraged.
“Listen to me.” She sips her coffee casually as if she has this conversation every day. “I know that you think that you know everything, but I can assure you. You have this wrong.”
“So, you never slept with Lorenzo before I was conceived?” I ask.
“I did. I admit it, I did.”
I roll my eyes in disgust. “Why are we even having this conversation?”
“Because the dates were way out. There is no way you are Lorenzo’s daughter and I would have dearly loved you to have been, he doesn’t have any children and loves you like you are his own. To give you to him would have been the ultimate gift of love.”
“So, you can tell me with one hundred percent certainty that I am not Lorenzo’s?”
She shrugs. “If you are.”
“So…there is an if?” I scoff.
“I’m just saying, if you were Lorenzo’s, that would mean that you were born at forty-two weeks’ gestation. You didn’t look like an overdue baby.”
I throw my hands up in disgust, “That’s your argument? I didn’t look like an overdue baby?” I shake my head. “Can you hear yourself right now? Give me a break.”
“It’s a fact.”
“No, Mom, this is the facts. You were sleeping with two men at the same time and I have just had a paternity test that proves I am not who you assumed I was.”
She tilts her chin upward in defiance. “Regardless, he is not the man for you.”
“I love him.”
“I don’t care. You cannot.”
“It’s a little too late for that, Mom. We fell in love long before Enrico died, long before we knew anything about Giuliano being related.”
“I know.” She holds her hands up in defeat. “Enrico predicted this mess when he caught the two of you in the library.”
“You knew about us that long ago?”
“Yes, and in hindsight I should have told you back then.”
I shake my head in disbelief. “You’re too late, we’re already in love and living together.”
Her face falls. “You can’t love a man like him, sweetheart.”
“Why not?”
“Because I loved a man just like him. His twin, in fact. And look how my life turned out.”
“Dad?”
She nods sadly and takes my hand in hers. “I know this doesn’t make sense to you now, darling, but I promise you from the bottom of my heart that I am telling the truth. Powerful men who look and love like Giuliano Ferrara will never be satisfied by one woman.”
For the first time I see my mother for what she really is…broken.
She really did love him.
“Everybody thinks that he and Angelina had this grand love story…and they did, there’s no denying it, he couldn’t stay away from her no matter how much he wanted to,” she says softly. “But there were other women too.”
“What?” I frown.
“He would tell me that he was working and tell Angelina that he was with me, but he would be out in clubs. Living the life of a crime boss, there were strippers, party girls, gambling and casinos. Gang bangs, orgies…you name it, he did it. And he did it well, every woman in Italy wanted him.”
I get a vision of that porno with Giuliano and those two girls and my heart sinks.
He loved it, he was in his glory in that threesome.
“And you can’t blame Giuliano for having those things…it comes with the territory. His men look up to him and I have no doubt that he loves you, my darling.” She smiles sadly as she runs her hand down my hair to try to soften her hurtful words. “But in time…he will stray. I can guarantee my life on it. And you will have his children and have no choice but to turn a blind eye to it, because the thought of living without him will kill you.”
I stare at her.
God.
“He will tell you he loves you and you will believe him. It is a long-drawn-out death of your own self-respect.”