Aspyn: Do I really want to know?
Troy: I meant what I said about your butt. Hope that doesn’t offend you.
Aspyn: Offend me? No. But you can be sure that you will never see those Goofy scrubs again, Serrano. I may just have to burn them now that I know Goofy looks like he’s laughing when I walk. WTF?
Troy: Damn. I shouldn’t have said anything. Totally messed that up for myself.
Aspyn: That’s right, you did.
Troy: LOL. This is all in good fun. I don’t want you to hate me, Aspyn.
Aspyn: I never said I hated you. You’ve assumed that this whole time. But I never said that.
There was a pause in our interactions for a few minutes. Then he sent another text. But this one was different.
Troy: For some reason, it’s important to me to make things right with you. Like maybe you getting assigned to accompany me out with Nonno happened for a reason. It’s my chance to do something I never would have had the opportunity to do—make amends with someone I hurt in the past.
Aspyn: You owe me no charity, Troy. But I appreciate the sentiment.
Troy: It’s not charity. It’s more like CLARITY. I can see more clearly now the wrongs of my past. And I want to show you who I really am. Or who I think I am.
I sighed. We were both at fault for how we’d acted in high school.
Aspyn: Look, it took two to tango. I was no saint, either. So let’s move past it.
But he wouldn’t let up.
Troy: In order for you to believe I’ve changed, I need to prove I’m a better person than I was back then.
Aspyn: That’s not necessary.
Troy: It’s important to me.
Troy: Seriously. Let’s be friends.
Aspyn: What does that entail?
Troy: We can hang out sometime. Like grab a drink after the outings with Nonno.
I needed to be friends with Troy like I needed a hole in the head. But the thought of grabbing a drink with him sent an odd wave of excitement through me. And that was exactly why I had to nip this right in the bud.
I typed the response out fast, before I could change my mind.
Aspyn: I don’t think so.
Troy
The interesting thing about this whole situation was how much I loved arguing with Aspyn Dumont. I couldn’t remember a single thing I’d enjoyed more in recent years. She might not want anything to do with hanging out with me, but unfortunately for her, I could be very persistent.
Troy: I’m not above begging.
There was no response for the longest time. Damn. Had I lost her?
I sat there staring at the phone while my dad’s cat, Patrick, climbed behind my neck and purred. Well, I guess this little show is over. I must have scared her away. Just when I was about to close out, she sent another message.
Game on again.
Aspyn: I tried my hand at redoing your bio as well. Here you go:
Troy, 29: Run! Don’t walk. I might look like a smiling, confident barrel of fun, but in fact, I wouldn’t know how to keep my dick in my pants if my life depended on it. If you choose to continue because you’re mesmerized by my annoyingly handsome face, you can expect me to be a judgmental asshole at times, always with a modicum of snark. I’m good for not only financial advisement (which is probably all wrong), but other unsolicited advice as well. Basically, if it’s none of my business, you can expect to hear from me. I’ll be the first to tell you to get a life. Meanwhile, I’m so trustworthy that I can’t even take my grandfather out in public without losing him—twice.
After I stopped laughing, I typed out a response.
Troy: Damn.
Aspyn: LOL. I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself. Don’t forget you declared this “all in good fun.”
Troy: I love how you snuck that last part in about my grandfather even though you’re just as much at fault.
Aspyn: I know. I debated leaving it out for that reason.
Troy: But wait…back up. Annoyingly handsome? I think I just got my first compliment from you. Let’s talk about that.
Aspyn: Let’s not.
Troy: I guess we’re even now. You called me annoyingly handsome. And I said you have a nice ass.
Aspyn: Does that conclude this conversation, then?
Troy: You can’t wait to get rid of me, can you? Just like that night I dropped off your phone. The door practically hit me on the way out.
Aspyn: Sorry. You caught me off guard that night.
Troy: YOU were caught off guard? My crotch got caught up in a tsunami.
Aspyn: LOL
Troy: I’m glad you find it funny. My friend thought I’d pissed myself when I met him for dinner after.
Troy: By the way, bring your sneakers on Tuesday.
Aspyn: Why?
Troy: You’ll find out.
Aspyn: Should I be concerned?
Troy: Nah.
Aspyn: Give me a hint.
Troy: Pretty sure it will be the only time this week you’ll have balls flying in your face.
I immediately regretted that joke. It might have been too much. But it was the first thing that came to mind. Whoops.
Aspyn: Seriously?
Troy: You asked for a hint! I gave it to you.
Aspyn and I continued our back-and-forth for the better part of an hour before she announced that she needed to go wash off some face mask. I asked her to send me a photo of herself with the mask on, and she told me to go to hell.
I grabbed my old Michael Myers mask and sent her a photo of myself in it. It was hard to tell, but I think she thought it was funny.
After we stopped texting, I was revved up. You would have thought I’d had a ton of caffeine or something. I couldn’t sleep at all. Instead, I kept having imaginary arguments with her in my head. Not the usual way a woman kept me up.
• • •
The following Tuesday, Aspyn showed up to Nonno’s room wearing solid black scrubs with no pattern. I couldn’t help laughing. She must’ve picked the darkest, plainest scrubs she owned because of the laughing Goofy comment I’d made. This was a protest, and I heard it loud and clear. Lucky for me, though, the black scrubs still hugged her derriere quite beautifully.
“So, will you tell me where we’re going now?” she asked.
Nonno beamed and answered before I had a chance. “We’re going to play basketball!”
She grinned. “Oh. Cool. I didn’t know you played basketball, Mr. Serrano.”
“Well, Troy and I used to play back when I could walk around easily. I’ve missed it. It was his idea to try it again. We’ll have to see.”
She looked over at me. “I think this is a fantastic idea.”