He shut his eyes tightly as his mouth dropped open. His body shook under me as we came together.
Wow.
Every time with Troy was better than the last.
Utterly sated, I collapsed onto him. He kissed my head softly. I almost wished he didn’t do stuff like that, because whenever he was gentle with me, it made me want…more. And I knew I couldn’t set that expectation.
He slipped out from under me to discard the condom before returning to the bed. He pulled me back over to lie on top of him again. Resting my head on his chest, I felt his heartbeat thundering against my cheek. I didn’t want to leave. I had no idea whether he planned to take me home or what, but I knew I was happy here. And I wanted to stay the night. But I wasn’t going to be the first person to suggest that.
A minute later, I felt something heavy land on my back. I flinched, and it took me a bit to realize it was Patrick.
“Shit. I’m sorry,” Troy said. “I’ll get him off.”
“No.” I laughed. “It’s okay. He can stay.”
“You’re okay with him on your back? He might never get up, you know.”
“Yeah, it’s fine. It kind of feels…nice. The purring vibration. He’s sort of like a weighted blanket.”
He flashed a beautiful smile, and that was the last thing I remembered as I drifted off to sleep—on top of Troy with a cat on my back. Kind of an odd threesome, if you ask me.
• • •
The following day, after we’d finally rolled out of bed after all the sex we had again this morning, Troy and I went out for a nice breakfast in Meadowbrook Center. While we waited for our food, he showed me some photos his dad had sent from Europe. I vowed to save enough money to take my own trip overseas someday. Staying in Meadowbrook was one thing, but never getting to experience the world at all wasn’t an option.
The cool September breeze was a welcome addition to our outdoor meal. It really didn’t get any better than this.
After breakfast, he came back to my place, and we chilled for a bit in my yard. It was the epitome of a lazy Saturday. Neither one of us acknowledged that all this time we were spending together was a clear violation of the sex-with-no-strings precedent we’d discussed early on. And I certainly wasn’t going to acknowledge that the way Troy looked at me all day today made my heart do crazy stuff.
At one point, I left the yard to go inside and make us coffees. Even though I’d told him to wait outside, Troy must have gotten antsy because he soon joined me in the kitchen.
He placed my phone next to me on the counter. “You got a message.”
“I did?”
“Your phone lit up outside. I looked over at it because I thought it was mine. We have the same notification sound, apparently. You got a message through the app.”
He was referring to the dating app. My stomach sank as I looked down and saw a message from a guy I’d chatted with earlier this week.
Sorry for the delay in responding. I was offline to take care of some family stuff. Would you want to meet up for drinks tonight?
Shit. I’d gotten a message this past Thursday from a guy I’d matched with before Troy and I first hooked up. I’d casually responded, though I had no intention of meeting up with him now. But I could understand how this looked—like I was actively pursuing someone else. Not that Troy and I had any kind of formal exclusivity agreement, but it was still sucky that he had to see this, especially when it didn’t mean anything. I’d just responded to the guy so as not to be rude.
His tone was bitter. “Maybe you should meet him.”
“I don’t want to meet him.”
“But you were chatting with him. Why would you be chatting with him if you didn’t intend to meet him?” His nostrils flared. “What’s the point?”
“He and I matched before you and I started this…thing. We messaged briefly this past week, but nothing came of it, nor had I planned for anything to happen with him.”
Troy just kept nodding and looked away. “Wow.”
“What?”
“I don’t like how I reacted just now.” He shook his head, seeming dazed. “Like a fucking jealous bastard.” His expression was sincere. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair. I don’t know what came over me. I shouldn’t have been upset at you. We’re not exclusive, right? I have no right to question anything.”
“It’s okay,” I assured him. “I would’ve felt the same way if the roles were reversed.”
Troy blinked, not seeming to have absorbed what I’d just said. “You know what?” He walked over to the end table by the front door and grabbed his keys. “I’m gonna take a drive.”
My eyes widened. “Where are you going?”
“Just for a ride.” He opened the door. “I’ll be back.”
He exited faster than I could even think to try to stop him. When the door shut behind him, the silence was deafening.
Feeling terrible, I didn’t quite know what to do with myself after he left. I kept wondering what the hell was going on in his head and what had compelled him to leave so suddenly. Was he that upset that I’d been chatting with another guy? Or was there something more to his reaction?
Two hours passed, and Troy still hadn’t returned. I must have cleaned my house three times over in an attempt to calm my nerves. I wasn’t sure if he was ever coming back.
At nearly 5 PM, I’d almost given up hope of his return when the doorbell rang.
I rushed to the door and opened it.
With his hands in his pockets, Troy flashed a hesitant smile. “Hey…”
“I was beginning to think you weren’t coming back.” I moved out of the way to let him in.
“I took a long drive,” he said.
“For two hours?”
“Yup.”
“Where did you go?”
“Nowhere really. I took back roads, traveling south. Listened to music.”
I pulled at the material of his shirt. “Troy, look—”
“No…” he interrupted, placing his hand over mine. “You don’t owe me any explanation, Aspyn. Forget anything you planned to say to me when I came back. I’m the one who needs to explain.” He inched closer so that he was right in front of me. “I was caught off guard by my reaction to that guy texting you. It made me realize that my feelings for you are stronger than I’d thought. I was overwhelmed by that and didn’t know how to express what I was feeling, so I left to clear my head.”
My heart pounded against my chest. “Did it help?”
“Somewhat.” He cupped my cheek. “Aspyn, I don’t know what’s going on between us or where it’s leading. But I do know that the thought of you with someone else right now makes me sick to my stomach.”
I swallowed. “Noted.”
“I needed to make sure I understood myself before I came back here to explain. The more I drove, the clearer it became.” He spoke over my lips. “I don’t want to share.”
His mouth enveloped mine. My legs felt weak as my body melted into his. He grabbed my ass and squeezed it hard, almost possessively, as our tongues collided. I reached up and ran my hands through his silky hair, relishing his taste, and once again wondering what the hell I was supposed to do about my undeniable feelings for this man.