Ryder slid his hand around my back and folded me into his side. His lips grazed over my head, and he drew in a deep inhale before stepping away from the wall with me. Everyone who had been in Ryder’s office had followed us out into the hallway, quietly offering us their support. I tried to give them a reassuring smile, but I ended up whimpering in pain as another wave of cramps rippled over my abdomen.
I let Ryder support my weight while we proceeded through the corridor at a slow pace. His wings erupted from his back, curving a gossamer softness around me and caressing my exposed shoulder. My arm lifted, and the wing slipped beneath it, adding support for the walk to the infirmary.
The next contraction dropped me to the floor—or, it would have if Ryder hadn’t lifted me into his arms. Ryder didn’t wait for me to adjust before he started at a hasty speed through the hallways. My heart felt like a fist pounding inside my chest, creating a vibration and mixing fear and excitement.
“Breathe,” he rumbled against my ear.
“I am.” I groaned, but the pain was splitting through my abdomen and shooting downward. “It didn’t feel like this last time.”
“You were being tortured last time,” he returned evenly, as if it were the ideal point to mention. “Everything will be okay, Pet. You’re a fighter, and this time, I’m here with you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
“I’m giving birth, not dying. Women have been doing it since the dawn of time, so you should probably keep all references to torture and assurance that I won’t die to yourself. Don’t worry, if you faint, I’ll be sure to catch you and our son if he comes out while I’m catching your ogre ass.”
Chapter Eighteen
Inside the infirmary, Ryder sat me on the bed, and before I could warn him off it, he’d once again threatened to murder everyone inside the room. Then he started pacing, and he hadn’t stopped since. His hair was a mess from being yanked while he fought to keep his sanity. Every contraction sent him into an uproar of terror, which caused everyone who lingered on the other side of the curtains endless amusement.
“Ryder,” I whispered between bouts of agonizing pain, smiling weakly as he paused, wide golden eyes colliding with mine.
“Is it time?” he snapped before he turned to bellow out more profanity and orders. “Tell me what you need, and it’s done. I’ll slaughter the pricks, all of them, for not easing the pain.”
I snorted before rolling my eyes. “Right now, I need you to calm the fuck down and sit beside me. They can’t stop the pain any more than you can. Threatening them with torture and death will not make this go faster.” I paused as the next contraction began, rolling through me until I gasped and expelled a soft cry of discomfort. “They can’t prevent the pain. It’s what happens when you’re trying to push out a babe,” I informed through gritted teeth.
“They could at least fucking do something!” he snarled, collapsing onto the single chair left in the room.
He’d smashed the others hours ago, along with anything else that wasn’t in use.
“Do you have any idea what can go wrong? I do, remember? Last time, I watched Ristan cutting you open to reach in and remove our children. I watched you fucking die! Fuck, I wish Eliran were here,” he muttered, grasping my hand and holding it against his lips.
“I wish he was, too, because he’d have told you to get your shit under control. He also wouldn’t be hiding beneath the exam table because you threatened to skin him and eat him alive if he didn’t do something like any one of his protégés currently are.” His eyes narrowed, and he chuckled before kissing my knuckles again. “Plus, I’m fine and not dying. I’m a goddess, remember?”
His dark head bobbed before he watched my face tightening to endure the next contraction. Pressure built in my bottom, and I groaned. I slipped my free hand between my thighs and blanched. When I tried to prop myself up, I ended up whimpering and arching instead because the strongest contraction yet shot through me.
Ryder released my hand and rose, helping me sit up. I exhaled slowly, breathing in through my nose as the lancing pain that stabbed through me, shooting around my center. Spasms started, and I shuddered from the intensity of pain that lingered while pushing against my pelvis.
“Fucking hell,” I cried through gritted teeth, urging my body to press against the ache and strain the pressure created.
“They’re getting closer together,” he reported, pacing aimlessly beside my bed without letting go of my hand. Every single noise I made had him driving his focus from me to the curtain separating us from the crowd of people waiting for the babe to be born. He stabbed his fingers through his mane and drove the air out from his lungs noisily.
The next contraction drifted to the end of the one before it, and I bore down, growling with the need to drive the babe out to end the agony. Fluid gushed from my body, drenching the bed, but I continued pushing and bearing down. Finally, a lull in contractions provided time to slip my fingers over my entrance, identifying the soft skull of the babe crowning, ready to be brought into the world.
“Ryder,” I murmured, not wishing the healers to overhear my words. “I need the blanket and incubator to be closer to the bed.” His eyes widened, and he started toward the curtain to snap orders, but I tugged him back.
“What?” he asked with horror on his face.
“Stop, it isn’t time for them right now. This is us, right? We’re a team, and right now, I only want you inside this room. Push the incubator closer and come sit with me.” I gritted my teeth through the next contraction, struggling to delay until he’d finished grabbing the items I asked for.
“You’ve lost your damn mind, woman. No. Absolutely not happening. That’s not how you do this. There’s a chain of events to make this go smoothly. You push, I stand here ripping my hair out, and they catch. End of fucking chain.”
“One, fuck your chain. Two, get the damn incubator, and blankets ready. Three, if it goes sideways, you can scream, and they will be here in seconds to help if you don’t scare them to death.”
“It can’t go sideways. That’s not possible. Is it?” His lips opened, and then closed as a look of horror mixed with confusion.
“I’m not talking about the baby going sideways,” I snorted through the tensing of my abdomen and the shooting pain firing up my spine. “I mean if anything goes wrong.”
Ryder shoved his fingers through his hair, eyeing me, and then slid his whiskey-colored stare to the items set aside. He exhaled before dropping his head. His entire profile was the mirror image of agony, and fear grasping him in their clutches.
“Look at me, Ryder,” I pleaded, watching those intense eyes open only after he’d lifted his dark raven colored head. “I’m not weak or hurt this time. I won’t leave this world that easily. I won’t leave you, my beast. I promise you, we can do this together. You and I? We can handle anything this world throws at us. This is a cakewalk.”
Once he had, I smirked at the consternation on his face. Ryder never lost control or panicked. He got violent. He got unruly. He lost his shit for a few moments, and then he reined it in, and handled business. He held out the blanket, and I shook my head while he glided his concern to my knees, which were parted and lifted.