It was a struggle, but finally, I opened my eyes, and they were dry. I didn't know where I would go, but all I knew was that I wanted away from Kaden and this whole thing.
I started walking, and I didn't realize where my feet were taking me until I stopped in front of Jordan's door. I hadn't made the conscious choice to come here. If anything, I would have rather stayed away, gone somewhere else completely. Jordan wasn't someone I should be seeing when I was so emotional. He could use it against me.
Jordan looked up when I entered, surprised. “What are you doing here?” he asked as he sat at the table, eating some lunch. "This isn't your normal time." He studied me closely. "What happened? Are you okay?"
"The Leos attacked us," I said, my voice shaking a little. I sank into the chair opposite him. "You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"
He snorted. "You think I had something to do with it? I've been trapped in here for days. Or are we at weeks now?"
I blew out a long breath, centering myself. "No, I don't think you did."
Jordan relaxed a little at my admission and his eyes ran over me but with concern instead of desire this time. "You're injured."
"I'm fine," I snapped, then rubbed my face. I shouldn't take this out on Jordan. For once, he wasn't to blame.
"Obviously not." He tilted his head as he studied me. "Why are you here?"
“I don't know,” I said truthfully. “I just…wanted to talk to you.”
He let out a harsh laugh. "Now I know you're not thinking right. You must have hit your head or something during the attack."
“Kaden and I fought,” I admitted. Jordan raised his eyebrows, and before he could open his mouth and say something that would make me regret coming in to talk to him, I continued. “He killed several Leos in cold blood after we'd already knocked them out. I wanted to take them as hostages, but he just killed them."
Jordan's face was grim as he digested the news. "Brutal and efficient. Sounds like something I would do. Did any of them survive?"
"No."
"I'm surprised you care so much about the Leos,” he said, leaning back and appraising me. “I thought you'd want to see them all dead after everything that happened."
“No one should be killed like that,” I said. "Besides, they would have been more helpful as prisoners that we could interrogate. We need to know what the Sun Witches and Leos are planning, and so far, you haven't been much help. Unless you're willing to finally talk..."
"At this point, I have no idea what they're planning any more than you do," Jordan said.
"Why do I not believe that?" I sighed and pinched my brow. "I'm trying to convince everyone that the Sun Witches are the real enemy, not the Leos. If you would only help me, we might be able to stop this useless pack war before it gets worse. We need to take the fight to the Sun Witches already."
Suddenly Jordan's hand clasped around my wrist. "Stay away from the Sun Witches."
I jerked back, but his hold was steady, persistent. "What?" I asked, startled. I'd never seen him look so serious before.
"Ayla, I'm serious. You have no idea what they can do."
I tried to yank my arm out from his grip, but it was impossible with how strong he was. I was only half shifter and couldn't even compete with one of the strongest alphas alive. "Let go of me."
He did, uncurling one finger at a time before leaning back in his chair. His previous nonchalant attitude returned, but there was an undercurrent left in the air, something that spoke of danger and persistence.
"I have some idea of what they can do," I said as I rubbed my wrist.
Jordan shook his head, and let out a puff of air that could have been a laugh under different circumstances. “No, you don't. They get in your head. Twist things around, make you do things…” he trailed off and slammed his mouth shut. It was almost as if he wanted to say more, but couldn't.
Celeste had told me the Sun Witches could get in your head, and had taught me how to protect against it—was that what Jordan was talking about? Had they used such power on him before? My brain raced, going over every incident we'd had, wondering how much of it was him, and how much was the Sun Witches. "Did they make you do things?"
"Of course not," he snapped.
"Jordan, you can tell me, and maybe I can help—"
"I don't need your help. What are you even doing here?" He shoved back from the table so hard it slammed against me and nearly knocked my chair over. “Stay the fuck away from me."
I stood up and stepped toward the door. Maybe it was a mistake that I'd come here. Maybe I should have just gone for a walk instead. But I supposed I'd thought Jordan needed to know what was going on, and hoped I could get something useful out of him in return. I should have known it would be pointless.
No. I had learned something, and Jordan was working hard to push me away from him, which meant that I was getting somewhere. I couldn't give up now. I turned back to him.
“Please,” I said. “Help me end this war with your pack and turn the battle onto the real enemy. You obviously know that the Sun Witches are evil. You just admitted as much.”
Jordan stared at me, jaw clenched, eyes unreadable, but didn't answer.
“At least help me get a Sun Witch so we can remove the mate bond," I said.
Still no response. He was being so stubborn, and it was at his own expense.
I tried a different tactic. "The November full moon is coming up. What will you do when you go into heat?" I knew how awful it would be for him to still have the mating bond between us while he was in heat. Even in its dampened state, he would struggle, probably until he hurt himself, and I didn't know what would happen to me either. “It's not like you can just ignore it.” Trust me, I know, I added silently, grimacing at the reminder of the utter need that had overtaken me, utterly uncontrollable and insatiable until the moon had gone down.
“I want the bond broken just as much as you do, trust me,” Jordan growled. “But the Sun Witches are too powerful. They—" He stopped and grimaced again, and when he looked back at me his eyes hardened once more. “A pack war is inevitable, and you and I? We're not friends. We're not siblings. We're not mates. We're enemies. Nothing more, nothing less. No matter how much you try to convince yourself otherwise every time you come here and play cards with me. Now get out."
His words stung, even though I didn't really believe that he meant them. He was trying to push me away as a defensive tactic, to prevent me from learning anything. I couldn't let him get to me, even when I was already feeling bruised to my core.
“Say whatever you want,” I said. “But I know there's something you're hiding, something about the Sun Witches. I'll get you to spill it eventually.”
I walked out, anger simmering in my chest at both the alphas in my life. They were so damn stubborn, both of them convinced they were always right—but then again, so was I. And I wasn't going to let either of them push me around.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE