“What are you up to?” I have no idea why he’d be asking me that, seeing as all I was doing at the moment was sitting quietly in a corner watching the girls at play.
“What is it that you think I’m up to?”
“You forget I know you? You’ve got that look in your eye.”
“What look, you clown?”
“Your Pop’s worried about you?”
“Why the heck would he be worried about me?”
“How would I know? You two and your double speak make me mental. Just tell me you’re not about to do something stupid and put my mind at rest.”
“I’m not about to do something stupid.”
He got his answer, but it didn’t seem to be enough since he stayed staring at the side of my head. “Maybe we should go grab Pop, do something with him.” I offered.
“Yeah?” He smiled big. He’s so easy.
“Why not? The women are about to descend any minute, and you know what that means.”
We could hear the sound of voices approaching which meant the women were about to go into another one of their everything ball marathons. I have absolutely no interest in living through that again, and Gianna doesn’t need me since she’d be surrounded, so it was as good a time as any to put Pop’s mind at ease.
I have every intention of sharing some of what I find with him, but not until I’m ready. After that trip, there’d be no point in pretending that I’m not involved, and he’d no longer have to skirt around the fact that he knows that I know the truth. I’ve only kept it up this long because it served my purpose, but that’s now coming to an end.
I said a rather comical goodbye to Gianna, which made her laugh and eased some of the rough edges around my heart, before leaving to go see the other being that I worry about the most.
DRACO
I watched Lance for any signs when the two of them walked into the room. His dismissive shrug didn’t exactly make me breathe easy, but it was better than I expected. I was beginning to think that I was on the wrong track after receiving the call I just did from my lawyer. Maybe Fontane and his woman were all Gabe was thinking about after all.
I’m dying to ask the kid what exactly he’d done to put that sound of awe in the attorney's voice, but of course, I won’t be doing that in front of witnesses and especially not Lance. As close as they are, Gabe has always made it a point not to discuss certain things in front of his chosen brother because of Lance’s interest in joining the force at some point.
Even now, he thinks about the impact it would have on his brother’s future. Gotta love that kid. If he could just stay in Machiavellian mode and ease off the Sun Tzu, I wouldn’t worry so much. If he was going with The Prince, then he wouldn’t give a fuck about any damage he’s about to do. He’d just do his thing and move on to the next until the day he dies, somewhere in the distant future.
But with the Sun Tzu and Confucius leanings, things might get a bit sticky, which is what I’ve always been worried about. I’m not sure which code of honor he’s going to go with in the end. Too damn smart for his own good sure, but it’s his innate sense of justice that has me on my toes. He’s like a mix of Bruce Lee and Sonny Corleone; you’d have to see it.
On top of that, I’m worried about the fallout from his mother. If losing him would gut me, it’ll kill my Sofia. But I can’t get ahead of this thing because I don’t have the first clue as to what he’s up to. The little shit hasn’t given anything away, not even a hint. I’m trying to remember if I was that good at his age, and I don’t see it.
This kid, who’d been unwanted by my parents before he was even born, had grown to win them over to the point Pop would take a bullet for him. His grandmother gives him her blessing every morning, whether over the phone or when we’re together, with a kiss on his brow. She worries about him, prays for him, everything she did for Garrett and me.
His sisters worship him, and that’s no cliché. Even without knowing the circumstances of his conception, they seem to have some sixth sense that he needs more than most. It’s funny to watch the dynamic between the three of them. He protects them while they protect him, and the love, that bond, it surpasses anything any parent anywhere could ask for.
And now there’s the girl, Gia. She looks at my kid like he hung the moon. They’ve known each other for a mere few weeks, and already he’d won her over. Not only that, but the lengths he’d gone to, to protect her, to give her back some of what she’d lost, even going so far as to give her family. How can he not see how perfect he is in all our eyes?
Because of this, I’ve been battling my anger at my darling wife over this shit more in the last few days than ever before. The more I worry that he’s about to make a move against Ricci, the more I resent her for telling my kid that shit. Of course, she couldn’t have known that he’d study men like Sun Tzu and Niccolò Machiavelli, or that he’d have a code of honor not like our modern counterparts but like someone forged in the damn BC era when people’s honor meant something.
Still, she should never have told him, and I’m afraid there’s going to be some tension between her and me if anything happens to our son because of it. I’m sure she was still full of vengeance when she told him about her past and had all but forgotten it as time went on.
I’d gone out of my way after all to, if not erase her past, numb her to the effects of that night. I won’t ever say she had no right to her need for revenge, and in some ways, I can see why she’d told him, why she’d expected what she did by telling him. Ma would’ve done the same, no doubt. In theory, it sounds good. In practice, as a man who just wants to protect his son, it’s fucked.
And now she’s here, laughing, shopping, having a good time, not realizing that there’s a good chance this could all come crashing down in a day or two. How the fuck am I supposed to shield her from that shit when I don’t even know what type of shit it is? The boy gives me nothing.
I sicced Lance on his ass, but from his noncommittal shrug just now, he didn’t learn anything. On the other hand, he was with Gabe all afternoon and didn’t know that the kid had basically offed someone using someone else’s hands to do it halfway around the world while they enjoyed the sights or whatever it was they were doing at the time.
Look, I have no issue with my son offing people who deserve it. When my Poppy got hit all those years ago, I did what I had to do and will always do to protect me and mine. I get a kick out of the mind fuck games he seems to be so adept at playing with people as well, even though he kinda makes me nervous with how good he is at that shit.
I’m Machiavellian with my shit. You hit me; I hit you back end of story. Gabe is a whole different breed. I know enough to know that it messes with his head that he has part of Ricci in him. If I could, I would cut it out and replace it with the best of me, but I can’t, and his young mind and heart doesn’t seem able to separate the two, which I know but can’t address because we’re in that weird space where he’s not supposed to know that I know and so on and so on.
I want to go to him and tell him not to do anything without me. But how can I without letting him know that I know what his mother had shared with him? She’d meant that to stay between the two of them, and I dare not breach, but it’s tearing me up inside. He’s my boy, my son. I want to protect him. But he’s a man now, too, isn’t he? A man with his own convictions and ethics. How can I stand in the way of that?