“Cayson needs us here.”
“And I’m here to help as much as I can. You’re not alone.”
Anderson nods, a sigh leaving his lips. “I know. It’s just… he’s making steady progress, but he’s still demonstrating confusion from the head trauma. He looks at me like I’m a stranger.”
Worry swarms my mind. “He looks at me the same way. But we have to remember what he’s been through. What he’s still going through. You heard the doc. We can’t force his progress”
“What if he never recovers his memory?”
My chest tightens at the doomed question none of us speaks. “You heard the doctors. He just needs time. We’re lucky he’s alive.”
Anderson blows out a heavy breath. “I know that. And it’s crazy that you were here when we got the call from Mom.” His expression relaxes some as he steadies his gaze on me. “Whatever brought you back here when it did, I’m grateful for it.”
My thoughts immediately drift to Violet in that rose-gold bunny mask that disguised her from the world but not from me. There isn’t a morsel of skin on that woman’s body that I wouldn’t remember.
“You know how I feel about us all running this place the way we used to talk about,” Anderson continues. “Maybe it’s wrong of me, but I still picture it. All of us here, taking equal ownership like we were raised to. I’m sorry. I just can’t let it go.”
My brother is only a couple years older than me, but he’s most definitely years ahead of all of us as far as maturity and responsibility go. Anderson’s been working hard at our family camp for his entire life, nearly killing himself to fulfill the dream we all once talked about. He feels like it’s his duty, being the oldest, to remind his brothers of our destiny. Unfortunately, the four of us have long gone our separate ways, and I don’t see any way of coming back to where we once were.
“Don’t be sorry. You’ve always been a dreamer.” I debate my next words, hating that I couldn’t see the future Anderson did for all of us. “It’s just a very unlikely future, is all. Think about it. Cayson’s only here because of his recovery. He’ll have a lot to figure out after the fact, and he might want to return to North Carolina. And Benny…”
Anderson nods in regard to our other younger brother who returned to Camp Bexley after getting word about Cayson’s accident. Before he returned, most of us hadn’t spoken or seen him in years. Come to find out, he’d maintained a really close relationship with Cayson.
“Benny’s only here for Cayson,” Anderson says, confirming my thoughts. His eyes flicker to mine. “What about you? Seems you’re here for more than just Cayson. You showed up here a week before we got the call about Cayson, but you never told me why.” Anderson’s questioning gaze narrows on mine.
“I told you I was in town for business.”
“Business on Orcas Island? You must think I’m an idiot to believe that.”
I chuckle. “Business on San Juan Island.”
He makes a face. “You’re seriously telling me you have a client over there? Who?”
My jaw tenses at his curiosity. “Randall Gentry. He lives on San Juan Island but his headquarters is in Seattle. He was having a party at his house, so I stopped by here to see you after.”
I could elaborate to tell the entire truth—that Violet was an exotic dancer at that party, that I couldn’t get thoughts of her out of my mind, and that immediately after seeing her, I couldn’t bring myself to go back to Seattle without finding her again and knowing that she was okay. It just so happened that during my first stay here, we got the call from our mother that Cayson’s rescue plane had gone down and he’d been airlifted to the base hospital in North Carolina.
But what’s the use in confessing my truth when it will only bring on more questions?
Anderson is well aware of my past relationship with Violet. He was there at the beginning of our friendship when I felt immense guilt for the bullying. He chaperoned us at movies and chauffeured us around town before we were old enough to drive. He saw the way she crept into my heart and burrowed herself there like she would never leave. And he was right there with me when she had. Which is precisely why I can’t risk telling him the truth. Anderson’s loyalty is something fierce. In his eyes, Violet Hart’s betrayal is unforgivable.
“How’s Benny?” My attempt to change the direction of the conversation seems to work immediately.
Anderson sighs. “Hard to say. He sneaks into the house to see Cay and then leaves before I get back to the house. He’s like a ghost.”
“At least we know where he is now.”
“Do we? He definitely doesn’t sleep here. He just comes and goes. What if he doesn’t come back this time?”
I lean over and clap Anderson on the back. “As long as Cayson is recovering, he’s not going anywhere. You can imagine why he might be taking this harder than anyone.”
The weight of a boulder settles in my chest when hearing his words. He’s right. Whatever Benson’s dealing with in his head has got to be heavier than any of us could ever know, but we can come close. We all lost a brother, but Benson lost his twin.
It’s already getting dark by the time I leave Camp Bexley to head back to Seattle.
I shudder as I make my way down the dimly lit path toward the parking lot. The large plot of land has been in our family for decades, but it was after Anderson and I were born that our father decided to make something of it. What started out as a regular campground, with sites for RVs and tents, transitioned yearly to eventually become a sleepaway camp, primarily for kids. What was known as Camp Dakota then is known as Camp Bexley now, thanks to my older brother and his dreamy pursuits of bringing joy back to the campground we all once loved. But times were simpler when we were kids. When our father’s passion was admirable and inspiring. Who knew that all it would take was a few years of shitty profits to change our father into a full-blown monster, but that’s exactly what happened.
I trudge along to the parking lot, knowing I should probably walk faster to make sure that I don’t miss the last ferry of the night. But all I can think of now is the last time I set foot on that vessel four days ago, only for Violet to find me there.
Facing her back on that ferry has haunted me ever since. I can’t stop thinking about her and her secret. If it’s not shame that imprisons her, then why carry such a heavy lie? I can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong. She needs help. And I want to be the one to help her.
Violet might be the reason I vowed never to come back to this island when I first left years ago, but seeing her again broke open a part of me I’d kept hidden from the world. I’m being forced to face my demons, one shadow at a time. Not even burying myself in work again could stop the memories from flooding me to the point of suffocation.
One memory in particular haunts me. We were fifteen—and far too naive for our good. It was an innocent exchange while swimming off the dock, but it was one that seemed to trigger a domino effect of events.
“My eyes are up here, Jamison Bexley.”
Violet’s sharp tone was enough to snap my gaze to hers. “Shit. Was I staring at them?”