He shakes his head, his frown clouding his features. “It’s torture.” His glare heats my skin even more. “Before I saw you tonight, my memory was so damn vivid, I felt like I was right back in your college dorm room tossing out the rulebook of our friendship and ignoring all potential consequences.”
I peer back at him, knowing exactly what he’s referring to. It was our freshman year at Western when we were both living in a coed dorm. We fooled around a lot that year. It seemed anytime one of our roommates was away, we were taking advantage, pretending we were only friends even when we weren’t dating anyone else.
And it all started on one particular night…
12 YEARS AGO, VIOLET
“Let me taste you.”
His request was so innocent yet so desperate at the same time. He wanted this, and I definitely wanted it too. I didn’t know what had come over me between leaving Jami earlier in the night and then finding him in front of that television with our dorm mates, but jealousy had definitely played a part.
The next thing I knew, his mouth was on mine, kissing me like he’d never kissed me before. Hungry, eager, loud. He growled in a way that made my entire body buzz. When he peeled his mouth back from mine, his eyes were like a crystal ball. I could see what was coming next, and there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted it to happen.
He pushed my tank top up, exposing my breasts. His tongue was swirling around a nipple before my top had even cleared my body, so I yanked it the rest of the way off and chucked it to the floor.
His mouth on me was dizzying and so much different than how it had been in that tent six months earlier. He sucked me harder, almost to the brink of pain, but I wanted more. So much more. My fingers dragged through his hair and grabbed hold while I pleaded with him, whispering. “More.” And that was exactly what he gave me.
His kisses left my nipple and moved down my stomach. There was only one moment of pause when Jami’s lids flipped up to see me while he peeled off my shorts.
I sucked in a breath at the sight of his head hanging between my thighs, my most private parts completely exposed for him to do as he pleased. Panic flitted through my chest, and my hand flew out to clamp on his. “Wait. Is this okay?”
He stared back at me while breathing heavily. “I can’t think of anything more okay than this, Vi. Do you want me to stop?”
I shook my head. “No, but…” I gripped his hand beneath mine. “We should talk about this. We’re friends.”
His tongue darted out and licked his bottom lip. “Best friends.”
For some reason his response made me laugh, alleviating some of my panic. “What kind of best friends do this?”
His gaze darted to the space between my thighs then back up to me before a smirk tilted his lips. “The kissing kind.”
My heart fluttered, and I wished it would stop. Something about the intimacy of the moment combined with my jealousy from earlier began to scare me. I had feelings for my best friend. More than that, I’d always had feelings, but I didn’t know how much longer I’d be able to separate attraction and love for the man who had always been there for me.
“Jami, I’m serious.”
He lowered his head and pressed his lips so close I could feel his breath floating over my clit. “So am I.” His eyes met mine, his expression softer. “There’s no rulebook when it comes to friendship. Besides, I’ve always given you your firsts. Why not this one?”
A voice deep down in my brain noted that he hadn’t said our firsts. Just mine. If I let him go down on me, at least this was one first I could claim of his. Anger sparked in my tone with my next words. “How selfish of you.”
The corners of his mouth tilted even more, causing his sexy dimple to pop in his cheek. “I’m just dedicated to this friendship. But I’ll stop if you want me to.”
A new wave of panic zapped my entire body, causing me to jerk beneath him. His hovering mouth brushed my clit, and it was enough to stamp down any objections I might have had to what would come next. My fingers wove back through his hair, and I brought his head down enough to let him know my answer, and then I spoke the words, just so he’d be clear. “Please don’t stop.”
Not a second later, his lids fluttered closed, and he lapped at my center. I grew dizzy watching his thick tongue move over me, the wetness from his mouth adding to my own slippery center.
My heart became a hummingbird in flight, rapidly moving, yet hovering right where he needed me. He seemed to be taking his time, testing his limits while exploring all the uncharted territory in his reach. He didn’t stop with his tongue either.
He was sucking my clit into his mouth when I felt one of his thick fingers enter me. I might have stopped breathing for a full five seconds while I acclimated to the stretch. Before Jami, the only person who had fingered me was myself, and it never felt remotely this good.
Once the shock wore off, all I felt was immeasurable pleasure. I also felt greedy for the explosion that was sure to come soon. I was no longer questioning right or wrong or what would happen when the night was over. That had never been our style, so I made the decision right then and there… the only thing that mattered was that I was giving another first to the only man I’d ever loved. Labels be damned.
Chapter Sixteen
JAMISON
“Look who just showed.” Anderson nudges me and tips his chin in the direction of the entrance.
Dread is already sinking in my gut before I spot Benny strutting toward us. It’s after-hours at the saloon, so the crowd thinned out to Hope’s party guests only. I was able to let two of the new hires head home too.
“You think he’ll play nice?” I’m somewhat teasing, but I would be lying to both of us if I said I wasn’t worried about Benny’s behavior. He’s always been a bit of a loose cannon. Thankfully, he looks sober, but that doesn’t mean much with him.
Anderson tosses me a grin. “Guess we’re about to find out.”
Benson glares as he makes his way closer. “What are you dickheads talking about?”
“Trying to figure out who gave you an invite to the party.” I say it with a shit-eating grin I usually reserve for my brothers.
Luckily, Benson notes the humor and chuckles. Then he tugs on Hope’s hand and wraps an arm around her. “My friend here invited me.” He turns to her with a grin and plants a big kiss on her cheek. “Happy birthday, beautiful.”
Hope giggles and returns the hug with a sideways one of her own. “Thanks, Benny. Are you here to buy me a shot?”
“Of course. What are we drinking tonight?”
Hope raises her arms above her head. “Alcohol!”
Laughter surrounds us, and I raise my brows to Anderson to see what he says about letting Hope drink anymore tonight, but his easygoing smile says it all. The woman gets whatever she damn well pleases.
“Hope’s cleaning out our whiskey supply tonight. How many shots do you want?”
Hope tries to count on her fingers but ends up shrugging. “Seven?”
Chuckling, I turn toward the bar to find Violet already reaching for the bottle of Jack. “I’ve got this.”