He cocks his head. “No,” he says as if he’s reaching that conclusion as he speaks. “Like you said, it’s not my fault. And I don’t think he’d treat me any differently even if he knew.”
“True.”
“Rock always says blood doesn’t matter. It’s character and loyalty that earns your place in this family.”
“He means it.” I think over the conversation I had with the girls not that long ago. “Almost everyone—the brothers and ol’ ladies—have little or no blood family in their lives for one reason or another. But we don’t need them, because we have the club. That’s our family.”
“Thank you for letting me be part of your life.”
I hug him again. “Always.”
“You deserve a loving family, Charlotte.” His voice cracks. “I like how close you are to the girls. Hope and Lilly, especially. You’ve always been such a good sister to me. You need a good big sister too.”
I don’t know if I really was that good of a sister to him. There sure seem to be a lot of things I missed.
“I remember how hard Mom was on you,” he continues, touching one of the long curls spilling over my shoulder. “It drove her nuts that you were so pretty. She’d say the meanest things right to your face. Even when I was a kid, I thought she sounded jealous. But it felt weird. What kind of mother is jealous of her own daughter?”
I swallow hard, embarrassed he remembers those cruel details. “A vain, immature one.”
He nods once. “That fits.” He presses his lips together like he’s debating his next words. “Chuck’s gross the way he talks about women but I remember him trying to stick up for you sometimes when Mom got out of control.”
Even I have to admit that’s true. “I don’t think it was easy for him to contradict her, though.”
“She and Chuck had a thing before Dad,” he says matter-of-factly.
“You knew?”
“Heard them argue about it. Talk about immature.” He rolls his eyes in a dramatic fashion. “The two of them never evolved past senior year.”
I snort.
“But when you changed, they did too,” he continues. “Her addictions got worse. Their relationship more volatile.” He stares at his pants and brushes at a loose thread. “I wondered if Chuck made a pass at you or something gross.”
I sigh. “Our family’s that fucked up, huh?”
He shrugs.
“This is hard for me to talk about. But you’re right. I’d rather tell you everything now, so I can start my new life as Marcel’s wife.” I press my hand to my stomach. “And as a mother who will always do better for her children.”
“I know you will, Charlotte. You were always so good, so patient with me. And I know I was demanding and annoying sometimes.”
“No you weren’t.” I smooth my hands over my dress. If we’re doing this, I better get it out now before I lose my nerve. “You remember I originally wanted to be a criminal lawyer?”
“Kind of.”
“Well, I did. I thought I’d prove myself useful to the club, you know?”
“God, why?”
I shrug. “We all seek approval from our parents in different ways, I guess.”
“Yikes.” He presses his fist into his gut. “That’s deep.”
I tilt my head, but realize he’s serious, not teasing me.
“Second year of law school, I went to the Christmas party at the clubhouse. You were sick.” I squeeze my eyes shut. “I wish to God I’d stayed home to take care of you.”
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, Charlotte.” Anxiety creeps into his voice.
“Something bad happened to me that night,” I confirm, uncomfortable sharing more details than that with my little brother. “It wasn’t Chuck,” I hurry to add. “It was a guy Mom owed money to.” I leave it at that.
But Carter’s too smart not to put the pieces together.
“No,” he whispers. “She…” his voice trails off and he stares out the window.
“Well, she was kind enough to drug me first, so I wouldn’t remember any pesky details.” Anger sharp as acid burns my throat. “Then gaslight me afterward.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I couldn’t tell you something so ugly.” I blow out a breath wanting to just get this over with. “It happened at Chuck’s clubhouse, so after all the family first loyalty bullshit we’d heard all our lives, I thought he’d take care of it. But he didn’t. At least at the time, I didn’t think he did. He was…awful to me. But he put two and two together and realized Mom had set me up.”
“Jesus,” he breathes out, but he doesn’t question me or argue with what I’m sharing.
“He flipped when Marcel and I started seeing each other,” I explain. “Not because of club stuff, but because he was afraid if I told Marcel what happened to me, he’d dig deeper. Chuck couldn’t have that because all those years, he was covering up what Mom had done.”
He sits back and stares at me. “I can’t decide if that’s better or worse than him trying to fight over you like a territorial dog with a patch of grass.”
“Better, I suppose. He always had some sort of twisted love or loyalty to Mom, I guess. But he said once he knew what she did to me, it soured how he saw her.”
He nods slowly and seems to ponder all of that. “I always wondered why they turned so vicious toward each other.”
I lift one shoulder, not really caring to examine their toxic relationship much closer.
“No wonder Chuck went nomad these last few years. Teller’s all the things Chuck claims to be. Must make him feel two feet tall to be around him.”
I never quite thought about it in those terms. “You’re probably right.”
“Men who think they’re alpha get super intimidated and defensive when they’re in the presence of real alpha men,” he explains like a professor of male psychology.
“I think Chuck wants to do better by us but he doesn’t know how.” I shrug.
“The few times I’ve seen him since the rescue, he hasn’t called me any names.” He lifts his eyebrows in a teasing way. “So I guess old dogs can learn new tricks, after all.”
“I’m glad, but be careful. I’ll never trust him completely.”
“Same.” He flicks his gaze toward the door. “Teller doesn’t trust him either. At first, I thought it was that biker-territorial-claimed-my-woman thing. Now, I understand it’s much deeper than that.”
My nose stings. “Yes.”
He takes both my hands in his. “I’m so, so sorry that happened to you, Charlotte.”
“Thanks.”
“And just so you know, you didn’t ruin my memory of Mom, or anything.” He pauses and seems to search for the right words. “I’d rather know the truth about the kind of person she was, than have you suffer in silence, trying to protect me from the truth.”
That’s it. I’m done. I burst into tears.
“Damn.” He swipes a tissue and dabs at my cheeks. “Don’t make me get Serena to come back in here and fix all your makeup stuff. I don’t want to piss off a woman about to go into labor any day.”