“No. He was rough and mean, but he didn’t do… that.”
“Thank fuck,” I say, pulling her into my arms. I need to hold her right now, and by the way her body sinks into mine, she doesn’t mind.
“I’ve never been on a date with someone I chose. I’ve never kissed someone I wanted to kiss. My life wasn’t my own.”
“I’m so sorry.” I press my lips to the top of her head.
“I ran away from all of it. I swore off dating and men, and I just wanted to do me. I wanted to work and save money and get my own place. I wanted to save more money because I never wanted to have to depend on someone to take care of me ever again.”
“I can understand that.” Her three jobs make much more sense to me now.
“I didn’t know I needed you or someone like you until I met you.”
“Me,” I correct her. “Needed me. Not someone else. Just so we’re clear,” I say, making her laugh.
Pulling away from my chest, her eyes lock on mine. “You were the first kiss that I wanted.”
Her words have my heart beating faster. “Have dinner with me?”
“I thought we already were?”
“Not here. A date. Go on a date with me?” I’m more than asking for a date, and we both know it. I’m asking her to choose me. Regardless of all the obstacles that could stand in our way, I still want her.
“When?”
“You pick the day, and I’ll make it happen.”
“Is this where I’m supposed to pretend like I have to look at my calendar?”
I move in close. Our lips are barely a breath apart. “No, baby. This is where you choose me. This is where we stop worrying about anything that could complicate this and choose to be with each other.”
“I think Palmer is on board.” She smiles.
“And Orrin, well, he’s just going to have to deal with it.”
“I’m twenty-three next month.”
“I’ll be thirty-three in October.”
“Ten years isn’t so bad.” The words are barely out of her mouth before I’m kissing her.
How can I not kiss her when her statement has been my biggest hurdle in all of this? Sure, my best friend might be pissed, but this is Ramsey we’re talking about. I’d be a fool not to see where this goes, and if he can’t understand that, then so be it. As far as my sister goes, Ramsey’s right. Palmer is on board. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if she planned this from the very beginning. She’s always telling me I need someone to share my life with and has begged me for a couple of years now to let her fix me up. I can’t help but wonder if the person she wanted to fix me up with was Ramsey all along.
“I work on the weekends.”
“I don’t care when.”
“Monday night? I don’t work Monday or Tuesday next week.”
“Both.”
“What?” She laughs.
“I want both nights.”
“What if I’m terrible company?” She grins.
That simple act has me standing a little taller and puffing out my chest. She’s comfortable here. With me. “Not possible. Monday and Tuesday.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
She nods and leans in close. Her eyes find mine asking for permission. I nod, and she kisses me. It’s soft and quick, and it was her choice. That fact alone makes me want to beat against my chest like a caveman.
“Are you hungry?”
“Yes. I was too nervous to eat before I came over.”
“And now?”
“Now, I’m not.”
“Good.” I kiss her once more before standing and pulling her to her feet. “Come keep me company while I cook for you.” She allows me to link our hands together and lead her into the kitchen. I can’t help but think about life with her, lazy Saturday afternoons. Sundays in bed making love. The vision is clear and so real.
I want that.
I want her.
eleven
Ramsey
“Nothing fancy,” Deacon says, leading us into his kitchen.
“Can I help with anything?” I ask him.
He turns to face me and grins. “You can. You can keep me company.”
Before I know what’s happening, he grips my hips and lifts me onto the island. He leans in and pecks my lips with a kiss before pulling away. I watch him as he begins to remove items from the refrigerator.
“You sure you don’t need any help?” I ask.
“I’m positive. We’re having burgers on the grill, and I have a couple of different kinds of chips, and I picked up a fruit tray for dessert.”
“The perfect summer meal.” I smile. I find that I do that a lot where Deacon is concerned. I feel comfortable with him. And we’re going on a date! I don’t know what it means, and I’m not going to ask. For once in my life, I’m rolling with it, because I want to see what happens, not because I’m being forced to. Deacon is definitely someone I want to get to know better.
“I thought so too. I already sliced a tomato and cut up some lettuce, so really, I just need to grill the burgers.”
“Aren’t we supposed to wait on Palmer?”
He closes the fridge and turns to face me. He’s holding a plate of hamburger patties. He’s really prepared for this. “She told us to, but I have to do something. If I just sit next to you, I’m going to kiss you.”
“Is that so bad?” I quickly place my hand over my mouth. I can’t believe I said that out loud. “I-I’m sorry.”
Deacon places everything in his hands on the counter and steps between my legs. “Can I touch you?”
I nod. I’m so embarrassed I just blurted that out. I hate that suddenly he feels as though he has to ask again. I was doing so well.
He places his index finger beneath my chin and lifts it until my eyes are level with his. “Never with me. Never sensor yourself. If you’re pissed off, I want to hear it. I don’t care if you’re screaming and yelling at me. I want to hear it. If you want me to kiss you, I want you to tell me. If you want my hands on you,” he leans in even closer, “I want you to tell me. There is nothing that you could do or say that would cause me to put my hands on you in anger. I might get pissed off, and we’re going to argue, Ramsey. We’re human and emotional creatures, but I promise you, baby, I will never hurt you.”
His words have my eyes growing misty with tears. “I was never allowed to… my ex and my father, they would get angry, and it was easier just to bite my tongue.”
“Nah, none of that,” he whispers huskily. “I can think of so many better things to do with that tongue,” he says as his lips press against mine.
I feel bold and brazen and more alive than I’ve ever felt in my entire life. I wrap my legs around his waist, holding him to me while my hands lock behind his neck. This time I’m the one who takes things further, swiping at his lips with my tongue, begging for entrance.
Deacon wraps his arms around me and opens his mouth, letting me take the lead. I’m nervous. I’ve never had the opportunity to do so before. Not only that, but I want to kiss him. I enjoy kissing him. I could kiss him for hours. His hand slides up my back and cradles the back of my neck, holding me close. His hot breath mingles with mine as everything around us fades away. It’s just the two of us, sharing a kiss that lights my body on fire, and soothes the ache in my heart.