“You can’t be ready to go again,” I giggle. “You’re still dressed.”
He pulls his shirt over his head and kicks off the shorts and boxers, which were still at mid-thigh, and then lowers himself and — damn. There it is. He’s more than ready.
“You have no idea how many times a day – no, hour – I’ve thought about doing this,” he says, moving against me until he’s in the exact right place. “I have some catching up to do.”
The air stutters in my throat as he pushes forward, but the sound of the front door slamming makes us both freeze. I hear the clip of Ginny’s heels coming down the hallway.
“Elle?” she calls. She sounds upset.
“God damn it,” James hisses. “She has the worst timing.”
I push away but he grabs my hips. “Stay. She’s fine. The door’s locked.”
“James,” I reply. “She’s crying.”
“She’ll stop eventually.”
“James … ”.
“Fine,” he groans, pulling out. “Go.”
In a move that’s becoming especially familiar, I throw on only the dress, climb off his balcony and run to the backyard, before climbing the deck stairs. I walk back in through the sliding door. She stands in the middle of the room, looking ashen.
“I slept with him,” she weeps. “Elle, what the hell is wrong with me?”
**
Ginny is inconsolable. I get her upstairs and into our room, and she collapses into herself on the bed.
“I slept with him,” she whispers, in shock. “I mean last time was bad enough but this … it’s too much.”
“It’s okay,” I soothe, for lack of anything I can tell her that’s actually true.
“How could I do this to Alex?” she cries.
“This was going to happen eventually. You and Alex just met too young.”
“No,” she wails. “I don’t even like Paul, and Alex is perfect for me.”
I rub her back, and wait for her to calm down on her own. I suspect anything I can say will make things worse.
She raises her tear-stained face. “Why did I do it? Alex is everything I want in a husband.”
“Just because he’s everything you want doesn’t necessarily mean that you want him, though,” I tell her. “Honestly, Ginny, I think maybe you’ve been bored for a long time. I mean, were you really going to marry the first guy you slept with?”
This makes her cry harder. I shouldn’t have brought it up. I never had any great sentiment attached to losing my virginity, but she did. “I’m sorry,” I tell her. “I know it was a big deal to you.”
She begins crying and laughing simultaneously. “No, you’re totally right. Paul was so much better at it than Alex. I had no idea it could be that good. It wasn’t even like the same activity.” She laughs again and then begins sobbing. “I have to break up with him, don’t I?”
“Seems like a good idea.”
That sets off a new wave of crying, while she protests that she loves him, that she’ll never love anyone that much, that he was so perfect and she ruined it, just like James ruined things with Allison. I’m glad she doesn’t see my face when she utters that last bit. The tears go on for hours. Or maybe it just feels like hours because every minute I spend rubbing her back is a minute I spend guiltily wishing I was back downstairs with her brother.
Chapter 44
In the morning he’s waiting for me. He hands me my coffee. “Almond milk and lots of sugar,” he grins.
“You noticed,” I say. Thank God no one’s down here right now to hear the absolute adoration in my voice.
“I notice everything about you,” he says, stepping closer, running his fingers over my mouth. That small action is all it takes for my adoration to fire into something else. “I’ve spent every waking minute since you left my room thinking about last night.”
He lowers his mouth, breathing into me, removing the coffee from my hand and pressing me against the counter. The kiss deepens and the next thing I know I’m being lifted, pressed against him in all the right places, his tongue sweeping mine.
“My room,” he says. “Right now.”
“Yes,” I breathe, sliding off the counter into his waiting hands, just as the front door slams.
“Fuck,” pants James, resting his forehead against mine. “I think we need our own place.” He backs away just as Max walks in.
“Was I interrupting something?” he smirks.
“No,” we say simultaneously. Both of us sound way too guilty. Max rolls his eyes.
“Is Ginny okay?” James asks me.
“What’s wrong with Ginny?” Max follows, looking anxious. He talks a good game, but he really does care about her, I think.
“Nothing,” I lie. Max is probably the last person Ginny would want to know about this. “I think she’s just having some problems with Alex.”
“What kind of problems?” he asks.
I shrug. “I’m not sure she’s as into it as she was.”
James raises a brow. Her hallway confessional last night revealed a lot more than that.
When I hear Ginny moving around I go upstairs to check on her. Her eyes are red and raw but she is no longer crying.
“How are you feeling?” I ask.
“Crappy,” she says. “But I think it’s all out of my system.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that I’ve had my one fling, and it’s behind me.” I’d like to remind her that it’s not actually her first, but I don’t.
“So you’re not breaking up with Alex?” I ask.
“No,” she says. “I can’t. He’d be devastated.” It’s not really the moment for a lecture, so I keep my thoughts to myself. But I imagine he’d be more devastated by a wife who he stopped making happy in high school.
**
The cop from Wednesday calls around lunchtime. “So I spoke to counsel,” he says haltingly. “They don’t see grounds for a restraining order.”
“Really?” I ask in surprise. I’m relieved, but in another way it doesn’t make much sense. “I thought you said you were sure it warranted one? You even thought there’d be an investigation.”
James’s eyes narrow when he hears that last bit.
“You can’t be more surprised than I am,” the cop says. “You didn’t hear it from me, but my guess is that Edward Ferris managed to put a stop to it.” James sees my face fall, and holds his hand out for the phone.
I sigh. “My boyfriend wants to talk to you,” I say, and James’s mouth quirks up a little at that, as does mine.
I hand him the phone, and he proceeds to argue vehemently against the decision, though it’s clearly out of the cop’s hands.
“This is complete bullshit,” he says to me after he hangs up.
“I know,” I sigh. “But James, I’m kind of okay with it. I really don’t think Edward’s going to hurt me, and if this got out my name would be everywhere again, only worse. Edward would have his publicist out telling everyone who will listen that I’m some attention-seeking slut.”