Alys gawked. “Our daughter could be a doctor?”
“Yes.”
“Could she fly like you?”
“No.” For the first time in his life, he realized what closing off certain fields to women really meant. He might have a daughter who inherited his love and skill for aeronautics, but she would be barred from learning to fly. “Flying and fighting are male-only tracks.”
“That doesn’t seem fair.”
“It’s not,” he agreed, already wondering what could be done to change that.
“I’m happy to be a mother and a wife, but I want my daughters to have more choices. I want them to fly if that’s their dream.”
“If we have a daughter who wants to fly, there are places where she can learn. The Colonies,” he clarified, peeling out of his clothing. “Flying isn’t closed to women there.”
“My brother wants to go there. He wants to go to school and do something more than just farm.”
“Is he as smart as you?”
“Smarter,” she said. “And he’s dedicated and hardworking.”
“I have no doubt.” Swift couldn’t imagine any of her siblings were anything less than industrious. “We could look into some of the programs that offer scholarships and subsidies for citizens of the planets we colonize. If he qualifies, he would have guaranteed work post training and similar benefits to the ones I have.”
“That would be so helpful, Swift.” She beamed at him on their bed, and his stomach churned at the knowledge that he would soon have to tell her about Shear.
“I’ll make inquiries tomorrow,” he promised before entering the bathroom.
When he came out a short while later, she had set aside her tablet and turned down the lights. She yawned as she slid lower under the covers. “Should I undress?”
“No.” He understood that was her way of asking whether he wanted to have sex. He did, of course, but she was obviously sleepy. There was plenty of time for carnal delights, and he was just as happy to hold her anyway. “Come here,” he said as he slid into bed beside her.
She moved over with a soft smile and let him draw her into his arms. She kissed his jaw and cheek before her lips found his mouth in a slow, sensual kiss. He stroked her face as he kissed her back, reveling in the gentle intimacy of cuddling with his mate.
With a drowsy smile, she burrowed her face against his neck. “I think our first dinner went well.”
“Very,” he agreed. “Lights off.”
The command given, the lights dimmed until they were completely dark. He pulled Alys a little closer and tugged the covers over her shoulders. He had noticed she slept better when she was completely cozy and warm.
He felt her relax in his arms. Her breasts deepened, and she let loose a little sigh that signaled she was completely out. He wasn’t so lucky. His brain tormented him with guilt and shame and images of Alys with Shear that turned his stomach.
He finally had the life he had craved so long, but his past mistakes and arrogance threatened to ruin it. If he couldn’t get Shear to cancel their trade, he would lose Alys. He would destroy her trust, and she would see him for the monster he was.
She would leave him—and he would be crushed.
And he would deserve every painful moment of it.
Chapter Thirteen
Panting and trembling with the aftershocks of her orgasm, Alys draped her forearm over her face and tried to catch her breath. Swift dotted kisses along her neck and cheek before falling onto his side next to her, equally as out of breath. He nuzzled into her hair and wrapped his arms around her waist. With a rough laugh, he said, “I think we’re getting really good at this.”
She giggled and cuddled into his soothing heat. He wasn’t wrong. They really were good together.
“We should—.” A chime interrupted Swift, and he let loose an annoyed sigh. “That’s not good.”
“What is it?” She hadn’t heard that particular chime yet and wasn’t sure what kind of alert it was.
“That’s the sound that means I’m being called back to duty,” he grumbled. After another quick kiss, he grunted and shoved out of bed. He snatched a pair of shorts from the floor and hopped into them before leaving the bedroom.
Completely unmotivated to move, Alys remained in bed, cozy in the cocoon of sheets. She wished she had one of her mother’s quilts to draw up over her head and block out the fake sunlight streaming through the fake windows. She tried not to think of home very often because it caused feelings of homesickness that twisted her gut and squeezed her heart. She missed her siblings and her mother and worried about all of them.
The guilt of running away and leaving her mother in the lurch ate away at the happiness she felt here with Swift. She had never been a selfish person. She had always been the first to offer to help, to sacrifice her needs and wants for others, but now? After getting a taste of real happiness, of feeling precious and protected and wanted, the thought of going back home was unimaginable. She would visit, of course. If her father would allow it. But she could never go back to that life. She could never be that girl again.
Swift returned with a grumpy look on his handsome face. “I’ve been called back to duty.”
Sitting up, she held the sheet against her bare breasts and asked, “Is it serious?”
He shook his head. “Patrols.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” Swift scowled, and she sensed he wanted to say much more. Whether he kept his thoughts to himself because he was doing something that qualified as secret or because he didn’t want to talk badly about his superiors, she couldn’t say. Regardless, she wasn’t going to pry. The pamphlets and booklets she had read all stressed how important operational security was to the ongoing safety of their mission.
“Do you have time for breakfast?” She couldn’t imagine sending him back to work on an empty stomach or with only those disgusting nutrition bars to satisfy his hunger.
“I have time for more than breakfast.” His handsome grin made her stomach do flips. “I don’t report for another four hours.”
“Well,” she said, flushed with excitement and desire, “I definitely need something to eat before we do anything else.” When he leered, she rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at him before he could make a dirty remark about eating something much more intimate than breakfast. “Stop!”
Swift laughed and caught the pillow before it impacted his head. He brought it back to the bed and leaned down to kiss her. Of course, one kiss wasn’t enough. It led to two and three and four and then she lost count until her stomach growled loudly. Chagrined, Swift pulled away. “Sorry. I got carried away.”
“I don’t mind,” she murmured, sneaking in one final kiss before throwing back the covers.
“Here.” Swift handed her the night gown that had been thrown on the floor earlier. After she slipped into it, she ducked into the bathroom for a few minutes and then passed Swift in the bedroom on her way to the kitchen. He joined her not long after and helped make breakfast. She enjoyed these simple domestic moments with him.
They shared a quiet breakfast, and once the kitchen was tidy again, Swift began to go over the rules for her safety. Most of them were common sense, but she sat quietly and let him talk, certain it would make him feel better to get it all out before he left.