As soon as he saw me, he threw his hands in the air. “That doctor still hasn’t made it in here. What kind of hours do these people work? I’ve got a parish to protect, and they’re holding me here like I’m going to keel over in the next ten minutes. If it was so serious, why isn’t he here already?”
“Let me go check.”
I headed for the nurses’ station and found a harried-looking nurse who gave me a suspicious look. I had a feeling she’d recently been on the receiving end of Blanchet’s anger.
“I’m a friend of Andy Blanchet and was wondering if there’s a way to contact his doctor.”
She sighed. “I’ve already told Mr. Blanchet that his doctor is in surgery and will make his rounds as soon as he’s out.”
“Any estimate on that—one hour, ten? Just trying to get an idea how long I need to contain him because I know he’s not making this easy on you. In his defense, he’s been appointed temporary sheriff while Carter LeBlanc is out of the country, and he’s worried about not fulfilling his job duties, especially as he just started yesterday. You know how these old-school guys are about responsibility to the public.”
She softened a little and gave me a grateful look. “Reminds me of my father a little, which is both a good and a bad thing. I know it’s frustrating, but it was an emergency surgery, so no parameters were set as far as time beforehand. However, given what the doctor’s specialty is, and the fact that he’s already been in there for two hours, I’m guessing that he’ll finish up soon, maybe within the next hour. I’ll make sure Mr. Blanchet is first on his list to see.”
“I really appreciate it.”
“Good luck with the containment, and God bless you.”
I smiled and headed back to Blanchet’s room, bracing myself for the next round of complaining.
At least he’d stopped pacing and was sitting on the couch. I sat in the chair nearby and explained the emergency surgery situation, that it should be soon, and that the nurse had assured me he was at the top of the list.
“I’m sorry you had to start off your morning dealing with me,” he said. “I know you’ve got bigger things to do than handle middle-aged man drama.”
“Don’t tell Gertie that. She thinks she’s middle-aged.”
“Ha! No way I would want to live that long. Especially if visits like this one are in my future. You get past a certain age and doctors always want to run some test and question your eating habits, exercise, and work-life balance. Meanwhile, the only guy I know who dropped dead in his forties was a marathon runner, a vegetarian, and a trust fund baby. DNA speaks louder than lifestyle.”
“Probably true. And you’re in good shape, and retired mostly, so the doctor shouldn’t have a problem with you. I’m sure it’s just a cautionary thing.”
“The darned attorneys have ruined simplicity.”
I heard a knock on the door and a second later, the door opened and a young man walked in.
Five foot ten. A hundred seventy pounds. Excellent muscular definition and low body fat. His purposeful stride said doctor, but his face said he was thirteen, max. High threat to Blanchet. Zero threat to me, except by way of not releasing Blanchet.
“I’m Dr. Yoshida,” he said as he approached. “I’m the head of the cardiac unit at the hospital.”
Blanchet blinked, and I knew what he was thinking but hoped he didn’t voice it.
“My tennis shoes are older than you.”
And he voiced it.
Dr. Yoshida looked slightly peeved, and I guessed that he probably dealt with that perception a lot, especially given that heart issues lent themselves to older generations more than younger.
“I assure you, I have the education and experience necessary for my job,” he said. “I’ve reviewed your tests and stats from the ER, and there’s an irregularity in your heartbeat that concerned the ER doctors. That’s why they asked me to take a look. Have you been informed of that irregularity before?”
Blanchet shook his head. “I get a physical every year and no one’s ever said a thing. If it was a problem, shouldn’t I have symptoms?”
“Have you experienced any light-headedness or felt tightness in your chest or difficulty breathing?”
“Not at all.”
Dr. Yoshida frowned. “But you were brought into the ER because you passed out.”
“I didn’t pass out. I tripped over some rope and banged my head and knocked myself out.”
Dr. Yoshida nodded. “That’s good. It wasn’t clear in the report. I’d like to do a stress test and an EKG just to rule out anything serious.”
“Great. So can I come back for those in a few weeks?”
“No. I’d rather get them scheduled today before you’re released.”
“Fine. But then you’ll release me for work.”
“I need to see what the test results are first.”
The door opened and I looked over as Vince Hermes, a deputy in a neighboring parish, entered the room. We’d never met in person, but Carter had shown me a picture while he’d described just how big an a-hole the guy was.
Midforties but looked older, six foot tall, two hundred sixty pounds, muscle tone sketchy, bum right knee and left shoulder, wearing a superior look that even Dr. Yoshida probably couldn’t manage. Physical threat level practically nonexistent for me. Threat level extremely high for Blanchet and everyone else in the parish given Blanchet’s current non-released status.
“Blanchet,” he said with a nod. “You’ve looked better.”
“I’ve always looked better than you, Herpes.”
Vince’s jaw flexed.
“Oh, sorry,” Blanchet said. “Air-pez.”
Dr. Yoshida looked at the two men and apparently decided he was done with the room. He gave me a nod and headed out. Hermes looked over at me and raised one eyebrow.
“Are you part of the package when someone is sheriff?”
“You couldn’t even handle me in an arm-wrestling match.”
Blanchet chuckled and Hermes gave him a death stare.
“Well, I’m here to relieve both of you of your duties,” he said. “My understanding is you’re not released for work, and we can’t let the sheriff’s position go unattended.”
“I’ll be released this afternoon,” Blanchet said. “And you don’t even live in the parish.”
“Don’t have to when the governor makes a phone call, but then, you know that. And the parishes finally ended a dispute over the area where my house is, so technically, I am a resident of the parish now.”
He grinned. “That makes me eligible to run for sheriff in the upcoming election, so I figured getting some saddle time in early would set me up nicely for when I take the position.”
I desperately wanted to slam him in the face with the bedpan, but I knew I couldn’t. For Carter’s sake, I had to be on my best behavior. But it was taking every bit of self-control not to shoot off my mouth, which would probably be worse than the bedpan maneuver.
“You’ll never beat Carter in that election,” Blanchet said. “I don’t care who your friends are. The residents of this parish know who has their best interests in mind. The only interests you have are your own.”