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Silvia was deep into her morning routine, a toothbrush sticking out of her mouth while she walked around the trailer to gather her things. She would toss what she needed into the open bookbag on the living room couch before resuming her search. Where were the damn truck keys? She was about to check the bedroom again when she noticed a piece of paper sticking out from beneath a coffee table book. She pulled it free and saw, in her mother’s handwriting, a list of towns in other states. The only word at the top was “potential” written in Spanish.
Silvia glanced at the table in the dining area, where her parents were finishing up breakfast with her little brother. They seemed distracted. She took the piece of paper with her to the bathroom, where she finished brushing her teeth while reading it. Each town had pros and cons listed beneath it, such as cost of living or the size of the Mexican community there. As if her parents were searching for somewhere new to live.
After she spat and rinsed, Silvia returned with the list to the living room, no longer trying to hide it. Her mother was standing next to Hugo while mopping up a puddle of milk on the table.
“You didn’t make this big of a mess when you were a baby!” Elena scolded in her native tongue. “I can’t wait until you are older. Fifty would be nice. You could take care of me. Now look! You’ve gotten it all over your pants!”
She watched her mother take Hugo by the arm, and stood aside as she marched him to the bedroom. Her father remained seated at the table with an expression of frustration. He still had a cast on one leg, and even though he got around fine on crutches, he hadn’t been much use for the past month. Which was perfect now, because it meant he couldn’t escape her inquisition.
“What is this?” Silvia asked as she took a seat across from him.
He only glanced at the paper before grimacing. “Don’t worry about that just yet,” he said.
“Too late!” She consulted the list again, noticing a town that had been underlined. “Melrose Park? Where is that?”
“Outside of Chicago,” her father said guardedly. “Think how exciting it would be to grow up next to such a large city.”
She was already grown up! And halfway through high school! She forced her own feelings aside for the moment because she could only think of one reason her parents would want to move. She searched her father’s face for confirmation, lingering on the beard that he had allowed to grow ever since an accident on the job had put him in the hospital. Her friends had helped sneak him out the next day, seemingly without consequence, but she worried about security cameras. Miguel must too, and thus the change in his appearance. Unless there was something she didn’t know about.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Your mother and I will talk to you about it later.”
Silvia folded her arms over her chest and didn’t speak another word. She didn’t need to. He knew she wouldn’t budge from her chair without getting answers.
Miguel sighed and nodded at the list of towns. “That is only a contingency plan,” he said.
“Yes, but why? What happened?”
His eyes darted to the hall, perhaps hoping to see his wife there, but she was still in the bedroom with Hugo.
“Did the hospital find you?” she asked. “Is that what’s going on?”
Miguel shook his head. “No. Raul came by the other day.” A friend and coworker of her father who was also undocumented. “They let him go. A lot of the others too.”
“They fired him?” Silvia shook her head. “Why? Does it have something to do with your accident?”
Miguel hesitated. “I’m not sure. A woman who works in the office told Raul that men in suits have been coming around.”
Which wouldn’t raise any alarms at an accounting firm, but her father worked for a roofing company. Or used to. “Did they fire you too?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” Miguel answered after a pause. “I called and told them I’d have my cast off soon, but the boss said there wasn’t enough work at the moment.”
That smelled fishy. Spring was just around the corner and marked the beginning of the busy season for roofing companies.
Her father was watching her expression carefully. “Raul thinks it’s a tax audit instead of immigration. Please don’t worry about any of this.”
“Okay,” Silvia said, if only to set his mind at ease. She was going to worry about it no matter what. An audit could attract the attention of immigration agents, if they caught wind of undocumented workers.
Hugo tromped into the room, meaning that Elena wouldn’t be far behind, so Silvia stood and returned the list of towns to where she had found it. She silently finished getting ready and remained quiet when driving her mother and brother into town, her mind preoccupied with one concern after another. If the IRS was poking around her father’s former workplace, would they find anything with their address on it? What if the owner was offered a plea deal to trade the names of his off-the-book employees in exchange for leniency?
She waited until after they had dropped Hugo off at school before broaching the subject.
“Dad told me,” she said.
“Told you what?” her mother asked innocently.
Silvia merely raised an eyebrow in response.
Elena sighed. “We didn’t want to worry you unnecessarily.”
“I’m an adult now,” Silvia said. “You should include me in everything!”
Her mother smiled gently. “You’re a teenager. And our child. Let us take care of you.”
Silvia shook her head, and as much as she tried not to burden them, she couldn’t help herself. “I wouldn’t know anyone at my new school.” Which was such a trivial problem compared to the sacrifices her parents had made to start a new life in this country that she was embarrassed for speaking it aloud.
Her mother didn’t seem to mind. She reached over and patted her leg. “I know, sweetheart. But your father is worried he won’t be able to find work here.”
“Okay, but… Chicago? Do we have to go so far?”
“They have a large Latino community, so we won’t stand out as much. And we’ll be even farther away from the border, which can’t hurt. But we won’t leave unless it becomes necessary. We have friends here too.”
Of course they did. They would each be saying goodbye to familiar faces and places. Silvia had no right to feel sorry for herself. When they reached Pride High, she pulled over and went around to the back of the truck to take out her ten-speed bike. Her mother helped and remained standing there, even when Silvia handed her the keys.
“Everything is going to be okay,” Elena said. “I promise.”
Silvia hugged her mother and kissed her on the cheek. Then she rolled her bike over to the rack to lock it up. She felt the prickly sweat and thudding palpitations of anxiety, which were all-too-familiar, despite being mostly absent over the past month. She had felt empowered when rescuing her dad from the hospital. And when shutting Ricky down after he'd seen what he shouldn’t have. In both instances, Silvia hadn’t let fear cripple her. She had taken action to protect the people she loved.
Now she felt powerless again. There had to be something she could do! Or someone who could help. She thought of Omar and his wealthy family, Mindy and her compassionate heart, Anthony and his thoughtful sensitivity. Each was a source of comfort in a crisis, but she didn’t see how any of her friends could help. With one exception.