“You know what? I think it’s too quiet in here,” Audrey spoke up, gently gripping my wrist for just a second before pushing away from the table. “I actually have the Bluetooth speaker I use for class in my bag, so I think I’ll turn on some nice dinner music. Blake, do you mind?”
She stood beside me and looked down into my eyes with expectancy while I struggled to pull together the words to reply. “U-uh, no. I don’t mind,” I barely uttered, my voice gruff and rasped. “That’d be nice.”
“Great. I hope that’s okay with everybody else,” she said sweetly, but before anyone could reply, she ran into the living room.
In her absence, I surveyed the silent table. My father watched my mom with apprehension, his hands clasped against his mouth. Mom seethed from her seat across from me, keeping her eyes on the table and never daring to look my way. Jake continued to eat as if nothing had happened, but Freddy’s jubilance had dwindled during the argument and the slow bites he took, the downcast of his eyes, filled me with a guilt I’d never known before. My mother had started it, and I stood by what I’d said, but my behavior had been uncalled for. Now I felt like a raving lunatic, a monster, and with my eyes on this little kid, I was overrun by the desire to do better. To be better.
What do you think about that, Travetti?
“Hey, Freddy,” I said, speaking with a calm softness in my tone, and he cautiously met my gaze. “Your dad told me you really like dogs.” His head bobbed gently, shyly. “Did Jake tell you he has a dog?”
Freddy whipped his head to stare incredulously up at my brother. “You do?”
“Mickey’s my dog,” Jake replied, nodding. “He’s a Golden Retriever and a real good boy.”
“Where is he?” Freddy demanded to know, jumping up and down in his seat. “I wanna see!”
Walk the Moon’s catchy and infectious “One Foot” drifted along the air at a respectable volume and Audrey emerged from the living room. “Goodness, I just love this band,” she said, easing back into her seat and meeting my eye. I held onto her gaze, hoping she could hear the ‘thank you’ resounding through my mind, and when she smiled, I assumed she had.
“Mickey doesn’t live here,” Jake told Freddy, moving his head to the music, completely offbeat and just as endearing. “He lives at my house.”
“I want Mickey to be here,” Freddy pouted, slumping back into his seat and grabbing his last taco.
“Well,” I said, taking a bite of mine, “maybe you and your mom could take a ride with me this weekend. We can go see Jake, and you can meet Mickey.”
Mom grabbed a hold of my gaze with a how dare you stare. As though I had some nerve inviting them along. And maybe I shouldn’t have. Perhaps I should’ve asked. But wasn’t she the one who’d told me to meet someone? Wasn’t this why she was taking Jake away from me in the first place, because he was, in her words, preventing me from having a life?
But instead of protesting, she turned to Audrey with a smile. “We’d love to have you, if you aren’t doing anything.”
Audrey offered her a catching grin and nodded. “That sounds nice, thank you so much.” She gestured toward her son. “Freddy really does love dogs, but both his dad and I live places where we can’t have any. I’d love to get him one, though. Maybe someday.”
I lifted my brows questioningly as I turned to her. “Your parents don’t let you have pets where you’re at?”
She shook her head. “They don’t want the place to smell like animals, in the event I ever move out and they have to get someone else in there. And Jason lives in a pet-free apartment complex.”
I nodded contemplatively and glanced at Jake. There had never been anything stopping me from keeping pets at my house. It was mine; I could do whatever the fuck I wanted. Still, I had always used the excuse that I was too busy with work to take care of a dog. But now, I was aware that I kept similar hours to my parents and they managed to take care of one just fine. And now, I couldn’t stop thinking how Jake’s dog made him happy, more than just about anything else. If I could convince my parents to let Jake stay with me, that would mean the dog would be with me, too. I’d have to make that work, because what kind of selfish prick would keep him away from his pet?
With a decision made to have a conversation with my dad, I settled back into eating as Jake belted out the chorus, wrong lyrics and all. Audrey clapped her hands happily and said to him, “Music makes everything better, doesn’t it?”
I took a bite of my taco and nodded as I bumped my arm against hers. “It really does,” I agreed.
And apparently, so did she.
***
The candles were blown out and the cake was eaten. My parents and I laid out a stack of presents in front of my brother and we all gathered around to watch him unwrap Lego sets, clothes, a stack of coloring books, and an arsenal of DVDs he’d never get around to watching because he was always too busy replaying Gremlins. Audrey shocked the hell out of me when she reached into her oversized tote bag and revealed a wrapped gift.
“Happy birthday, Jake,” she said, placing it in front of him.
“Audrey got me a present!” He clapped with exuberance before tearing the paper off to reveal a set of Daniel Tiger puzzles. He held up the box, showing it off and ogling the colorful illustrations. “Wow,” he drawled, stunned and impressed.
“Do you like it?” she asked, struggling to quell the amusement that crinkled at her eyes.
“You betcha!”
Freddy leaned over to point at the packaging. “I have these, too.”
“You can help me if they get real hard,” Jake offered, nodding and staring, still transfixed on Daniel and all his friends.
“They’re easy,” Freddy insisted. “I’ll show you. Can I—”
“Uh, hey, pal,” Audrey cut in regrettably. “It’s getting pretty late and you need a bath. I think maybe you should play with puzzles another day.”
I nodded. “Yeah, Jake. You have to wake up early tomorrow, too.”
And at that, my parents stood and announced it was time for them and Jake to head home. I helped them carry Jake’s gifts to the car while Jake continued to marvel over the box of puzzles. Then, we all stood in the living room as it was time to say our goodbyes.
“It was lovely meeting you, Audrey,” my father said, smiling genuinely and bending to give her a warm hug. “You have a great kid.”
Seemingly taken aback, but by what, I didn’t know, Audrey faltered in her smile and returned the hug. “Thank you so much. And it was very nice meeting you.” Then, as she stood back, she added, “And you have a couple of pretty great kids, too.”
Dad seemed startled, looking from Audrey to flit his gaze between Jake and me. Something shifted in his gaze as he barely bobbed his head. “Yeah. I guess I do,” he replied quietly, still nodding and looking at us both.
Mom’s departure was a little chillier but just as genuine, with a gentle grasp of Audrey’s hand and a tight smile. “We’ll see you this weekend,” she said, before lifting her other hand in a slight wave as she added, “See you soon, Freddy.”