“Are you kidding? Man, that would be fun to do. It’d be no trouble. Might take a little bit, just because I’d need to do it between the stuff for the shop, but we’ve got it in great shape down there. I’ve got time.”
Dad smiled at Luke. No, it wasn’t a smile. He was beaming. “I can almost see it. But the only way I’ll agree is if you let me pay you.”
“For materials,” Luke insisted. “That’s all. I’m not a contractor. I’m not licensed. Some things will need to be done by the pros, like counter installation. Let me get some numbers together for you and for now, we’ll just agree to talk about it. What do you say?”
I didn’t hear my father respond, just watched him grinning and shaking Luke’s hand and looking thrilled while I panicked.
Luke wasn’t wrong—this place was a time machine, and that was exactly the way I wanted it. I’d thought Dad did too, but he’d been thinking about this, wanting to do it, and he’d never told me. Probably because he was worried that I’d feel exactly like I did. Like I’d been betrayed. Like he was ready to move on. Like he wanted to forget.
But I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to forget anything. I didn’t want to change anything. Because it would start here with the wallpaper and the kitchen where Mom had taught me to cook, and it would end with her closet cleaned out and her things gone, donated, lost forever. Where would I go when I needed her if her closet was empty? Because even now, I had a little spot under her dresses where I’d sit when I needed her. Where I’d imagine I could still smell her perfume. Where her favorite polka-dot dress hung, where the sweater with the big cable knit waited for me to slip into when I needed a hug.
I took a breath, pressed my thoughts down until they were flat. Folded them until they were small. Tucked them away in a drawer in my mind. And carried on.
I scooped up some flowers, and when Luke saw me, he followed suit, as I’d hoped. The conversation shifted, as I’d also hoped.
“Be back, Daddy,” I said with levity I didn’t feel. “Twenty minutes, and your belly will be happy.”
He chuckled, navigating into the living room. “All right. Meanwhile, I’m gonna get warmed up so I can properly whip you two on the track.”
Luke followed me to my room, setting his flowers down next to mine on the bed while I busied myself prepping. I turned on my ring light and moved things around in front of my backdrop to stage a shot.
“Wow,” he said from behind me. “This is where you take all your pictures?”
“Mmhmm.” Avoiding his eyes, I sorted through the flowers, making an arrangement almost without thought.
“We should set up a bigger space at the shop. Somewhere you can shoot installations or … I don’t know. Somewhere with room for you to really spread out.”
“I don’t need more room,” I said a little more firmly than I’d meant.
As usual, Luke didn’t pick up on it. He stepped between the ring light and the backdrop, turning around with a smile on his face. That smile melted my worries like chocolate in the sun—sticky and messy and impossible to clean up, just like Luke Bennet.
But I was smiling back, simply because there was no choice to be made—whenever he smiled, I smiled.
An idea struck. I handed him the bouquet and picked up my camera.
He gave me a look that was somehow both suspicious and amused. “What do you want me to do with these?”
“Look hot,” I answered, looking through the lens.
He laughed, looking down at the bouquet, blushing bashfully. I pressed the button, the shutter clicking to the same mad beat as my heart. He was so earnest, the compliment affording a rare view of modesty so often hidden by his unwavering confidence.
I glanced at the screen. It was perhaps the hottest photograph I’d ever seen, featuring two of the most beautiful things in my world—flowers and Luke Bennet.
The only thing that would have made it better was if he’d been shirtless.
I sighed dreamily. “Really, you must be an alien or something. Normal people aren’t this good at everything. I should start calling you Ace.”
He made a flippant sound, stepping toward me so he could look himself. “Trust me, there’s plenty I’m bad at.”
“Name one thing.”
“Relationships,” he said without hesitating, but kept talking to cover the admission. “Advanced math. Cooking. Ice skating.”
“Ice skating?” I echoed around a laugh.
He shrugged. “Weak ankles.”
When I laughed louder, he smiled, set his flowers on the bed, and stepped into me. His big hand circled my wrist, his thumb shifting against my palm.
“Are you okay?” he asked simply, but those three little words held a quiet knowledge that threatened to break me open.
Luke Bennet saw through me more often than I liked.
I opened my mouth to say yes. To lie, to hide how I felt because it was irrational. Because admitting the truth would hurt.
I wanted to say yes, reassure him that I was fine. But with Luke searching my eyes for the truth, I couldn’t tell him anything but the truth he sought. “I don’t want to change the house, Luke. I don’t want the wallpaper gone, and I don’t want the kitchen to be different. I don’t want any of it to be different. Because if it’s different, I won’t remember. I’ll forget everything. I’ll forget her.” Tears pricked the corners of my eyes, the words gone, cut off by the squeeze of my throat.
The lines of his face softened, his brows drawing together. His hands, so warm and strong, framed my face, tilting it up so our eyes were locked.
“I’m sorry,” he said gently. “I’m so sorry, Tess. When your dad said … well, I just thought …” He took a breath and let it out slow. “It sounded like he wanted a fresh start, and I didn’t even take a minute to consider you might not want the same. If I had, I’d have known better. I’d have asked what you wanted before telling you all the ways I’d rip your home apart.”
“It’s not your fault,” I assured him, leaning into his palm. “I think Dad does want a fresh start, and I’d never stand in the way of that. This is his home. She was just as important to him as she was to me. So if this is what he wants, I’ll do it. I just don’t want to.” Tears fell—stupid, heavy, fat tears that I didn’t want any more than crown molding in my living room. I tried to look down.
But he held my face where it was. “Tess, let me make you a promise.” He waited to make sure I was listening, his face somber and sincere. “I promise you, if I end up helping do this, I will not erase your mother from your home. There are ways to keep things and change them. You’re not going to lose her. I’ll promise you that over everything.”
I nodded, my face twisted up and a sob lodged in my throat, one I couldn’t swallow, no matter how hard I tried. And Luke pressed a kiss to my forehead before wrapping me up in the safety of his arms, shifting his weight to rock me.
He let me cry as his promise sank in. I knew without a doubt that he’d uphold it with all his power.
And for the first time, I wished with all my heart that I could keep Luke Bennet for my own.