I walked out of the building but didn’t leave. Every instinct told me to knock on the door again. I couldn’t shake the feeling that if I left, this divide between us would grow, but I was afraid that if I pushed, I’d make things worse.
I’d been there for her through highs and lows for so many years, and now I couldn’t, and it was killing me. I wanted to make her happy, but for the first time, I was completely at a loss as to how to do that. I sat on a bench for a long time, and would’ve probably stayed longer, but Mick called.
“Hunter, can you come over later today to give me a hand with the thermostat? It’s giving me headaches again.”
“Sure, I’ll be there in about an hour.”
Better to be surrounded by Mick and Amelia, two people I respected and loved, than alone with my own thoughts.
When I arrived at Mick and Amelia’s apartment, Ryker was there too, to my surprise.
“Hunter, long time no see,” Ryker greeted me.
“Hey! What are you doing here?”
“Mick asked for help with the thermostat.”
Which begged the question... why was I there?
“Right. Is it working now?”
Mick nodded. “I think Ryker and I sorted it out. But you can double-check. I have some beers ready after that. We can watch the basketball game.”
He pointed to the couch and the enormous TV in front of it. Mick had what he liked to call a man cave in one of the bedrooms. In addition to the TV, he also had a workstation where he tinkered with wood.
I inspected the thermostat for a few minutes before joining Ryker and Mick on the couch. “Everything is looking good.”
Footsteps caught my attention. Amelia joined us, smiling. “Boys, thank you for fixing the thermostat.”
Something was very wrong. That was the only reason she’d ever show up here. The man cave was her least favorite place in the apartment. “So dark in here. It stresses me out,” she always said.
Ryker frowned. We exchanged glances. He was just as miffed about it as I was.
When Amelia zeroed in on me, it quickly became obvious that I was what was wrong.
“Hunter, I’ve heard some worrying news.”
“How?”
“Tess brought me up to date.”
“Right.” Of course she had. I glanced to Mick, who was focusing on the TV as if he didn’t want to miss one second of the commercials.
“I take it you didn’t really need my help?”
Amelia was the one who answered. “Well, no, Ryker was already here. But then Tess said you’d been sitting on a bench in front of her building for a while, so clearly, you needed our help.”
“Knew the thermostat was the easiest way to get you here,” Mick said.
I chuckled, because it was true. Whenever Mick called to ask for my help with anything, I always pitched in.
Ryker nodded. “Listen to whatever Mom has to say. She always knows best.”
Amelia looked at her youngest through narrowed eyes. “So, if I know best, why do you never listen when I tell you to stop acting like you don’t ever want to bring a girl home?”
Ryker shook his head. “Walked into that one on my own. No one to blame but myself.”
“You’ll figure it out, Hunter,” Amelia said gently. “Just give yourself time. Give Josie some time. You can come here after work for dinner if you don’t want to go home.”
“Wait a second, whenever you think I need advice, you talk my ear off, but all Hunter gets is you’ll figure it out? I feel like a second-class citizen right now.”
“Don’t be so dramatic. You two are different.” Winking, Amelia patted his shoulder. “I need to tailor my advice accordingly.”
The game began shortly afterward, and we all watched in silence.
But I wasn’t really watching. I was... figuring things out.
I couldn’t believe I’d left for the event that evening. I should have stayed home and been her anchor, the way she’d been mine that night when she’d found me on the treadmill. She’d just been there for me. How could I have left? How could I have thought that was what she needed? We challenged each other because we both had fiery personalities. We were bound to clash from time to time. I loved that fiery, funny woman. She added so much to my life. I’d learned to enjoy life every day, not just the big achievements. Learned to try out new things and let go.
I hung on to this thought, feeling like I’d made a major breakthrough. By the time the game was over, I was feeling one step closer to victory.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Josie
The best part about spending time with Tess? She was so bubbly and full of energy that it was catchy. And we had so much work to do. How she’d thought she’d finish everything by herself was beyond me.
On Sunday, we had our very first semi healthy meal—chicken salad with chips and guacamole on the side.
“You still haven’t said one word about Hunter. Oh, okay. You’re still glaring when I bring him up. More chips?”
“I’ll never say no to that.”
“I’m thinking, we need to shake things up a bit,” Tess said once we’d finished our salads, placing her hands on her hips and scrunching her face up in concentration.
“Uh-oh. Should I be afraid?”
“What? Not at all. When have my plans ever been dangerous?”
“Umm... when haven’t they been dangerous?”
“Girls’ night out?”
I shook my head. “Your cold is still not one hundred percent over.”
Tess continued undeterred. “Girls’ night in?”
I laughed. “I forgot you never give up.”
“Ha! Nothing is impossible if I’m making it my mission, and I totally am.”
I smiled, despite myself. Tess did her nickname justice. She was a damn hurricane. And camping here, in her apartment, I felt bad.
“Tess, have you ever just... felt lost? Like you’re not sure what’s best?”
“You’re talking about your career?”
“No, about Hunter. I love him. So much. I’m just afraid that I’m mucking things up with him. Being his friend was always so easy... I’m not used to things being strained between us.”
“Is there something more that you’re afraid of?”
I swallowed, deciding to own up to all my fears. Tess would give it to me straight.
“I’m afraid that maybe we got carried away, what with the marriage and living together, but that we’re first and foremost friends... I mean, if he hadn’t needed my help, we would have stayed just friends forever.”
“Ha! No, you wouldn’t have. You two always had this spark I loved. And of course, you’re going to have growing pains. Honestly, I think that’s true of any marriage or relationship. Everything happened so fast between the two of you, though. I can understand that you’re afraid. Just take your time. And as for your question... Josie, I’m human. Of course, I’ve had my moments of doubt and uncertainty. After Dad left, Mom was depressed for months. She tried to hide it, but it didn’t work. And for a while, we just let her do it, thinking it would pass. I mean, we were kids, didn’t know any better. But then after a while, we realized we had to help. Every time we saw her disappear into herself, instead of leaving her alone, we’d take her out and about and just be silly.”