But her heart wanted more. Then the faces of her clients filled her head—women who had crawled into her office, shards of their former selves, all because they had given too much of themselves away in the name of love.
Blair had lived through the pain of a broken heart once, and once was enough.
No, she’d thought long and hard about marrying Neil. It made perfect sense, so there was no point in reconsidering now.
Finally, Megan sighed. “Blair, talk to us.”
“About what?”
Megan opened her mouth, but Libby interrupted before she could say anything. “Girl talk. When was the last time we had a good chat?”
“Are you insane?” Blair nearly shouted. “There are a dozen women out there who never cared much for me in high school. They would just love to find every little flaw I have and shove it in my face. Then there’s Neil’s family, who wouldn’t know fun if it bit them in the ass. We can’t leave those wild hyenas with your mother so we can chat.”
Megan grinned. “I left a family dinner before my wedding to run off with Josh. You can afford to give your friends a few minutes. Besides, Gram can entertain them until we go back out there.”
“Blair, you’re overwhelmed, and it’s okay. It’s your party, so you can cry if you want to,” Libby teased.
“I don’t cry!” Blair pointed a finger in her face. “And I don’t need any help! I can do it myself!”
“Of course you can, Blair,” Megan said softly. “No one is questioning that. But you’ve got a lot on your plate right now with all the fuss about the ring, not to mention your job hinging on the wedding.” She gave Blair a sad look. “And Garrett.” When Blair opened her mouth to ask her how she knew about her job, Megan gave her a weak smile. “Libby told me. You should have called me.”
Blair shook her head, irritated by the tears burning behind her eyes. “I can handle it.” But there was no force behind the words.
“We know you can,” Libby said quietly.
“What do you want me to say?” she asked defensively.
There was a knock at the back door. “Megan?” Knickers called through the door. “Is everything okay in there? I thought I heard shouting.”
“We’re all excited over this cake!” Libby said.
“Oh . . . okay. Are you coming out soon?”
“Yes,” Blair said, heading for the door.
“Not yet!” Megan yelled, blocking the door. “We’re still working on the cake.”
“Well, okay . . .”
They heard her clomp off and Libby hopped onto a barstool. “The sooner we get our answer, the sooner we’ll let you out of here. Why don’t you start with what’s going on between you and Garrett?”
Blair’s preservation instinct sprang into action before she even realized what she was doing. “You want do to the sharing thing? How about we start with what’s going on with you and Noah?”
Her friend folded her hands on the table and rolled her eyes. “Fine, if you want to start with me, we will, but you have to agree to answer our questions too.”
Blair put her hands on her hips. “Fine.” She figured she’d badger Libby with enough questions to exasperate her into giving up her witch-hunt. “Now tell us about Noah.”
“Quit trying to make something out of it that’s not there. We’re just friends.”
“A friend who spends the night?” Megan asked.
“He sleeps on the sofa,” Libby protested good-naturedly. “That’s not the topic of discussion. And don’t help her deflect, Megan.”
“Why not?” Blair asked, leaning against the bar counter. “I thought we were having girl talk.”
Megan shot a glance out the back windows, her brow wrinkling with worry. Despite all her posturing, Megan would soon cave to the societal demand to appease her mother and her guests. Blair crossed her arms, feeling a bit evil. Better to feel evil and in control than on the verge of a panic attack.
Suddenly she realized how much the three of them had changed. Once they’d known everything about each other. It made sense that their friendship had changed—they all had their own lives, their own careers—but both Megan and Libby had found close relationships with other people. Blair had been stuck in the same place for years: alone.
The thought of being alone forever was suddenly terrifying, but then she reminded herself she wouldn’t be alone. She’d have Neil. Why didn’t that make her feel better?
Libby groaned. “I don’t expect you two to understand, which is why I haven’t told you much about it. I knew you’d react exactly this way.” She shrugged. “We’re friends, end of story. Other than this week, we haven’t seen each other since last month when he was here for business.”
“And Mitch is good with this?” Blair asked, intentionally sounding judgmental.
Libby gave them a tight smile. “Mitch trusts me, while you two obviously don’t.” Strangely enough, she didn’t sound offended. It was more as if she were stating a fact. Then she turned her attention on Blair. “But it’s easier to focus on my relationships than your own, isn’t it?”
Blair lifted her chin. “There’s nothing to discuss, and there is no plural ‘relationships.’ Just the one.”
“What’s going on with Garrett?” Megan asked.
She waved her hand in frustration. “Nothing you don’t already know. He’s Neil’s cousin, so he’s a groomsman now, thanks to their domineering grandmother . . . who, by the way, creeps me out. She watches everything like a damn eagle. What woman drags her grandson to a wedding shower? And why did he agree to come?” Her voice rose, and she knew she was losing control once more.
Megan leaned forward. “We all know his grandmother dragged him here. That’s not why we’re hiding in my kitchen while Neil’s niece and nephew destroy my parents’ backyard. How do you feel about him being here?”
She kept her voice cold. “I’m unhappy about it, and I have every right to be. What woman wants her ex-boyfriend at her wedding shower?”
“Blair,” Megan protested. “Josh told me it was pretty obvious there were some major sparks between you and Garrett. You can’t ignore that. Especially since you and Neil have none.”
Her eyes narrowed. “We have sparks.”
“Oh, please!” Libby snorted. “We all saw that kiss with Neil. Talk about awkward. If we counted on your chemistry to start a fire in a blizzard, we’d freeze to death. There is nothing there.”
“He caught me off guard,” Blair said in defense. “Besides, there’s more to a relationship than sparks.”
“Surely you don’t believe that,” Libby said softly. “Why won’t you tell us how you feel?”
“Again with the feelings,” Blair moaned. “Why do we have to discuss feelings?”
Megan frowned. “Because no matter what front you present to the world, you are not a cyborg. We’re your friends; we know you are actually capable of emotion.”
Blair lifted her eyebrows. “Cyborg?”
Megan shook her head and made a dismissive gesture with one hand. “Josh’s influence, but so not the point.”