“Why wouldn’t she tell you?” Blair asked. “You two are going through this pregnancy together, and besides, you’re sisters-in-law now.”
“Libby’s embarrassed.”
“Embarrassed? Why?”
“She’s worried she’s already failing at motherhood.”
“Already?” Blair asked in disbelief. “She’s barely pregnant, and besides, she’s going to be an amazing mother.”
“You know Libby,” Megan said as the elevator doors opened, and the two women stepped inside. “She’s full of insecurities when it comes to her parents. She’s terrified she’ll fail because of her role models—or lack thereof, I should say.”
“That’s ridiculous. Libby is one of the most giving people I know, and giving’s like the core of motherhood, right? Which is why I’ll never be a mother. I can’t even give Garrett what he needs.”
Megan’s eyes widened. “Are you and Garrett having problems?”
“No.” Blair paused. “I don’t know.”
Megan was surprisingly quiet during the short walk to the restaurant. When the waitress came to take their drink order, Megan ordered her bacon cheeseburger and a water, then turned to Blair. “You ready to order?”
Blair laughed. “I haven’t even had a chance to look at the menu yet.”
“How hard can it be? You always order a salad.”
She did always order a salad. Was it because she was like Allison, worried that Garrett wouldn’t love her if she gained weight?
No, Garrett wasn’t like that. He loved her, and his love wasn’t dependent on her hip size.
“That’s an awful lot of thinking over a salad,” the waitress said.
To hell with it. “Give me a cheeseburger too.”
Megan laughed in surprise.
“And we’ll both take French fries,” Blair added. “And a side order of onion rings.”
The waitress walked away, and Megan covered Blair’s hand with her own. “Now tell me what’s going on.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Do you have plans tonight for Valentine’s Day?”
Blair laughed, but it was hollow. “We don’t do Valentine’s Day, remember? It’s a commercial holiday.”
“Then why do you sound irritated that you don’t have plans?”
Blair rested her face in her hands. “I don’t know. That’s what has me screwed up. I hate Valentine’s Day, but I want Garrett to want to do something anyway. How stupid is that?”
“While I agree it’s a commercial holiday, it is a day to show the person you love how much you care about them. There’s nothing wrong with wanting Garrett to show you that he loves you.”
Blair shook her head. “Garrett isn’t the problem. I’m the problem.”
“What does that mean?”
“I can’t give him what he wants.”
“I don’t believe that. That man loves you. Look at everything he did to stop your wedding to Neil. You are what he wants.”
Blair leaned closer. “He told me his old boss offered him a lot more money to return to San Diego.”
Megan held her gaze for several seconds. “Does he want to go back to San Diego?”
“He says he doesn’t…”
“You don’t believe him?”
“Why did he bring it up?” Blair asked.
Megan shook her head. “Maybe because he was honored and flattered that his old boss wanted him back so much and he wanted to share it with his wife.”
Blair groaned. “I’m such an idiot. I told him to take it and go without me. But I don’t blame him if he wants to. I’ve been impossible to live with since Christmas.”
“Oh, Blair.” Megan was silent when the waitress brought their drinks, then sighed when she walked away. “Did you ever stop to think you’re more like Libby than you’ll admit?”
Blair’s back stiffened. “Libby and I couldn’t be more different than night and day.”
“That’s a crock of bullshit if I ever heard it.”
“How can you seriously call us alike?”
Seriousness washed over Megan’s face. “You both think you’re unlovable.”
Blair rolled her eyes. “What psychobabble are you talking about?”
“Blair, come on. Why did you tell Garrett to go to San Diego?”
“I don’t know!” she said defensively and then shrugged. “I don’t want to be his anchor.”
“His anchor? Why would you be his anchor?”
“Look, Megan,” Blair said. “You and I both know I’m impossible to live with.”
“And yet Garrett’s in the thick of it with you. He knew exactly who you were when he tried to win you back and when he married you. He knew exactly who you were when he decided to leave San Diego and start a practice with just the two of you. Some would even argue that’s more of a commitment than marriage.”
“It’s not called the honeymoon period for nothing, Megan. The magic is over and reality has set in. Maybe the shine of living with me has rubbed off. Can you honestly tell me you and Josh are all sunshine and roses? At least Garrett and I had been together for a year. You knew Josh four days before you married him.”
Blair expected Megan to get upset—wanted her to be so she’d back off—but she gave Blair an expressionless stare. “Go on. What else?”
“What else what?”
Megan rested her forearms on the table and clasped her hands. “Keep lashing out, Blair. That’s what you do when someone starts getting close enough to make you feel vulnerable. But guess what? Josh has made me more confident about who I am. So take your best shot, because the tougher your barbs, the closer we get to the heart of the matter. I’m your best friend, Blair. I’ll go to hell and back for you, so bring it.”
Blair’s mouth dropped open. “What the hell happened to you?”
“I’ve done a lot of soul searching. I’ve figured out why I dated guys who cheated on me. Now you need to figure out why you keep pushing away the people who love you.”
“You’re full of shit, Megan.”
Megan winked. “That too. Pregnancy hormones are notorious for constipation.”
“TMI, Megs,” Blair said, shuddering.
“Nice try. I’m still going to make you face your demons.”
“Wrong holiday,” Blair said dryly.
“Just don’t push Garrett away. He loves you, Blair. Why can’t you just accept that he loves you?”
She shrugged at Megan, offering a weak smile, as if to say I don’t know. Although the question wasn’t really if she could accept that Garrett loved her. She knew he did. But would this be enough for them?
Chapter Four
“Now boarding flight 265 to Denver,” the overhead speaker blared.
Garrett looked at his watch for the umpteenth time, then leaned back his head and breathed a sigh of relief, his anxiety dropping a level. Finally. He was going home. Just a short stop in Denver and then he would get home and could make everything right with Blair. He’d hoped she would call him back, but it had been radio silence. He told himself it didn’t mean anything. They weren’t a clingy couple, but he couldn’t shake the feeling something big was on the horizon and it made him nervous as hell. He needed to convince her he wasn’t going anywhere as long as she wanted him, because after pouting for two hours, he’d realized she was pushing him away because she was scared.