As I unwrap the item from the tissue paper, I can’t stop the gasp that escapes from my lips, my heart skipping a beat. It’s a white lace and rather revealing white dress that is see-through in seductive places. My cheeks flame with a blush at the thought of wearing it. As I hold it up to the light, my heart races.
It’s so beautiful. Luxurious and obviously expensive. And my size.
As I press it up against my chest, the significance isn’t lost on me. Tonight, Club X’s theme is all white. I can hardly wait. I set the dress on the table, but something brushes against my arm. I look down.
There’s a note attached to the dress. I pick it up and my heart only speeds up even faster as I read the simple words.
I’ll see you tonight, my flower.
Your Sir.
Chapter 6
Joseph
As I wait at the long, mahogany bar at the front entrance of Club X just outside of the foyer, I take another look at the text from my brother. I don’t know why I do this to myself. I have no intention of texting him back. There’s no reason for me to be involved at all with my family anymore. They had nothing to offer me and I have nothing to offer them. Despite what my brother seems to think.
Roberto may be a few years younger, but he’ll be the one taking over the familia. I don’t need to listen to a damn thing that he says right now though. I sure as fuck don’t have to listen to my father either.
I’m not getting sucked back into that life. I have no intention of going back to them. I’m not going to be a puppet for them. I’m not going to take over like I was supposed to. I played my part and took the fall; I’m done with them.
I don’t ever expect to live a normal life. I know that’s not meant for a man like me.
I wasn’t brought up to be normal. There are things that I’ve done that are unforgivable. The sins of my past will always stay with me and they made me into the man I am. Whether I like that or not, it’s true.
My own mother was a whore. My father, Angelo and the Don of the Levi familia, wanted sons, so he knocked several up, one after the other, until he was given two boys. I grew up surrounded by prostitutes and drug cartels. I’ve sat through dinners that were ended with gunshots or stabbings. It was normal, there was never a moment where safety was a possibility. There was a promise of loyalty, but in actuality any and everyone was waiting to stab one another in the back.
That’s the kind of life I’d be living. It’s the shit that I lived through. Even when I left the familia, my past followed me. My name still follows me.
Not responding to my brother, half-brother really, sends a strong message. I don’t give a fuck though. I have no intention of sending one back. There’s no reason for us to meet up. We have nothing in common. I have a conscience. It may have taken me a long time to find a way out, but I have a desire to lead a different life, even if I am already condemned to hell. My brother doesn’t. All he cares about is money, greed and selfishness. I wouldn’t be surprised if he kills my own father one day. Not that I’ll shed any tears over it. They’re both despicable for what they’ve done.
I have enough money so I never need to work a day in my life again, one of the unforeseen bonuses of having the Romano’s funds sent to my account. It was meant to be evidence used against me, but never came to fruition. I need a new life, I need something to look forward to. Something to give me purpose.
I think back to Lilly, my hand gently start swirling the whiskey in the tumbler. She more than interest me. I click the button on the side of the phone, before slipping it back into my pocket and take a swig. The burn does nothing to sooth the sickness stirring in the pit of my stomach at the thought of Lilly not coming back.
I know I need to be gentle with her. I can’t be the ruthless man that I used to be. I need to hide the darkness that’s inside me as best as I can until I have her fully and completely trusting me. I need to get the fuck out of here too.
The couples walk around me, the submissives completely unknowing, nor do they care who I am. Most of their eyes are focused on the ground. Some of the men walk by me without taking a second look, but most of them hold contempt for me. The newspapers crucified me, as they should have. My name is practically a slur. I look up at the one man that dares to give me a hard look. The moment my eyes meet his, he breaks his gaze pretending to stare past me. Fucking coward.
I look to my right signaling the bartender for one more. There’s a two drink limit in Club X for obvious reasons, but my tolerance is high enough now that the drinks hardly have an effect on me. As the bartender catches my eye, I notice a man to my right staring at me once again.
It’s Zander. Zander Payne. I’m well aware of who he is and what he’s capable of. Even if most of the men in here have no idea. I snort at the thought. He’s someone the men here should truly be afraid of.
There’s an odd look on Zander’s face. A look like he has something to say.
I hold his gaze as the bartender sets my glass of whiskey down on the counter in front of me. I wrap my fingers around the glass and bring it to my lips not moving my eyes off Zander. He doesn’t drop his gaze either.
I’ve never said a single word to the man. I’ve never said a word to any of the men here. I have no fucking reason to.
I only came as a favor to Kiersten. She was worried about me. She’s always worried about everything and everyone.
As the whiskey burns down my throat and fills my chest with the heat I’ve come to rely on for comfort, Zander finally walks towards me with purposeful steps. He has to walk around a few of the couples. One girl notices Zander walking by; she’s sitting on a stool leaning forward, her white lingerie wrapped around her body and tied around her neck, pushes her breasts up and out. Her head lowers until she looks up at him through her thick lashes, attempting to be submissive, although she’s doing a poor job of it. But he ignores her.
Just as he ignores all the women here. No one else may see it, but I know the only reason Zanders here is for business. He likes to keep an eye on his assets. He likes to have an eye over everyone around him. That’s just the man he is. And I truly admire it, although it’s hard to admit that. I do quite the opposite, I try to stay away from anything and everything that reminds me of what I used to be. The only problem is I have no idea what that leaves me with.
“Mr. J? Is that what you go by here?” Zander asks me, standing a few feet from me as he rests his hand against the bar, in a seemingly casual stance.
“I prefer Sir.” I set the whiskey down and leave it there, squaring my shoulders and waiting for him to say whatever it is that’s on his mind.
“Ah,” He says easily. This is the way he approaches all things in his life. With the casual air that makes him seem harmless. Charming even. But I know what he’s capable of. I’ve seen it firsthand. Everyone owes him. But me. And I won’t be making any business deals with a cunning shark like him.
“Sir?” He lets out a small laugh while shoving his hands into his pockets and looking past me. “I was wondering when you were going to begin indulging.”
I don’t respond to him. I’m not sure if he is referring to Lilly, or my bid on the auction. Either way I don’t give a fuck. What I do in here and outside of the club is none of his business. The less this man knows about me the better. I look past him, towards the front entrance waiting for Lilly. I know that she received my package. I’m only curious whether or not she’s decided to obey me, to wear the dress I’ve given her and to come without any undergarments on. The latter is what I’m truly curious about. Not only did I give her the order yesterday but, from what I know about her, it’s out of her element to be so brazen.