His words should fill me with overwhelming excitement, but they don’t.
My desire ebbs somewhat as I stare into his hungry eyes, a feeling of wariness washing over my limbs. I wasn’t expecting it to go this far. Him getting me off with his fingers was fine, but I’m a virgin. And though he’s sexy as sin, and turns me on like nothing I’ve ever felt, I’m not going to give myself to him. Not like this. I don’t even know his name.
A part of me wants it badly, though. As my breath comes in frantic pants I can already imagine, him plunging deep inside me with his thick cock, fucking me with a ferocity that would have me screaming with pleasure within seconds.
But I know it’ll be a mistake.
Looking at the absolute hunger in his eyes, I feel the heavy weight of fear pressing down upon my chest, constricting my breathing.
I have to break this off before I cave to the desire he makes so hard to resist.
Lollipop, A voice urges in my head as Sir moves in closer, softly brushing his hard bulge against my leg and causing my skin to prick and my pussy to throb with insatiable need. Say it now before it’s too late!
My skin flushing a deep scarlet shade, I suck in a deep breath, parting my lips to say the words that will bring me to safety.
Before the first syllable escapes my mouth, he surprises me by suddenly releasing me from my binds.
Immediately, I slump to the cold, stone floor covered in sweat, my limbs sore, stinging and red, feeling drained and exhausted, his arm wrapped around my waist and holding me up.
“Are your ankles alright?” he asks me, bending over to massage my wrists, his voice coming out clear.
A feeling of confusion washes over me at the tone of his voice. His demeanor, which was hot and heavy moments before, is replaced by a coolness that makes my skin burn.
He knows you’re hiding something, the voice at the back of my head says as my heart pounds wildly within my chest. And that you were going to safeword him.
I hate not being able to tell him the truth. But I’m not ready. Not ready to tell him, not ready to lose my V-card, I’m not even ready for a real M/s relationship … or whatever this is.
“Yes,” I barely manage with a strained whisper as he helps me to my feet.
My skin stings as he barely bothers to look at me as he examines me in the places where I was bound, making sure that I have good blood flow to those regions.
My lips part to tell him I’m sorry, that I’m a virgin and not sure if I’m ready, but then I close them. I’m not sure he’ll even care to hear my pathetic excuse for denying him. He just seems ready to leave.
And there’s no sense in making things worse.
Our session for tonight is over.
Chapter 8
Joseph
Lilly’s gone for the night. And yet again, I feel as though I’ve scared her off.
It’s my own damn fault, I’m still in shock.
I knew there was an innocence about her; I assumed it was because this lifestyle was new to her. But when my fingers slipped into her tight cunt even deeper, I felt her hymen. I couldn’t believe it. How could she keep something like that from me? The look in her eyes told me everything I needed to know.
I stare at the lush carpet as a couple passes me in the halls of Club X, remembering that look on her face. Scared and vulnerable… and raw. She was completely at my mercy in every way.
No wonder she’s taking this so slow.
This should ward me off of her. I should stay away for her own good. No matter how much she wants this, the mere fact that she’s a virgin is going to make what would be an erotic exploration into something emotional. I’m not an idiot. I won’t be fooled by the notion that she knows better. If I take this from her, there will be an attachment that can’t be undone.
It makes me even more of an asshole that that only fuels my desire to take her. I fucking wanted her right then and there. The moment I realized. I’m damn proud of my restraint, but my reaction made her run away… again. She’ll come back. I won’t let her slip through my fingers. Not that easily.
“Kiersten,” I call out to her as she walks through the main hall of Club X.
Her heels are muted on the carpet and her eyes whip up to me as she purses her lips and searches the empty hall.
“Quiet!” she snaps in a hushed voice, scowling at me and gripping my arm to pull me aside to a darkened corner. It’s comical that the sweet little woman thinks she can pull me around, but I let her. After all, she’s been a close friend of mine for a lifetime, and at this point, she’s the only person I trust.
“That’s not my name here.” Her voice is low and her eyes dart down the hall again, but it’s empty. The theme night has nearly everyone in the dining hall.
A chill goes through my blood. I forget sometimes. “I’m sorry… Madam Lynn,” I give her a small smile and she purses her lips, but I know she’s not angry with me. She’s too forgiving.
“What is it that you want?” she asks, crossing her arms and cocking a brow. I resist the urge to smirk at her. Here she’s in control, the Madame of the house. But I know her too well to look at her the way the other members do.
“I wanted to make a submissive an offer,” I clear my throat and tear my eyes away from hers for a moment. When I look back confusion is etched on her face, so I continue, “Outside of the auction.”
“Oh!” her posture relaxes slightly although she remains skeptical. “And what offer is that?”
“A monthly contract outside of the club. I’m willing to split the fees of course. I’m simply not interested in the charade of the auction.” I try to make my stance and voice casual, but the reality is that I don’t want my flower coming back here. Not until we both know she belongs to me and every person in this club knows to stay far away from her.
Kiersten raises her brow and I add, “no offense.” I don’t at all mind giving the submissive whatever amount she desires and the club the same. The money goes towards the women’s shelters. It’s a good cause I already donate to. For the same reason Kiersten’s chosen it.
It’s not about the money. It’s about ensuring that I’ll get exactly what I want.
I’ve been wanting to take her away from here. I don’t have an interest in engaging in activities here, but I want her. I want to break her. That sweetness about her, I crave it. But I covet her tears of desire more. I see the way her back arched as the braided tails of the whip smacked against her skin. The way she touched the marks with a reverence after being lashed. I could show her so much more. I could give her indescribable sensations, things she’s never dreamed of. And I want to.
All in time, but not here. She’s taking things slowly and going under the radar. I need to take her away now.
“May I ask who?” Kiersten asks with a teasing smile on her lips. She knows exactly who. She’s going to take credit for this, I know she will.
“Lilly.” My flower.
“I’m sorry Joseph, but the rules are in place for a reason, and Lilly is still finding her limits.” Kiersten looks as though she’s ready to leave, and if it were anyone else, I’m sure she would. But it’s me. So she rocks on her heels, waiting for my response.