There are white whips hanging off the end of the bed frame, white riding crops on the wall along with large foreign objects that make me shudder at the thought of what they’re used for. I start to walk to them, my hand at my throat, and as I do, I hear and feel Joseph walking behind me. I can hardly breathe. I stop in my tracks, lowering my head and just trying to breathe. This is why I’m here.
I lift my eyes and nearly laugh.
There’s even a white cage in the corner of the room and a white bench with white leather straps.
I stare in disbelief, wondering how my eyes could have deceived me so. Here I am, enraptured in the upscale beauty of the room, when it’s a Goddamn torture chamber! A very nice, plush comfortable-looking one, but a torture chamber nonetheless.
Anxiety twists my stomach as I stare at these objects, knowing what they’ll be used for. How the hell did I get myself into this?
I look over at Joseph and see his eyes on me. He hasn’t said a word since we’ve walked into the room, content on watching my every move and expression as if trying to read my mind.
I part my lips to ask something, but then close them, my legs feeling weak. I don’t trust myself to speak yet.
To hide my anxiety, I walk over to the closet and open it. It’s pitch dark inside and I have to search around for the light switch.
Once again, I have to keep my jaw off the floor.
Fuck. The closet is huge. It has its own island and tons and tons of space. It’s the kind of closet that every girl dreams about. With a ton of rack space to dump the latest trendy pumps on. But I’m surprised to see it mostly stuffed with feminine clothing; corsets, silk and lace lingerie. It looks like they’re all my size too.
After a moment, I turn off the light and leave the closet, walking back into the bedroom. Feeling stunned.
Joseph is standing there where I left him, his eyes on me. My heart skips a beat at the hunger I see in them. A growing sense of dread rises from the pit of my stomach. I know what that look means. And I know what I haven’t told him.
“This is beautiful,” I say quietly, trying to keep my voice steady, not wanting to betray the anxiety that is twisting my stomach.
An amused twinkle glints in his eyes. “I thought you might like it,” he murmurs, his voice husky and confident.
“I don’t think I’ve ever stayed in such a nice room before,” I say, and then jokingly add, “minus, the whips, chains and cage of course.”
Joseph huffs out an amused chuckle. “Those will have no effect on how well you sleep in that bed. You will find it quite soft, actually.” For the first time, he takes his eyes off my face, casting a quick glance over to the corner of the room where the white cage is. “But if you disobey me…” his voice trails off but I know what he means. It’s almost like he’s itching to see me in the cage.
I slightly shudder, my nipples pebbling. A part of me thinks I would like the cage, I’m turned on by it, if only for a little while, an hour, maybe two, but definitely not for anything longer than that. The thought of being in it for more than several hours, absolutely terrifies me.
I clasp my hands in front of my dress, swinging my shoulders back and forth, trying to shake the nervousness that keeps running through my limbs.
Joseph steps forward, sensing my emotions, stopping a few feet from me. He reaches out and places a hand on my shoulder, halting my rocking. I almost groan at his touch, feeling small shocks where his skin touches mine.
Fuck, what this man does to me.
Up close, I’m enveloped by his masculine scent and it calms me, if only slightly. Jesus, I love how he smells.
“What’s wrong, flower?” he asks me with concern.
I look into his eyes and my heart flips. The hunger is still there, and it’s enough to make my skin prick, my cheeks burning red. I know that it won’t be long before that hunger will demand to be sated. I just need to...I swallow thickly. I need to tell him. I know it’s going to happen soon.
“Can tonight be different?” I blurt out, my heart skipping a beat and then starting to race.
Joseph’s eyes never leave my face. “Can what be different?” his voice sounds so deep and low.
My forehead crinkles as I frown. Is he toying with me? He has to know what I mean with the way he’s been looking at me since I’ve got here and that giant bulge in his pants that he’s done little to hide.
My cheeks still burning, I gesture at the king-sized luxurious bed. “Uh, you know.”
His eyes web as a grin plays across his chiseled jawline. “No, in fact I don’t.”
Okay. Now I know he’s toying with me.
I shake my head. “I just always thought... it’s silly...but I’ve always been...” I search for a way to say what I want without giving myself away. “I’d like this to be outside our contract? I just…can we just pretend I’m not your slave for the first time?”
Joseph shakes his head firmly and my heart falls into my stomach. “I don’t pretend Lilly.”
I search his face for some sign of softening, but his jaw is firm. I don’t think I’ll convince him. My heart races in my chest. All the ways I’ve imagined him fucking me have been ruthless. But right now, I don’t want that.
“Can you be gentle at first?” I ask hopefully. “Just for tonight.”
I see amusement flash in his eyes, but his expression remains flat. “That’s not in my nature.”
It’s hard to keep my face steady as I look at him and my knees from shaking. I don’t know what I should do.
I’ve never had sex before, but now I’m supposed to be able to endure a man his size, who’s going to fuck me like a wild animal?
Holy fuck.
I’m just as scared as I am turned on.
More than that I’m uncertain. I’m about to give away my virginity to a man I’ve hardly known for more than a few days. The realization nearly makes my head spin.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
My next words come out small and tiny sounding. “Is it going to hurt?”
God, I sound so fucking naive, but I can’t help myself. I’m terrified.
Joseph reaches out gently cupping my cheek. “The only pain I give you will be followed by pleasure.”
Oh God. Yes.
I close my eyes, shuddering, hoping to find the strength to endure what’s to come. I hear him as he takes a step closer, pushing me with him until the back of my knees hit the bed.
You could always end this, says that annoying voice. You could just walk away right now.
I don’t get to answer it.
I feel Joseph move closer, invading my private space and pressing his hard body up against me. I want him. I’ve never known anything else to be as true as that single fact.
Fuck. I feel his hard cock pressing up against my hip.
And damn. It feels SO big. I take an unsteady breath. It’s happening.
His hot lips suddenly press against mine, sending electricity shooting through every one of my nerve endings. I tilt my head back, my lips parting in a sigh, my nipples hardening and my pussy heating with need. The sensation is like nothing I’ve ever felt and I feel like I’m being turned into pure liquid honey, ready to melt into him.
“You want me, Lilly?” Joseph stops kissing me to murmur, his hot breath scorching my neck.