“What about your job? I thought you were in line for a promotion soon.”
“I’ll find something else. I’m sure there are plenty of editing jobs closer to home,” I say, trying to convince myself.
“Okay. Well, are you okay? Did something happen?”
“No. I mean, not really.” I sigh. “Well, sort of, I guess. But that’s not why I want to come home. It’s just...well, maybe it is, but—”
“For heaven’s sake, Liv, will you just tell me what happened?”
“Nothing happened. Travis proposed last night and—”
“What?” I hear the smile in her voice, but before I can mitigate it, she lays the phone down and calls for my father. “Duke! Duke! Liv got engaged. She’s engaged.” She picks up the phone again.
“Momma! Stop,” I say, trying to reign her in. “I said Travis proposed. I didn’t say I was engaged.”
“Oh.” She whispers something to my father and tries unsuccessfully to hide the disappointment in her voice when she returns. “So, you said no?”
“I said no. I don’t love Travis, you know that.”
“Well, I guess I just thought, I hoped, that something changed.”
“No, nothing’s changed. Being with Travis has only reminded me of what real love feels like.” I pause and there’s more silence. “Momma?”
“Yeah, honey?”
“How...is he?” My heart pounds heavily in my chest. I rarely ask her about Gabe and she rarely volunteers information about him, even though I know she sees him regularly. She and my dad are still very close to his parents.
“He’s...okay,” she says carefully. “Gabe’s doing okay now. He’s working with Daddy, actually.”
“What? He is?” There’s a hopefulness in my voice that I can’t hide. He must be doing so much better now.
My mother hears it too. “Liv, honey, Gabe...isn’t the same. He’s different now. He’s not the person you remember. And I don’t think he’s ever going to be.”
My heart sinks to the deepest part of me and new tears rush to my eyes. “I know.” My Gabriel is gone.
“He is doing a lot better, and we couldn’t be happier about it, but—”
I hold the phone away from my ear and cry quietly into my pillow for a few seconds.
“Liv, maybe it’s not a good idea for you to come back here.” Her voice is laced with worry. “Let me come to you and we’ll work everything out.”
“No, I’m fine.” I wipe my face with a fresh tissue. “I promise, I can handle it.” I have to. I can’t keep hiding out in Raleigh anymore. “I need to come home.”
“Okay.” She’s quiet again. “I can’t believe that you’re really coming back.” I hear a small smile in her voice now. “It’s been so long.”
“I know. Me neither,” I say nervously.
“Don’t worry about a thing. Daddy and I will take care of anything you need.”
“Momma, I’m not a little girl anymore. You don’t have to take care of me. I’ll figure everything out when I get there.”
“Okay. You know, Liv, we’re so proud of you. You’ve come so far, since—”
“I know.” I think she and my dad are just happy that I finished college in one piece.
“Are you sure you don’t want me and Daddy to come get you? It’s a long drive by yourself. We could come up next weekend.”
“No. I want to drive myself. I think it will give me time to think about things, clear my head.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.”
“Okay. Well, I’ll get your room ready.”
“Mom, really, it’s fine. Don’t go out of your way.”
“Your dad has been using it to store all of his fishing gear. It needs a good once-over.”
“Well, as long as there aren’t any fish hooks in my bed.” I laugh softly.
“Oh, Liv, your dad is going to be so happy. He’s missed having you here so much these last few years. So have I.”
“I know. I’ve missed it too.”
“Make sure to get your car serviced before you leave, okay?”
“Okay.”
“And if you need anything at all, just let us know.”
“I will.”
“I love you, honey. I can’t wait to see you.”
“I love you too.”
* * *
“I can’t believe you’re leaving me,” my best friend, Trisha, says, hugging my neck tightly. Strangling me, actually. “I’m going to miss you so damn much.”
“I’m going to miss you too,” I choke out, peeling her arms off me. “But I have to do this, Trish. I can’t keep forcing a life here that I’m never going to fit into, or I’ll lose what’s left of me.”
She bobs her head and sweeps one of her auburn curls off her face. “I just feel like you’re going to forget about me.”
“Trish, you’ve been my best friend since our senior year in college. You’re literally the only thing that makes me doubt my decision to leave. You’ve been the best part of my life for the last seven years. How could I forget about you?”
She shrugs. “But I’ve only been a part of your life here in Raleigh. How do I fit into your old life in Georgia?”
“I’m not going back to my old life.” My heart throbs a little, because I can’t go back to my old life, no matter how badly I wish I could. “And we’ll still talk all the time. I mean, let’s be real, you’re kind of a talker,” I tease. “It’s not in your nature to go more than twenty-four hours without communicating.”
She laughs and extends her finger. “Pinky promise? You won’t forget about me?”
I smile and wrap my pinky around hers and give it a shake. “Pinky promise. You don’t forget about me. Now that you’re a big-time interior designer.”
“I won’t. I promise. Unless of course I land that job with the hockey player. Then all bets are off.” I laugh and she hugs me again. “I’m kidding. I have every intention of coming to visit you as soon as you get settled in St. Simons.”
“You better.”
“As long as it doesn’t conflict with my hockey player appointments.”
“Trisha!”
“Kidding.” She releases me and squeezes my hand. “Take care of yourself, Liv.”
I nod over the anxious feeling in my stomach. “I will.” I get in my car and put my seatbelt on.
“Call me when you get there,” she says through the open window.
“I will.”
“Or when you’re half way there.”
“Okay.”
“Or even just a quarter of the way.”
“All right,” I laugh, “got it.”
“Or in like, five minutes...if you feel like talking. Or crying. Or just breathing quietly into the phone.”
“If I resort to breathing quietly into the phone, promise that you’ll stop being friends with me.”
“No way, not going to happen. I’m here for you, even if things get weird.”