“What?” I asked him. He shook his head, bowing to listen to whoever was speaking on the other end.
“Yeah. I understand.” He blew out. “Not like we have choice…yeah…I will tell her. Okay. Thanks, mate.” Lennox lifted his head to me, pulling out his earpiece.
“What?”
“Good news is Theo and the King are safe and back at the palace.”
“Okay.” Weariness lowered my lids. “The bad?”
“I guess half the ceiling fell in during the second explosion,” he tapered off, flicking his chin at the door.
“And they can’t get to us.”
“They’re trying, but they have to go slow because of…” He scratched at drying blood on his cheek.
“Dead bodies.”
“No, it’s the live ones they’re going slow for.”
My shoulders sagged, but my head bobbed, my hands going to my hips. “We’re alive and safe. So we wait. It’s fine.”
“It might be all night.”
Staring up at him, nerves danced around in my stomach. Being locked in with him was not safe for me.
“Oh, Dalton told me to tell you Theo says he loves you and is thinking about you.”
I couldn’t even stop my flinch at hearing those words coming out of Lennox’s mouth, bothering and confusing me far more than I wanted to admit. A deep-seated fear the words said by one and sentiment coming from another were flipped upside down.
Everything inside me felt like the bomb had torn me open like a piñata, spilling truth and awareness I didn’t want to examine all over the floor in utter chaos.
Please, someone, get us out of here soon…
Chapter 2
Thirsty.
Exhausted.
Hungry.
And bloody hell, did I have to pee.
“I already told you, there’s a bucket right there.” Lennox nodded toward the yellow mop pail, watching me shift uncomfortably on the floor. He sat across from me, his back against the wall, his legs stretching out next to mine. I was trying to hold it, hoping someone would open the door at any moment and let us out, but the hours ticked by, making my need overwhelm my pride over urinating in a bucket in front of him.
“Come on, farm girl, don’t tell me you haven’t peed in the bushes instead of going all the way back to the house.”
“All the time.” I curled my knees higher into my chest. “When I was little. And I think this is slightly different.”
“I promise I will face the wall.”
I snorted, the tug straining my muscles around my stomach.
“Never thought of you as the modest type.” He stood suddenly, and I jerked my head up to him. “Well, I have to go. When you’ve had the runs in the middle of a desert with an entire platoon with you, you tend to lose your modesty.”
“Ugh. I didn’t need to know that.”
“What I’m saying is you can watch if you want to.” He winked, turning his back to me. The sound of his zipper raked down my spine like a xylophone. My lungs clenched as my eyes curved over his arse, imagining the tattoo underneath.
My cheeks burned with embarrassment at the sound of liquid hitting plastic, not because I was listening to him pee, but because this felt extremely intimate. I would never even think about being like this with Theo, even if it was him who was locked in here with me. He was far too proper. It would feel awkward and wrong. But underneath his suit, Lennox was raw, real, and visceral, making you feel so alive and aware, cutting through all the bullshite.
Wrapping my arms around my legs, this foreign feeling of utter awareness of him stole the air from the room, dampening my skin and rushing my lungs.
Afraid.
Angry.
Guilty.
I hated it. He challenged me, scared the crap out of me, and jumbled everything I thought I understood.
“Your turn, Duchess.” He twisted back to me, watching me as he zipped back up.
“Please don’t call me that.” I got to my feet, glaring up at him. Fine, he wanted to see if the country girl would take his dare? Keeping my eyes on him, I moved around him to the bucket, his eyes tracking my every move. I positioned myself, my fingers sliding down to the bottom of the A-line flowery dress they put me in, curling around the hem.
His shoulders rose as his chest filled.
I should have told him to turn away, give me some semblance of privacy, but the words caught in my throat, something shifting in that moment. The cage I had been living it now rubbed against my bones, feeling itchy and confining. My world had become so small in its grandeur—everything above standard, perfect, by the book. As a child, I liked to color out of the lines, but after years of being told to conform, I did to keep the peace. Lennox was pushing me out of the boxes everyone put me in, making me question myself. My limits. My rules.
The space between us grew thick with tension—a dare.
My hands curled up my skirt, tugging at my knickers, slowly sliding them down my legs.
He sucked in, his expression unaffected, but his chest moved rapidly, his throat bobbing. I didn’t break my gaze from him as I did my business, wanting to push this boundary within myself. To see where my lines were drawn.
My heart pounded, but it only took a few moments to realize I wasn’t ashamed or uncomfortable. All my issues yammering in my head weren’t really mine, but society’s opinions berating me, telling me how I should think, respond, and feel.
Neither of us looked away, the flashlight glinting off the gold flecks ringing his pupils, making him appear like a feral animal in the dark.
Tugging my panties back up, I straightened, feeling strangely confident. Strolling back around Lennox, my shoulder brushed his as I went back to my place on the floor, feeling a hundred times better.
Lennox didn’t move. His back facing me, he stared at the ground, taking in deep breaths.
I affected him.
And I liked that.
Too much.
The poise I felt a moment ago crumbled around me, and a truth I wanted to ignore, to tear up into little bits, bounced up to the surface, dancing on my chest, not letting me disregard it as something else.
I knew it had been there a while. Longer than I wanted to admit to myself.
Curling into a ball, I faced the wall, squeezing my lids, air struggling to fully touch my lungs. Awareness came with a harsh price. Once you welcomed it, you couldn’t hide from it.
Brutal.
Cruel.
I heard him lowering himself to the ground next to me, the heat of his body reaching for me like fingers, crawling over my skin, consuming me.
My awareness became its own entity in the room. A conscious, living and breathing monster, switching every nerve I had in my body to high.
“Spencer?” My name on his lips pulsed desire through me, crunching me into a tighter ball. “Hey.” His palm grazed my shoulder.
Don’t touch me. Panic flayed around at the base of my neck, grinding my teeth together. My emotions were riding high being locked in this small space with him, and after our brush with death, the craving to feel every bit of life throbbed through my body.
“I’m sorry. I should have turned away. I crossed the line.”
I twisted my head around to look at him. That’s why he thinks I’m upset? Because he watched me pee?
“Theo’s my mate…you’re his girl.” He dug his knuckles into the space between his brows, breathing out. “I can’t seem to think clearly.”