“I’m not really.”
“Then why agree?”
“I like you.” Jonathan said. “Like, really like you.” Maybe even love you.
Jonathan smiled, looking at every angle of her face for some kind of clue to her thoughts. She smiled back at him but said nothing.
The food arrived, and she offered him gooey bites and he let her pick off his plate. Still, as she sopped up pieces of her toast with syrup, he watched her and couldn’t quite pinpoint the issue, if there was one.
“Is everything okay?” he asked. “You seem off.”
“Off?” she asked with a puzzled look on her face.
“All of this is fine, right?”
“Oh, yeah,” she said as she took another bite. “Totally.”
For emphasis, she nodded as she took another bite. With her mouth full, she said, “I’m having a great time.”
“Good.” He stabbed another bite of English muffin with a piece of Canadian bacon and part of an egg. She said she was having a great time, so he believed her. Still, there was something different, not quite right.
Zoey dropped her fork. She leaned in conspiratorially. “I know what we can do.”
“What?” Jonathan asked.
“Sex. Lots of it.”
With the mention of sex, his cock stirred against his athletic shorts. His dick seemed up for the challenge.
“Sure,” he said. Zoey smirked with a flick of her eyebrows, and Jonathan wolfed down the rest of his meal.
22
“Mom? Mom?” Zoey yelled into the echoing house, even though her mother’s car wasn’t in the driveway and she knew her mother wouldn’t be home until three thirty. Jonathan waited patiently in the tiny foyer with his nylon duffel bag over his shoulder.
“The coast is clear,” Zoey said. She grabbed Jonathan’s hand and pulled him down the hallway to her room. It was already eleven forty-five and in less than twenty-four hours, Jonathan would be back in Phoenix. His comments about visiting should’ve encouraged her, but it made her chest tighten and her breath catch. She remembered thinking about the wedding weekend before it happened, stressing about it, imagining every scenario, every way it could go. She had thought there was no way Jonathan would be standing in the middle of her tiny room, ready to have sex, but here he was. It felt like a whirlwind.
He dropped his bag on the carpet. “Do you want to shower or…”
Zoey collided with him and took his mouth with hers. Jonathan picked her up, his hands cupping her ass, and threw her on the bed. She giggled as she bounced, and then he was there, between her legs, molding himself to her.
This feels so fast, crazy fast. Who knew this would happen? What is going to happen after this? Zoey shook her head to stop the spiral.
Stop thinking, Zoey Elizabeth, and have sex with the man.
Jonathan pulled back and looked at her. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, why wouldn’t it be?” She sat up slightly and took her tank top off and then rolled on top of him, so he was sitting up and she was facing him. They kissed with increasing need. Zoey peeled her sports bra off, and he palmed her breasts. She needed him inside of her, filling her and making the future clearer. Anything to avoid this feeling of overwhelm creeping over her that started at Sunny’s when he hinted at a future in Phoenix.
She was getting everything she ever wanted with Jonathan. He was more responsive and caring, taking her feelings into account and acting like she always wanted him to. The sex was unbelievable. Still, the future terrified her, even as she unzipped his pants and filled her hand with him.
“You are so sexy,” he said into her mouth as they made out, devouring each other’s mouths and tongues. His mouth traveled down her abdomen, but Zoey grabbed his face.
“I just want you in me,” she said. Jonathan kept her on him, facing him, as he fumbled in the side pocket of his bag for a condom. She ripped open the foil with her teeth and rolled it expertly over his shaft as he leaned back, his shirt barely pushed up and his shorts around his thighs. She yanked down her leggings and climbed on slowly, letting him in, inch by inch.
It was quick and fast after that. She draped her arms over his shoulders as she rode him, up and down as he tried to grab a kiss or two. Jonathan’s breath quickened as he got closer, and his thumb on her clit worked her up so they finished within seconds of each other, collapsing into a sweaty, sticky heap on her bed.
Exactly what she needed. No thoughts, no fears. Just being present.
Jonathan walked to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. Zoey curled up on her bed, naked with a thin film of sweat over her body. “That was fun.”
“Definitely,” Zoey said. The monkey mind was gone, the swirl of endorphins relaxing her limbs and her neck. Everything was fine.
Jonathan laid down next to her, still fully clothed, while she made no move to put on clothes. The heat of the summer day pulsed through the window, and her mother always kept the house at seventy-nine degrees to save on electricity.
“I never thought I would have sex in this room again.” Jonathan’s eyes still looked at the popcorn ceiling as his fingertips skimmed her skin. She curled up into his armpit that smelled like sweaty, sexy man, and her mind was still clear. Thank God.
He leaned down to kiss her sweetly and brushed her hair from her face. “I feel like wet hot garbage.”
“We should probably shower,” Zoey said. “Just let me lie naked here for a second. You can have it first.”
“Not together?” Jonathan asked.
Zoey shook her head. “Just let me have my post-orgasm moment in peace.”
Jonathan kissed her on the forehead before he disappeared into her en suite bathroom, something remarkable for such a tiny house. She heard the shower and the fan power on as she lay splayed on the bed, feeling the air hit her slightly damp body. It was refreshing that she could tell her mind to shut up and it did what it was told.
After Jonathan finished and Zoey rinsed off, Zoey wrapped a white fluffy towel around her, tucking in a corner between her breasts. Her hair, damp from the shower, curled in ringlets, and some mascara residue collected under her eyes. When she walked out, Jonathan sat on the corner of the bed in a light tan shirt and black shorts. He smiled when he noticed her.
“Didn’t you used to have a lot of your art on your walls?”
“Yeah,” Zoey said. “I actually moved out and then back in. They’re all in storage.”
“This room doesn’t feel like you.”
Zoey nodded in agreement. “This is only temporary. Until I pay off my loans.”
“I accidentally looked at your planner,” Jonathan blurted.
“It’s fine,” Zoey said, sitting down next to him in her towel. She pulled the planner from her desk and held it up for both of them to see. She highlighted and color-coded each shift, and the next week was scheduled down to the minute, with shifts in the early morning at Cycle Yoga Love to closing shifts at the restaurant.
“It seems like a lot,” Jonathan said, skimming his eyes over the pages.
“It’s crazy right now, but that’s the only way I’m going to make the kind of money I need to get rid of these student loans.”