I was pulled out of the way by my mom, her face almost as pale as her blonde hair as she focused on Zane. The cop beside us radioed it in, requesting an ambulance and my mom sent me back for Shawn. I sprinted into my room and found Shawn standing over my bed where Phil was. I stopped in disgust, but my disgust would have to wait.
“Shawn, come quick. Zane’s hurt.” I whispered it to him, not wanting Coop to overhear. Things were strained enough without Coop appearing from the closet. I wanted to go to him and have him hold me, but his words came back to me and I steeled myself against him. He didn’t want me. He’d made that perfectly clear over the past few days.
The next hour saw the house turn into a crime scene, where Zane was rushed to the ER and Phil was charged with two counts of assault. As soon as he was out of my room, I rushed in and stripped my bed forgetting for a moment about the boy hidden in my closet. I needed to let him out, but I couldn’t face him. His words haunted me and all I could think was how I repulsed him. Then I remembered about Zane and I needed to tell Coop about his brother.
I opened the closet door, and he was sitting under my coats with his head in his hands. His shoulders shook with sobs, but I wasn’t about to comfort him after everything that had happened over the previous week. I waited for him to compose himself and as he drew his apprehensive eyes up to where I stood, leaning on the door watching him.
“Bailey, please let me explain. I’m… I was…” He spoke and his voice cracked as tears spilled over, but I held my hand up stopping him.
“Coop, you don’t get to talk right now. Zane’s in the hospital with a serious head injury and our parents are with him.”
His eyes widened in terror and he swallowed before nodding. He shuffled forwards and stood a little wonkily, swaying from side to side. He moved towards me and my entire body stiffened. His face fell at my reaction to his closeness, and he bit his lip as he passed me, brushing his hand against my side. I jumped away from his touch and his back stiffened as he walked out of my room.
I wanted to call him back and take him into my arms, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t make my mouth open and part of me didn’t want to. The sane part of me wanted to see him go, but my heart and pride were hurting both at the pain he was in, and how vile he’d been.
I focused my energy on remaking my bed, but my skin burned where it hit the asphalt and my wrist ached. As soon as my bed was remade, I wanted to climb into it, but I needed to eat something. Slowly, I moved towards the stairs, stopping when I saw Coop walk back up them with a pinched face.
Tears stung my eyes at the dejected despair I saw in his eyes and I wanted to hug him, but I forced my hands to stay at my side as he met my stare. “I’ve got to stay home while Zane goes to have tests.” I bobbed my head to show I’d heard him as he moved past me, staying as far away from me as possible. His door closed slowly, and I breathed a sigh of relief before heading downstairs.
I made myself two grilled cheese sandwiches and sat at the counter to eat. The food tasted like cardboard and I had to force myself to swallow each mouthful. I sat contemplating the second one and I decided that I’d give it to Coop. His brother was in the hospital; I needed to be a grown-up about it, and he needed me.
My heart thudded as I climbed the stairs slowly, my palms sweating. I had two sodas in one hand and a plate in the other. As I approached his partially open door, I could hear voices and I raised my hand to knock, but the sight of him sitting on the bed with Jan, who had her face between his legs took all the air from my lungs. The plate slipped sideways and cracked on the ground and his eyes shot up.
He caught my glimpse for a second before he rolled his shoulders and leaned back. Jan tried to turn at the sound, but he held his hand on her head, holding her in place. The tears that had threatened broke free and I scrambled away from his door.
As soon as I was in my room, I started rushing around throwing clothes and school stuff into my duffel bag. I’d leave and go stay with Wendy or Cate and go to school Monday from there. As I packed, I saw something poking out from under my drawers. It was Coop’s birthday present and I wanted to destroy it, but I couldn’t do that.
I’d collected pictures from all around the house, school, and snaps of us together. The cover was entirely made up of logos of his favorite bands on the front with a brown background and the back was made up of places we’d talked about visiting: Vancouver, Washington, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Austin.
I had a gift box for it, and as I placed it inside, I ignored the tears in my eyes. My bag packed, I rushed for the door, propping the gift up beside his door and doing my best to ignore the sounds of sex coming from his room. I sprinted for the stairs feeling sick and rushed to the garage, where I jumped into my car.
As I pulled away, I remembered that I’d forgotten my cell cable. I’d be able to borrow one surely, so I left without a word to him, showing up at Cate’s where I spent the rest of the weekend. I didn’t hear from Coop and I only spoke to my mom to find out what was happening with Zane. She said something about his blood being too thin and him having a bleed on the brain, which had put him in intensive care.
She told me I was to visit after school Monday, but I didn’t want to. It was Coop’s birthday and when I told her that I was staying at Cate’s, all she said was that it was probably for the best and hung up. I spent the weekend missing him and hating him. My whole catalog of emotions was spent, and I went to school Monday feeling like a shell of who I was.
I didn’t see Coop all morning, and when I did see him, I wished I hadn’t. His face was pinched and pale. His eyes were dead, and he stared at the ground. Butterflies erupted in my stomach at the sight of him, but they twisted to bees as Jan appeared by his side. His eyes met mine as I stood at my locker, watching them. As soon as I met his gaze, I tore my eyes away from him and tried to concentrate on getting what I’d been looking for in my locker.
Grabbing my biology textbook, I slammed my locker shut and Coop was standing behind me, alone. My body burned from his proximity, and he reached out, grabbing my book as it tumbled from my hand. I snatched it away from him and spun to walk down the hall. The noises in the hall turned to silence as I focused on trying to ignore him.
I rushed down towards the cafeteria, taking the almost always abandoned stairs at the back end of the building. Since it was lunchtime the stairs were empty, and as the door swung closed behind me, I released the breath I was holding and leaned against the wall. As I closed my eyes, the door opened, and a gentle hand touched my arm.
Sparks shot up and down my arm meaning I didn’t need to open my eyes to know who it was. His scent filled the air, masculine, with a little hint of spice, and my body shivered, reacting to him as it always did. I sucked in a breath and hissed through my teeth as he leaned against the wall beside me.
“Bailey, look at me, please.” His voice was gentle, husky, and a little hoarse. I shook my head and kept my eyes firmly shut. Without warning his mouth closed over mine and his fingers curled in my hair, pulling my head back so he could get better access. I couldn’t think as he kissed me, I just let go for a moment, and then everything that had happened previous week came back to me in amazing clarity. My stomach rolled and I pulled away from him.
“No, Coop,” I hissed breathlessly as tears stung my eyes. He lifted his confused face to mine and ran his finger over my slightly swollen lips. His eyes darkened in hunger.