I shook my head and took a sip of my drink, glancing back out of the window. The first snow of the year was beginning to fall, and it fluttered down slowly past the window as Jake and I sat in silence, sipping our drinks.
“Cooper, I’m here for you. If you wanna talk or if you need a getaway driver, I’m here.”
I smiled over at him and gave a brief nod, but our flight was being called. As it was announced, my cell pinged, and it was a message from my dad.
Remember our deal, Cooper. Don’t mess up Bailey’s life because you are selfish.
I swore and closed my eyes, tossing back the rest of my drink and following my uncle Jake to our gate. He was seated at the back of first-class and I was at the front. There were a number of people I knew on the flight, but no one I wanted to speak to, so I leaned back in my seat and closed my eyes as the four drinks warmed me.
My thoughts strayed to Bailey and how devastated she’d looked when I’d said no to staying. I knew I had to text her. I had to send a message to say that it was okay to move on. I’d keep a part of her with me always. I took out my heart and rubbed my hand along it, thinking of what I wanted to say to her.
After a few seconds, I composed a message and clicked send, just as the plane began to taxi down the runway. I turned my cell off and shoved it into my bag, before leaning back and waiting for take-off. I poured my heart into the message and I just hoped she’d understand how much I loved her. I’d do anything, even destroy my own future if it meant she was happy.
I didn’t know goodbyes could be so hard, but I feel like my heart has been ripped out. I’ve always loved you and I need you to do one thing before I delete this number. I need you to promise me one thing. Find someone who deserves you, who makes you smile and wants everything with you because you deserve it, Bailey Walker. I’ve loved you forever, but I need to let you go and let you fly free because I want you to be happy and all I do is make you miserable. Take care, my beautiful Bails.
Love always,
Coop
As we began to ascend, I decided that I didn’t want to marry Jan. I didn’t want that life. I couldn’t do that to her or to me, it wasn’t fair to either of us and the only reason she wanted to marry me was so she could win. I wasn’t a prize. I was a colossal douche and had just walked away from the only girl I’d ever loved because I was scared of my dad.
Well, no more. It didn’t matter what my dad did to us as long as we were together and as soon as this plane landed, I was going to go and end things with Jan. I couldn’t marry her when I was still in love with someone else. I needed to stop letting my dad rule my life. It wasn’t worth it. Nothing was worth feeling like this. I just hoped I wasn’t too late, and that Bailey would forgive me for leaving her behind.
I leaned back and closed my eyes thinking over the past few months and how hard it had been to stay away from Bailey when all I wanted was her.
I thought back over the two months that had passed, nausea rose in me as her face as I left her standing there appeared behind my lids. She looked broken, numb, and it was all my fault. I hadn’t wanted to leave. I’d had to drag my legs forward because saying goodbye to her was never in my plan, but I had to do it. I had to leave her so she could be free of me, even though I’d never be free of her.
I tried to shake it off, desperately waiting for the seat belt sign to go off so I could get another drink, but like a glutton for punishment my mind wandered back to my bachelor party.
I only had vague memories that continuously assaulted me from the bar on the night of my bachelor party. I remembered Bailey being there and god, she looked incredible. My dick went hard as soon as she walked in. I was drunk, I had to be. Seeing Bailey had dragged up all of my old feelings and I knew without a doubt, I’d never gotten over her.
My mind wandered further back, and I remembered the conversation with my dad two weeks after I’d ended things with Bails. I was struggling hard. I watched as she began to go out more and more, with Jay and with her friends, and I forced myself to go out on dates. Nothing was right and I never dated anyone long.
My dad spoke to me one night when I’d come home from a party, wasted. He saw me as I stood watching Bailey as she danced around the family room with her earbuds in. Her ass shook to the beat and my mouth watered. My eyes darted around, and I could see my dad standing watching me.
“Come with me, Cooper!”
His voice was ice-cold, and my stomach dropped. I knew I was in for a beating, but I followed regardless. He surprised me when he pointed to the chair in his office and I sat down slowly, watching him as he paused on the edge of his desk. He was like a snake and would pause before the strike.
“Cooper,” he began, and I glanced up at him.
He watched me through narrowed eyes and leaned close to me. My arms began to itch as they always did when I was feeling under pressure from my dad.
“I am speaking to you like a man tonight. I don’t know if something has been going on between you and Bailey, but I’m warning you now that if something has been going on or if I get so much as an inkling that you two are more than stepbrother and stepsister, I promise you that you’ll regret it forever.”
I opened my mouth to protest but closed it at the look my dad was giving me.
“Bailey is young, impressionable, and unstable. She has lied about having a brother and I don’t trust her. In fact, if she wasn’t Henri’s daughter, then I’d have her committed because fantasies like that are unsafe. Her mom has struggled with Bailey’s mental health since she was little…”
He paused to let me digest the words. I wanted to tell him he was wrong, that I’d been to Louis’s grave with Bailey and met her dad there, but that would do more harm than good. He’d never leave us alone if he thought there was something between us.
“We’ll keep an eye on the situation with it, but if you both don’t stay away from each other, then I’ll have no choice than to get her locked up for her own safety. She’ll be committed and will miss her final year at school which will mean no college, no future, and no money.
“Her dad cashed in her trust fund for his other kids, so Bailey is entirely dependent on me for college and I will not put her through college if I think, even for a second, that there is something between you both.”
He stopped speaking and stared at me as I digested his words. He would destroy her, not me, her. I couldn’t believe it and my hands were clenched into fists on the chair.
“I’ll also make sure that no one will hire her, Cooper. She’ll lose everything and it’ll be all your fault. Ask yourself if you can live with that? Can you live with making her lose her whole future?”
With that he stood and left the room, leaving me stewing on the chair as I pondered his words. I had to stay away from her. Far away. I needed to stay out later, date more, and try to make her hate me. If she hated me, then she’d be okay. She’d be safe from my father and his wrath. He would leave her be and I could go off to college, safe in the knowledge that she’d get to fulfill her dreams, no matter the cost to me.
She deserved better than me anyway, but every day seeing her was like a new form of torture. Her sexy-as-sin ass sometimes brushed by me in the kitchen, or she’d pass me in the hall and her scent would invade my nose. It was like a knockout punch to the gut and hiding how I felt had never been harder, but I’d made it by the tips of my fingers and off I went to college.