“Sure.” She folded her arms across her chest and rubbed her shoulders, indicating she was cold. She wanted me to go.
You should want me to go.
“Good night.” I gently kissed her cheek. “Sleep well.”
She closed the door without saying anything. I stood on the porch for a few moments, trying to decide if I should go back in and tell her the truth. What would that accomplish? She’d hate me for lying. My way was better. I was falling for her. If I stayed the course, I could have everything I wanted without hurting her.
It was late but maybe I should call John. A late night phone consultation was probably what I needed but then I remembered he was on a long weekend in Florida with his wife. I wouldn’t bother him.
I waved to Alec, who had gotten out of the car and opened the door for me.
“You can take me home,” I said with much regret as I climbed into the passenger seat.
I needed a stiff drink and some time to figure out my next move. If I stayed one step ahead of this mess I made, I’d be fine. Wouldn’t I?
10
Kara
What the hell just happened? How could he end the night like that? We were in sync. He wanted me. I didn’t imagine the way he looked at me, the subtle touches throughout the night, his kisses, the heated glances he shot my way. Even when he was presenting the award, he couldn’t take his eyes off me. I was certain we were on the same page.
I sat on the bottom step of my stairs, drinking a glass of wine. Xavier Trapp, why can’t I get you out of my mind? From the second I met him, he had totally consumed me. Now that I was getting to know him, I wanted more than anything to be with him. What was holding him back?
Carla didn’t bother knocking. She entered the house holding a bottle of wine.
“Hey.” I waved to her. “Thanks for coming.”
“What are you doing over there?”
“Getting drunk.”
“What happened?”
“I’m not sure.” I stood and paced the foyer. “One minute everything was heated and passionate and the next he couldn’t get out of here fast enough.”
“Did you have sex?”
“No.” I gulped my wine. “I thought we were going to and then…”
“Then what?”
“I told him his eyes were the same color as Zoey’s.”
“Awkward.” She went to the kitchen to get a wine glass.
“Tell me about it.” I followed her, plopping myself down on a stool at the counter. “I don’t know what made me say that. I was focused on what he was doing to me and then I blurted that out.”
“What did he say?”
“What could he say? He left.”
“Oh.”
“The night was perfect. He was so attentive and wonderful. You should have seen the way people flocked to him. When we walked into the ballroom, the press took so many pictures.”
“I saw them.”
“They’re on-line?”
“People are very intrigued with the woman who is dating the city’s most eligible bachelor.”
“I don’t think we’re dating.” I pushed my glass toward her. “I need a refill.”
“You need a do-over.” She took out her phone. “Go pack that bag and I’ll call you a car.”
“What? No!” I reached for the wine bottle. “No way am I going to make a fool of myself twice tonight.”
“You can turn this around.”
I shook my head because I wasn’t sure how to fix this.
“Do you want him?”
“More than anything.” I poured another glass of wine. “No one has ever made me feel the way he does. When I’m with him I feel special. He looks at me like I’m the only one in the room. There’s a spark between us but something is holding him back. I don’t know.” I sighed. “Maybe he’s not as into me as I am to him.”
“That’s bullshit.” She took my glass and finished the wine. “I saw the way he looked at you tonight. If I wasn’t here, he would have devoured you.”
“That’s how it was all night.” Until I screwed up and brought my daughter into the conversation at the most inappropriate time. I totally turned him off. What was I thinking?
“Do you still want him?”
“I wanted him to be the one to take this dress off me.”
“Don’t lose sight of your goals.”
“What should I do?”
“Pack a bag. Your car will be here in five minutes.”
Now that I let Carla talk me into showing up on X’s doorstep, I had no idea what to do next. Maybe we weren’t meant to be. If we were, wouldn’t we still be at my house making love? That was where the evening was headed. I shouldn’t be here begging for him to have sex with me. When had I ever been the type to beg? If he wanted me, he should come and get me.
Decision made! As I turned to walk away from his door, it opened. I stood with my back to him, frozen in time. What do I do?
“Kara?”
“Yes.” I faced him, silently cursing Carla under my breath. Holy hell! He had removed most of his tux. He stood before me, holding a drink in nothing but his tight-fitting dress pants. He’d even loosened his belt. As I studied his bare, bulging chest and impressive six-pack abs, I took a breath to center myself. It didn’t work.
“I saw you on the security cameras.”
“Oh.” Why hadn’t I thought about that?
“You must be cold.”
Quite the opposite, really.
“Come inside.” He took the bag from my shoulder and placed it in the foyer “Let’s get you by the fire.”
“I’m sorry to show up like this.” It was Carla’s idea. “I…”
“I’ve been thinking about you too.”
“Your house is… wow.”
As we moved inside, there was a grand staircase that faced the doors and in the center was a landing with huge windows that boasted an incredible backdrop of the river. He led me down a hall, through the kitchen and to a massive room with more windows with a view of the city in the distance. Soft music streamed through the house and the only light in the room came from the gas fireplace.
He tossed a few pillows from the sofa onto the floor in front of the hearth. “Can I get you a drink?”
“Can I have a sip of that?” I pointed to his drink.
“It’s vodka on the rocks. Nothing mixed in.”
“Sounds good.” I needed something stronger than wine.
“It’s all yours.” He handed it to me.
“Thank you.” I pressed my lips to his glass while he watched me drink. I squeezed my eyes shut and swallowed. I’d never had straight vodka before but it was surprisingly smooth. As the liquid coated my mouth and tongue, a calmness settled over me. I took another sip before handing the glass back to him.
“Sit in front of the fire.” He put the drink on the coffee table behind us and joined me on the floor.
I slipped off my shoes, taking in his muscular form. I didn’t expect him to be half-naked. No view through the windows of his house could top what was right in front of me. He was fit but I had no idea how athletic he was under those expensive shirts.