No matter how much I love him.
“I’m really not in the mood.”
“My dear sweet Meg, always determined to play it straight.” His smile never wavers, but some of the warmth leeches out of his eyes. A warning, that. “You should know better by now.”
Yes, I should. I very much should know better by now. There was a time when I’d happily dance to any tune he set, wanting to please him for the sure happiness he shone down on me in those perfect moments. Now our love is more cruel edges and the kind of cut that one doesn’t even notice until hours later.
I lean back, putting as much distance between us as he’ll allow. “Like I said, I’m not in the mood.” I sound cold and uncaring, but I can’t seem to stop myself.
“Jafar’s baby girl is rubbing off on you, I see.” He studies his wine glass, still half-full despite our ordering before the meal arrived. “How is the darling Jasmine these days? For reasons unknown, Jafar seems disinclined to respond to my calls.”
For reasons unknown.
It certainly doesn’t have to do with Hades orchestrating her kidnapping a handful of months ago. “Pride a little hurt? Maybe you should have taken care of Ali before he damaged the Underworld’s reputation.” I smirk. I can’t help it. We know each other’s buttons too well, and even though it hurts, we can’t help dancing on them as it suits us.
“We’re nothing without our reputation,” he muses, but I can tell he’s already moved on. Whatever he’s thinking of now, it’s not the events from a few months ago. Hades reaches over and clasps my wrist in a deceptively gentle grasp. He flips it over and runs his thumb over the tattoo there, a blue flame. It marks me as his.
Forever.
My body goes tight, readying in fight or flight, my breath stalled in my lungs as I wait to see what he’ll do. Hades. My Sir. My owner in every sense of the word. I might dominate others in his club, might have what appears to be free rein over everyone there as I choose, but he is the only one who holds my leash. With Hades, there is no give and take.
He dominates. I submit. The end.
It used to be enough. We were in this together, true partners, true equals. These days, it feels like we’re going through the motions with each other. Coming to this quaint little restaurant with its faux romantic lighting and expensive wine list might be out of our ordinary, but this game just proves that Hades isn’t really trying to bridge the gap. He simply wants a new setting for a new scene.
Exhaustion rolls over me in a wave. I am so incredibly tired of playing. I should part my lips and tell him exactly where I stand, tell him I’m not happy and haven’t been for a long time, beg him to see how wrong things are between us.
I don’t. Even with this man, I’ve learned my lesson too well. The trust we built so painstakingly between us is weathered and beaten. I can’t be sure that he’ll meet me halfway, and because I can’t be sure, I am incapable of taking that first step to reach out.
Instead, I resign myself to another night of pleasure that will hold the pain at bay, at least for a little while. “Heavy-handed, don’t you think?” I keep my tone dry as I pull against his grasp. “After ten years, do you really think it will have magically disappeared if you don’t check it daily?”
“It’s a reminder, Meg. For both of us.” He brings my wrist to his lips and presses a devastatingly sweet kiss there. The contacts shoots straight to my core. When he starts gently, he ends the cruelest, and even as I resist him, I crave what only he can give me. Barbs. Thorns. The kind of heat that scars. His words echo in my head. Let’s play a game.
I shiver, something going soft inside me despite my best efforts to hold steady. “What kind of game?”
“Your favorite kind.” He traces my knuckles with his thumb. “I’m going to pick a person in this restaurant… and you’re going to fuck them.”
I twist and look out at the room. We’ve never been here before, but it’s packed on a Friday night. The main room is small enough to create an intimate feel. With the low lighting and soft music filtering through hidden speakers, it’s the kind of place that invites a couple to lean in, to speak softly in each other’s ears, to buy into the romance that exists simply by being here. And it is almost exclusively couples in here in pairs or on double dates. The food was an eclectic mix and though I was too on edge to eat my fill, the smells from neighboring tables have my mouth watering. I’ll come back here again someday alone, when I can enjoy the meal without anticipation putting off my appetite.
I study the tables I can view from my spot, but I don’t see anyone I recognize. That’s a warning in and of itself. Hades might break my heart over and over again in a thousand different ways, but he would never put me in a position where I could truly be harmed. He may be careless with my heart, but he would never make the same mistake with my body.
Sending me to fuck some stranger? There are so many variables. There’s no way he can control it. No way he can guarantee that I’ll be safe. He’s bluffing. He has to be.
I relax back into the seat and turn back to face him. He is so handsome, his face the subject of so many more good memories than bad, I can almost pretend that nothing has changed. That we’re still fresh in this relationship and nothing has had a chance to sour. I squeeze his thigh with my free hand, letting my fingers drift higher. “You want me to fuck someone here.”
“I’m not in the habit of repeating myself.”
“Unless it suits you.”
His small smile has me shifting closer. He picks my hand off his thigh. “Unless it suits me.” Hades repositions me so that I’m leaning against him, his lips brushing my ear with each word. “Do you see the waiter?”
“What?” Is he serious? He wants me to fuck a waiter?
“The blond.”
I see who he means immediately. Truth be told, I clocked the man when we walked in, the same way I clock anyone who catches my eye. There are half a dozen people in this room who got a second look, but he’s the only one wearing the same white shirt and black pants as the rest of the staff.
He’s old-world movie-star handsome. The chiseled jaw, the easy smile, the big body that is athletic without being over-the-top muscled. Young, too. Not just in age, though if he’s older than twenty-five, I’ll be surprised. No, this guy is almost…
I jerk when I recognize it.
He’s an innocent. There’s something shiny and new about him that will make people like Hades want to tarnish it. I used to be the same way, once upon a time. Now, I’m the one who does the tarnishing. “I don’t play with babies, Hades.”
“Come now, Meg.” He nips my earlobe. “Look at how eager he is to please. He’ll probably come in his pants the second he tastes your pussy. All that enthusiasm in such a fetching package. You should thank me for giving him to you.”
I shouldn’t.
I really shouldn’t.
Whoever this man is, I know better than to take this at face value. Hades didn’t pick him randomly. He has a plan, has some manipulation going on. If I agree to this, I’m playing a part, and I don’t get to cry foul later when it all comes to light. I lick my lips. “Thank you, Sir.”