More than anything, he wanted Sierra to find peace here on the ranch with him.
* * *
Sierra walked in the front door behind the boys and spotted her mom cleaning up the toys the boys left out. “Mom, I’ll do that.”
“I’m almost done.” Her mother tossed toy cars into the bin and pulled apart the racetrack.
Sierra helped the boys out of their zip-up hoodies and hung them on the coatrack. “Go upstairs and brush your teeth. Change into your pj’s and I’ll be up in a few minutes to read books.”
Her mom finished pulling apart the last piece of the track and tossed the two plastic pieces into the bin. “Lord, it’s been a long time since I had to pick up after kids.” She put the toy bin next to the other two the boys had brought down from upstairs.
“You won’t have to do it much longer.”
Her mother gave her a knowing smile. “Is that man of yours getting impatient?”
A smile tugged at her lips. “Honestly, we both are.”
Her mom put her hand on the coffee table and used it to help support her while she rose from sitting on her feet. She rubbed at her sore knees before she stood straight. “It’s been just as long since I spent that much time on the floor. I hope Mason knows what he’s in for.”
Sierra listened to the water running upstairs while the boys brushed their teeth. “We talked this morning about turning two of the rooms in his house into the boys’ rooms.”
“They’ll love that. Lord knows he’s got the space and then some in that big house.” Dede studied her for a moment. “I take it things with Amy went well.”
“Believe it or not, she had some great advice. She made me feel better. She thinks moving forward is the best thing for me.”
Her mom nodded. “I agree.” Her eyebrows drew together. “I spoke to Heather.”
“She stopped by Mason’s but I left without really talking to her.”
“I hope she apologized to him about her behavior.”
“She did.”
“I understand your frustration with her, Sierra. What she did . . . It makes no sense, and yet, I understand what she wanted.”
“You may want a chocolate bar, but stealing it still comes with consequences.”
“She’s feeling those consequences. And I understand you need time and distance. But I’d like you to consider something that I hadn’t really thought about until I spoke to her. I was so angry about what she did, I didn’t think about the similarities you share.”
Sierra wasn’t sure she wanted to hear this.
Her heart pounded as the answers came to mind and her mother spoke out loud.
“You both lost the man you love. You both have children who will grow up without their father. You both have to explain to them how they are connected. You both have to keep David’s memory alive for your kids.” Dede held up her hand, cutting off words Sierra couldn’t get out her constricted throat anyway. “I know it’s the same but different. I just wanted you to think about that. Heather scolded me for not understanding that she has her feelings, too. I guess what I’m saying is that you both have a side. She was wrong to do what she did, but she did love him. Not that that’s an excuse, but . . . I don’t know. It’s so hard to articulate and reason out.”
Sierra bit back the anger and focused on her mother and how hard she tried to make Sierra understand that somewhere in all this mess, with a little sympathy and understanding, Sierra could see her sister as a woman who’d loved and lost and who grieved like she had once. Heather faced a future similar to hers and a time when she’d have to explain David to Hallee and how their relationship started and ended. It was a tragic love story that might have ended differently if it had been born of truth and honesty instead of mired in lies and deception.
“No matter how you explain it, what she did was wrong. I know you want us all to be the way we used to be. I just don’t think that’s possible. But . . .” She took a deep breath and tried to wrap her head around the next words she gave her mother even if she didn’t wholly believe in them yet. “One day, I hope, Heather and I can understand each other and love more and hurt less.”
Her mom’s eyes overflowed with tears. “Yes. I’d like that very much.” Dede closed the distance and hugged her close. “Thank you, Sierra, for keeping your heart open to possibility.”
Sierra hugged her mom back. “I’m still angry. I still want to kill her. But I feel it a little less today than I did yesterday.”
Heather had been coddled and pampered far too long. Not anymore.
Sierra was taking care of herself first this time.
Her mom released her, but touched her hand to Sierra’s cheek. “I love you, sweetheart. I hope you know that I want the very best for you.”
“I know you do. I know you want that equally for Heather.”
“Well, maybe she gets ten percent less than you now.”
Sierra appreciated the teasing tone, but knew her mother didn’t mean it. And it was okay, because she’d have a hard time not wanting both her sons to be as happy as they could be, either.
“Does that mean you’ll miss me when I move to Mason’s?”
“I will, but still, it’ll be nice to have the house to myself again. I hope my grandsons find their way here often.”
“I bet they will.” After all, they only had one wide pasture to cross to get here. She smiled for her mom. “And so will I.”
“That’s a promise, then.”
Sierra nodded. “Good night, Mom.”
“Good night, sweetheart.”
Sierra made it up the stairs just as the boys turned off their bedroom light, leaving the room in shadows, the heads of their beds bathed in a soft glow from the night-light.
Danny held two books on his chest. Oliver sat on Danny’s bed, waiting for her to take her place next to Danny so Oliver could sink between them.
“Mom?” Danny studied her, his eyes serious.
“Yeah?”
“Is everything okay? Everyone seems upset about something.”
Of course the boys had picked up on the strange vibes. She tried to hide her anger, but they knew something was off.
“You’re right. I discovered some upsetting news when we were at Mason’s house.”
“Did Aunt Heather make you mad?” Oliver played with the ends of her long hair.
“Yes. She did. She took something that belonged to me.”
Danny turned on his pillow to face her. “I hate it when Oliver takes my stuff.”
Oliver crossed his little arms over his chest. “I do not.”
“Yes, you do! All the time.”
“Enough. Anyway, it made me angry and I needed to be by myself for a little while to think about it. But then I talked to Mason and I felt better.” She wanted to turn this conversation to the future. “He made me think about everything that’s happened and all we’ve lost, and you know what? It made me think of all the new things we can have now.”
“Like new Legos.” Oliver looked up at her, hopeful he’d get a new set soon.
“Maybe. But I was thinking about us moving into a new place and you two having your own rooms.” She didn’t give them time to ask questions about where and when. “What color would you like your room to be?”