Colt’s handsome face lit up as he began talking about her, how he’d been raising her to be a country girl, to climb trees and swim in the brook. After awhile, he paused and took another mouthful of water. “I used to read to her at night. I would rock her to sleep in my arms. She was so tiny. I’ve missed everything. She’s grown up without me.”
I watched as Colt dropped his head on top of his hands and slouched forward on the table. “Hey. It’s not long to go now. Just take your time. It’s going to be an adjustment when you get back home to her, but maybe your bond with the horses can be the entry point.”
He lifted his head. “Maybe you’re right. She used to help feed them every morning and talk to them. She’s got a special way with them.”
“See. That’s a good start. How about you? How is your mental health here? I know the conditions aren’t the best.” I frowned as I looked him over.
“I’m not going to off myself if that’s what you mean. But I’ve seen it. One of the guys in cell block D braided a bedsheet together, put in the grill above him, and tightened the knot. The guard found him, blue and stiff, hanging in his cell the next morning,” he said matter-of-factly.
I winced when I heard this. I hated that anyone felt so low that they needed to take their own life, but who knew what demons these men held and what they were in prison for? My eyes averted to the clock behind Colt’s head. We’d been talking for a good while, and our time together was almost up.
“That’s terrible, Colt. Why do you think the rates of suicide are going up in here? Do they not have enough counseling sessions?”
“Nah. It’s nothing to do with that. We’re on top of one another. If you go out to the yard, there’s no room to move. That’s why I ended up doing a lot of in-house activities to keep my mind alert. Going to classes. Signed up to cook. Just so I can get out of the cell.”
“That’s a great idea. You have new skills now. Are you going to live with Bella alone? Or will you keep your mother at your house? I want to make sure Bella is as comfortable as possible.”
“Me too. I’ll have to ask my little queen what she wants to do. Hopefully, she’ll stay with me and live on the farm.”
I noted a few things down on my sheets and drank the last of my water. “Colt, thank you for your time today. I see the time is almost up. I think you and your daughter will be just fine when you come out. I’ll talk to you during our next visit about things you can do to ease her into the changes.”
Colt brushed his eyes over my body one more time, sending a heat signal right to my sex. This man emanated primal masculinity. “Thank you again, Amber. You’ve set my mind at ease. I see that Bella is in good hands.”
He shook my hand once again, and I relished the sensation of the soft pads of his fingers on mine. I signaled the guard for my exit.
I smiled courteously at him. “You’re so welcome, Colt. I will let the Warden know so I can be added to the visiting list for next time.”
I stood and collected my things.
Three
Colt
Those big, brown eyes would make any man melt. The things I wanted to do with that sexy mouth of hers were an absolute sin. I let her walk out first, admiring the curve of her hips and her voluptuous backside as she sashayed out the prison meeting room. If she were one of the horses on my farm, I would want to rein her in. Her voice was soft and smooth like butter, easing my nerves. I knew my baby Bella was in safe hands, and that’s all that mattered. Between Ms. Atwood and my mother, all would be well with her.
The prison guard left the door open and led me back to my cell. They always walked behind prisoners, I guessed, to avoid an attack. My heart dropped as I re-entered the hellhole. My cellmate Errol was lying on his top bunk comfortably. Errol, a bank robber from Merced, was reading a book and had one foot crossed over the other. He was one hell of an eccentric character. He had a curled-up mustache and dark, slick hair. He was about the size of a toothpick and had an extra-pointy nose. He was as sly and as cunning as they came. You didn’t get away with ten bank robberies for ten years without being that.
“Welcome back, cowboy. I just took a shit, so wrap your nose around that.”
As soon as he said it, I felt the putrid aroma of jail feces perforate my nostrils. The problem with the conditions is that the cell only had one shitter for the two of us. We were boxed in together. No wonder murders and suicides were happening every other day.
“You bastard,” I said slowly.
Errol looked over the top of his glasses and smiled. “Just for you, my friend.”
“I could have done without your gift.” The aroma was stinging my nostril hairs and making me sick. In all my four and a half years, I still wasn’t used to it.
“Anything interesting happen?” Errol asked.
I let the smile coming from my lips lift my spirits. “Yeah, kind of.”
Errol laid his book flat across his chest. “Do tell,” he said in a deep voice.
“I got a decent social worker for Bella. She’s really pretty, too. Blond, with big brown eyes.”
“Forget the face.” Errol tutted. He held his hands together as if he was holding watermelons. “What was the size of the tits? What did the ass look like? C’mon man, I’ve been in here for thirteen years. I need more to go on.”
I shook my head. “You fucking pervert.” I put my hand on the small wooden desk in front of me. I had a picture with Bella smiling taped to the wall. She was cuddled up in her mother’s arms on the farm. I remembered that day so clearly.
“Daddy! Daddy! Can I ride Moonlight today? You promised. You said I could try.”
The mortified look on Anna’s face made me grin because I knew firsthand the bond that Bella shared with Moonlight. They both loved one another, and my instincts told me she wouldn’t buck her off.
“Yes, but I’m going to be with you, leading you, okay?”
She’d clapped her little hands together and hugged my neck. “Yay! I’m happy today, Daddy. I’m happy!”
I came out of the memory, or rather Errol shook me out of it.
“Earth to farm boy. Tell me what she was like. I want to know!”
“Ah, she was sweet, real sweet. She promised to look after Bella for me. That’s all I need her to do. I’m going home soon. I can’t believe it,” I confessed to Errol.
“You deserve it. You’ve served your time. Don’t fuck it up and end up back here. I got another year to go. I’m trying to work on this appeal, but my lawyer is horseshit. That’s why I’m reading.” He held up the book to me, and I saw it was a legal handbook.
I frowned at him. “Backyard tactics? Think that will work?”
He lay back again on his bunk, gazing at the ceiling. “I mean, what the hell else am I supposed to do? I’m not going to just let it slide. This fuckface from cell block E is trying to scam me. We got a cigarette run going on, though. That’s what I got running right now to keep myself amused.”
I smirked lightly at him as I slipped into my bottom bunk. “You need me to get Austin involved?”
“Nah, I don’t need any heavy hitters right now. I got it covered. I made a nice bit of pocket change. Two grand in the last two weeks. Not bad for a two-bit hustler, huh?” Errol chuckled weirdly.