“That’d be good.” She tried not to laugh as he struggled to understand what she wanted from him.
He pretended to be annoyed. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“Just a little.” She propped her head on an upturned hand and waited him out.
“You want to know how it’s different…”
“That’s what I said.”
“For one thing, you’re not like anyone I’ve ever known.”
“How so?”
Landon grimaced. “You challenge me.”
“Is that what I’m doing right now? Challenging you?”
“Yes, you’re challenging me to put words to feelings, and I’m not really sure how to do that.”
“You’re doing great so far. Tell me more about these feelings.”
He turned his head to look at her. “I feel something when I’m with you. Something I only ever felt for Naomi. Like you said, she’s my benchmark. I know what that was like, and it’s not as if I was running around looking for that again. But when it appeared on that day in the conference room at the store, I recognized it for what it is.”
“And what is it?”
He huffed out an exasperated laugh. “Something I want more of.”
“Is that rare for you to want more?”
“You already know it’s unprecedented since Naomi.”
Turning on his side, he ran his fingers through her hair and caressed her cheek. “I want to be with you all the time. I had to force myself to stay on that freaking mower until two, when all I wanted was come home. When you heard about Stella, my first thought was I hope I get to meet her, that I can be part of it with you. When I was working, I kept thinking about her and you and trying to figure out how I can support you as you bring her into your life.”
His gaze flipped up to meet hers, earnest, sincere, adorable. “I’ve had a lot of fun with women. I won’t deny that. But I’ve never had to nearly tie myself to the mower so I wouldn’t skip out on work to get to someone as soon as I possibly could.” After a pause, he added, “I’m not sure if that’s what you were looking for, but that’s how I feel.”
“That’s pretty great.”
“I have no interest in Chrissy or Jessica or anyone but you. I want this, between us, to be officially exclusive. Would that be okay?”
“Well, since I’m living in your house, it’d be kind of complicated to date someone else right now.”
His expression went blank with shock.
Amanda laughed as hard as she’d laughed at anything since before the fire upended her world. She laughed so hard, her sides ached. “I’m teasing you, Landon. Joking. Hello? You’ve heard of that, right?”
“My brother and I wrote the book on teasing,” he said, scoffing. “I can’t believe you actually tried to get one over on me.”
“You didn’t honestly think I was serious about dating other people while I’m living with you, did you?”
“Of course not.”
“Liar. I totally got you.”
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
He glared playfully at her. “Not.”
She stuck out her tongue at him. “Too.”
“I can think of better uses for that tongue.”
“Landon…”
“Yes, Amanda?”
“Just for the record… I don’t want to date anyone but you.”
“That’s good to know.”
“And it’s not just because I’m living in your house. It’s because of you. You make me want things I’ve never had, things I never thought I’d want.”
“Like what?”
“A real life. A real relationship. A home. A family.” She rested a hand on his chest and felt the rapid beat of his heart under her palm. “I realize it’s far too soon to talk about those things—”
“It’s not too soon. I want them, too.”
“Even if Stella is part of the picture?”
“Especially then.”
The rush of emotion caught her by surprise, but that was happening a lot lately. “I have to tell you something.”
“What’s that?”
“I quit my job today.”
“Wow. More big news.”
She nodded.
“How’d your mom take it?”
“Better than expected, actually. Turns out she’s thinking about retiring, and we talked about me continuing to do part of her job remotely. It’s something I could do fairly easily from wherever I am, and it would be a nice source of additional income.”
“That sounds good.”
“The best part is it gets me off the travel circuit, which will be important for when I have Stella.”
“True.”
“I also asked Dani if she might consider me for the assistant manager position at the warehouse.”
His smile stretched across his face, lighting up his beautiful golden-brown eyes. “Really?”
She nodded. “Would that be okay? I probably should’ve discussed it with you before I mentioned it to her. It’s your family’s business, after all.”
“It’s absolutely fine with me. Why wouldn’t it be?”
“I don’t know. I’m all over the place lately. I’m still figuring out this new version of myself. I’m apt to be a bit of a mess for a while.”
“You’re not a mess. You’re like a butterfly emerging from your cocoon and spreading your wings.”
“That’s a lovely metaphor.”
“It’s true. I’m looking forward to watching you fly.”
She cupped his cheek and kissed him. “That’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
They made a mad dash to Montpelier to pick up the ring and find a dress for the wedding and were back in Butler by six to drop off the ring to a very thankful Lucas. After they left him, Landon drove Amanda to Hunter’s house, feeling as if they’d had an important breakthrough during that momentous day. They’d agreed to be exclusive, and she was making some big changes that would keep her in Butler. That was the best news of all. He was relieved to know she was looking to put down roots in his town, that she wanted to work for his family’s company and finish raising her daughter there.
These were all good things, and he’d done something rather impetuous earlier when they were in Montpelier, but he couldn’t tell her about that. Not yet, anyway, but he hoped he could show her what he’d bought for her sooner rather than later. It counted as the craziest thing he’d ever done, but she seemed like a gamble worth taking.
With everything moving in the right direction, why did he still have a nagging feeling that despite all their progress, things were still far from settled between them?
He couldn’t say, and that uncertainty kept him off-balance long after they arrived at Hunter’s and settled in for a delicious dinner and a piano lesson for Amanda.
After dinner, while she went with his brother into the room where the piano was located, Landon helped Megan with the dishes.
“Thanks for dinner,” he said. “That pulled pork was amazing.”